A Boy's Story

A new love

"I'm sorry!" I said hurridly.

"Why are you sorry? I'm the one who landed on you," he smiled again, almost smug as if he knew what he'd done, but then again it wasnt a happy smile. He was only putting on a happy show for my sake. I sighed.

"Come on," I said holding my hand out to him, "we need to talk."

-*-*-*-

We walked to the park in half the time it wouldve taken us if we'd crossed the intersection. But as we neared the hill that we usually sit on, he took ahold of my arm, and led me under a nearby bridge.

"Here," he said sitting down, pulling me down with him, "now we can talk without people around..." he muttered. He pulled his knees up to his chest, and a tear dripped from his eye. I didnt try to fight the instinct to keep my arms away. I quickly pulled him to me, and he started sobbing into my chest.

"Shhh, shhh..." I soothed as I rubbed his back and buried my face in his hair, "it's gonna be okay..."

"No... its not," he stuttered, "do you remember when I told you about my best friend Sean?" he said pulling away and wiping his eyes with his hand, "when I had to leave him behind..." he started crying again. I held him closer. What could I do? His pain was killing me too...

"Yes," I said, remembering, "what about Sean? What happened?" I asked looking at his face, wiping away his tears with my fingertips. It was obvious now that he knew that we were more than just friends. Normal guys my age wouldnt comfort eachother like this. But somehow this was strange to me. Not because we were both boys, but because Josh always seemed like the comforter to me. I've never seen him this way... He's always the one the take charge and be confident...

"He-h-he.." he struggled with the words. Stopping and taking in a deep breath, he looked me in the eyes and straight out said it. "He died."

I couldnt say anything. All I could do was hold him there in my arms until he stopped crying.

It seemed like hours before we finally fell asleep there, under the bridge, with our arms around eachother. When I woke, he was laying next to me, his hands under his head, fast asleep. He looked... incredible... a sleeping angel... Without thinking about it I slowly leaned down to his face and touched my lips to his. I didnt really kiss him though, it was more like just slightly brushing my lips agains his. But it was still amazing. I sighed and laid back, then I snuggled closer to him.

Startling me, he shifted and put his arms around me. My eyes popped wide, I hadnt realized he was awake! He opened his eyes and gazed into mine warmly. He smiled that warm smile... and leaned in to kiss me again...

I half expected to wake up right about then, but he just kept kissing me. And it was getting lovelier by the second... I found myself kissing him back. Longer, longer, and longer... Better, better, and better...

This was what I've been waiting for since the minute I met him, better than anyone else I've been with. Better than...girls...

When his lips started to slow down, and I could feel him start to pull away; I clung to his shirt and leaned my head forward to make it last longer. He chuckled and opened his eyes. Grinning at me, he brushed the hair out of my eyes. As if he had the same feelings for me as I do for him. While we were kissing, he had moved above me, so now he was hovering above my face. But his body was only half-way on me though.  

"Wow... That was..." he paused, looking for the right word, "amazing..." he smiled again. My heart went crazy and I smiled too.

"I agree," I said quietly. Unable to quit grinning for one second.

"But..." he said slowly, his eyebrows pulling together, "I didnt know... that... you were..." he stopped and looked at me confused. He moved his hand in a circular motion, gesturing for me to finish. I didnt... Oh! He was thinking that he didnt know I was gay... well I didnt know either... so...

"Gay...?" I asked.

"Yeah..." he said slowly. But he didnt look surprised, just confused.

"Oh... well I'm not," I answered, raising my eyebrows. I still thought girls were hot...

"Oh, so your bisexual I guess," he said pulling back. We both sat up, straighting our clothes and hair.

"No... Until now, I've only been with girls," I put a small smile on my face, as if saying, 'Yeah, your changing me.' He blushed, and I knew he understood.

"So... do you still like girls, or are you into both now?" He asked, almost like he didnt care one way or another. I leaned forward to kiss him again, to make my point clear. I only meant to kiss him for a short second, but I couldnt stop. He seemed more than happy to go along with this. His lips were soft but loose on mine. Before we could go any further I pulled away, remembering that we were in a public area. And even though it was still dark, and the stars were still out, someone could still find us. Or worse... maybe a little kid or something... Ugh!

"Public area," I whispered, blushing.

"Right."

"So were you...?" I asked, getting back into conversation.

"Yeah, well I like both guys and girls," he said, completely at ease. That caught me by surprise. Not because I wasnt expecting it, because I was, but because it means that he'd been with other guys before. Woah...

"So you've been with guys before?" I asked slowly. He looked down, sadly, and frowned.

"Just one..." he said. And the look in his eyes was pained. I didnt ask anymore. Then his head snapped up and his expression was serious. "You are a virgin right?" he asked, and I could tell he was hoping I'd say yes. I nodded. He sighed a sigh of relief. "Good, dont change that until you know your ready okay?" he pointed a finger at me as if he were my father.

"I wont," I said laughing. I didnt plan on it anytime soon. But the more I thought about it, the more I wondered why he'd asked me that. I looked down at him, about to ask him the same question. He was laying on his back, staring at the stars. His eyes distant, and his expression dazed. Beautiful. I lost my train of thought...

"Come on," he said sitting up, "we'd better get home before our parents have heart attacks," he stood up and held his hand out to me. I took it and pulled myself up, pecking him on the cheek when I did. I think we're together now...

He didnt let go of my hand, instead he twined our fingers together, and lightly kissed me again. Even though it was brief, it was still enough to give me butterflies. That was a yes.