The Devil On Your Shoulder (an All Time Low/Jalex fanfic)

Chapter 2- I wanna be your lost boy, your last chance

Alex Gaskarth. The boy who had made me fall so hard, only to get my heartbroken.

"Alex!" The too familiar voice sounded, wrapping her arms around his perfection.

"Hey honey." His perfect husky voice had grinned, his beautiful grin. The grin that had took my breath away.

At first, I thought I could handle the boy of my dreams having a girl friend. But all the faith I had in myself dropped when they planted kisses on each others lips.

It took me months to get over Alex. Everytime I saw him in the corridor, I would think about the amazing time I had had with him. That day, that amazing day I had spent with him. And then the day after that. And the day after that.

His brilliant grin, his perfect, strong arms, wrapped around his new girl. It killed me. Everytime I saw them together, I died a little inside.

Alex and Lisa soon became our year's king and queen. They received crowns, and rewarded each other with unlimited kisses. Alex and Lisa was all that people talked about. It made my head explode.

But I couldn't blame Alex for picking Lisa over me.

Lisa was beautiful. She had brilliant, long, light brown hair. Her laugh and smile were perfect. Her skin tone matched his perfectly, both being absolutely flawless. She was around the same height as him, maybe a little smaller. She was skinny, she suited every colour, even red. She wore short skirts, which complemented her figure perfectly. She had curves in all the right places. She was perfect.

As for me, I wore my dark black messy hair with a red or black hat. My laugh was embarrasing, and my smile was nothing compared to Lisa's. I was far too pale and I had a few spots. Not a lot, but I still had them. I was about a head taller than him. I wore baggy clothes that hung over me as I walked. Some people even described me as 'too skinny'. I wasn't a girl, so I couldn't wear short skirts or tops that showed my clevage. 

Lisa came from a rich family, she didn't work, she had perfect grades.

I came from a poor family, I worked at my dad's bar most nights, leaving me with bags under my eyes most mornings. I wasn't nearly as smart as her. I didn't have perfect grades.

I'd never ever compared myself to anyone before. Before I met Alex, I had been happy with who I was. Now I wanted nothing more than to be Lisa. Ha, ha. I wanted to be a girl.

The Alex heart-ache, as I liked to call it, lasted way longer than it should have. 6 months went by, and I still came home from school, tears running down my cheeks and music blaring so loud I couldn't hear anything after wards. I worked in my dad's bar more and more hours, trying to forget about him and his perfect girl friend.

Nothing worked.

Until, the school expelled me.

-

*Flashback*

"Jack! Wait up!" I'd heard the only good thing in my life shout. I slowed down, letting him catch up with me. He flung his arms around me, hugging my tightly. I grinned, feeling the warm of his lips on my cheek. "I have missed you so much."

I smiled at him, turning my body in his grip so I was facing him. "I missed you too." I told him, letting my warm breath reach his lips. He let out one of his perfect grins. "How was Vegas then?! What'd your parents say?"

Alex bit his lip, removing his eyes from mine. "I, um,"

"You did tell them, right?" 

"Jack, I'm, I'm not ready yet, I'm not sure, my mind's a mess."

"What do you mean you're not sure?! You're not sure about you and me?" Hurt flooded my stomach and eyes, and I knew he could see it. I pushed back from him, leaving me cold and out of love, once again.

"Jack, I will, I will, just, not now, not yet."

"When then?!" I was shouting now, blood boiling. "I can't do this anymore, it's all on your terms. What about me, what about what I want?"

"All I want is you to be happy, you know that. Don't do this to me."

"I've waited 6 months, six fucking months." I told him, tears coming uncontrollably.

"Don't cry, Jack. Please."

"You're always saying you'd do anything for me, it's all bullshit, isn't it? You're scared that Josh will find out, don't even deny it. I don't understand why you care so much about people finding out, I don't care. I love you. That's all that matters."

He moved forward, taking my hands in his own. I hit them away. I was more than pissed.

*Another flashback*

"Hey mom, dad,  this is Jack." Alex grinned, showing me off to his parents proudly. 

Alex's dad stepped forward. He was about the same height as Alex, and had very little hair left on his head. He smiled at me, shaking my hand. "Nice to meet you, Jack. We've heard lots about you."

I grinned widely. 'We've heard lots about you'. "Nice to meet you too, Mr. Gaskarth."

"Call me Peter." He told me, nodding his head and stepping back from me.

Alex's mom was smaller than Alex, and she had shoulder length brown hair. Her smile lit up the room, much like Alex's did. I saw a lot of features from her that resembled Alex. I smiled, putting my hand out for her to shake when she pulled me into a tight hug.

Alex hadn't really had much friends over in the past. He had a lot of friends, but not many close ones. Not ones like me. 

I stayed for dinner that night, and me and his parents really seemed to hit it off. Alex loved his parents, he really did, and every time he spoke to them love filled his eyes. But something was weird, he was weird around them. Sometimes he'd be really happy and bubbly, but more often than not he was off with them. He would give them one worded answers and speak in a low pitched voice.

Peter was hilarious. Me and him hit it off the best. We'd make side jokes to everything Alex and his mom said. I could see where Alex got his sense of humor, but he was definitely more like his mother than his father. Isobel was kind and warm, and so was Alex, when you got to know him, although, on the outside, he was cold and scary.

Later on that night me and Alex shared one of our best talks we've ever had. He told me about his brother, how he killed himself when Alex was only young and how his parents had never properly gotten over it. I held him as he cried and told me more and more about it.

I told him about my parents, and how they'd sprung it on me that they were separating. I know it wasn't the worst problem in the world, but it broke my heart. I couldn't imagine a life with two separate homes and two parents who didn't love each other. My parent's marriage was one of the only reasons I believed in love, and now that it was over, I felt like I could never truly love. Every time one of them entered my room I prayed it was to tell me they'd sorted things out and they were staying together. It never was. My father soon left, taking everything with him. I told him I never wanted to make the same mistakes as they did, I never wanted to do that to my kids.

We shared most things about our lives, happy and sad. I told him that my favourite movie was Home Alone and he told me he loved Disney more than anything. He told me that he knew I was gay, and he thought it was really cool. "If anyone gives you shit for it, you know where I am right?" He'd told me and I'd grinned at him, nodding. He was more amazing than I could have ever imagined.

There was only one thing I hadn't shared with Alex yet.

My cuts.

___

All Time Low's new song in the bar over there >>>

It's leaked, I know, I feel bad for listening to it but it's so amazing, seriously if you haven't listened to it yet you definitely should! Anyway, hope you enjoyed this chapter:))