Diary of a bad housewife

Diary of a bad housewife chapter 12

Chapter 12

"Mrs. James?"

"Yes?" My heart leaped to my throat.

"I am Thomas Dorsett, assistant to Sir Cecil Haroldson Rhodes."

I called my contact Harry so often, I nearly forgot his first name was Cecil.

"Mr. Dorsett, is Mr. Rhodes all right?"

"Well, yes. Unfortunately, he's detained in Customs. Ambassador Rotimi is with them now, but we have a tax problem declaring so much money in your country. One moment please."

He took out a Blackberry phone and pressed a couple of buttons. After a moment, he began speaking.

"Yes, sir. I extended her your apologies. Yes, sir, I'm with her now. No, sir, considering the obligations and the sums involved, I thought you should."

He handed the Blackberry to me. "Mr. Rhodes, madam."

I cupped the phone to my ear. "Hello?"

"Julia, my dear! How nice to hear your voice, so near, yet so far. We stumbled upon a tax problem with your customs officials, but our ambassador issued a letter of authority, certifying you pay a fraction of one per cent of the tax now and the remainder within ninety days. Is that acceptable to you?"

"Yes, but ... How ... How much?" I stuttered getting the words out.

"Only twenty-one thousand two hundred."

Oh, my God. Ninety-three million out of reach for a lack of twenty-one thousand dollars. Disappointment slapped me. For want of a nail the kingdom was lost. Tears dammed against my eyelids.

"I ... I'm sorry, Harry. I don't have twenty one thousand dollars."

"Do not worry, my dear lady. I entrusted with Mr. Dorsett a certified bank draft for one hundred thousand dollars, more than enough to cover it tomorrow."

"But, Harry, at this moment, I don't have twenty one thousand dollars."

"My dear Julia, how much do you have?"

"Only six thousand, roughly. That's if I can get it transferred."

"I'm afraid that won't do. How about credit cards?"

"I maxed out the only credit card we ..." I stopped, struck by a thought. "There's my husband's American Express." If I remembered right, a standard AmEx had no charge limit. "Do you need the actual card, or will the card numbers suffice?"

"I believe Tom there can deal with it. He'll work things out. Oh, one other thing: she's stepped away for the moment, but I believe Miss Schiffer wishes to ask if you'll help support our relief charities."

"Claudia Schiffer?" My jaw dropped. "Well, yes, of course, of course. It's the least I could do."

"Wonderful. Work with Tom Dorsett and we should have these pesky officials satisfied within the hour."

I handed Mr. Dorsett back his phone and repeated what Harry told me.

"Here is your certified bank draft for one hundred thousand, same as cash," he said. "In the lobby, I notice they have wi-fi." When I looked puzzled, he added, "Wireless connections for computers. We can adjourn to the lobby and conduct your credit card transfer over the internet."

As I rose to leave, I noticed the bartender shaking his head in what looked like disgust.

In the lobby, I read to Mr. Dorsett the American Express numbers, the expiration date, and the security code. Twenty-one thousand two hundred dollars. I savored the irony of using my husband's hidden account to win my own lottery. I'd let him twist for a day or two before revealing I hit the jackpot.