Guide To Gaining Confidence

⇝ bleeding colors ♡

It was beautiful that she didn't cry;

she bled colours.

She bled colours through tears because they did not know where else to go to. She had no confidence to let it show.

It?..

It was the passion, talents, and skills she had kept in her mind, body, and soul.

It didn't take long for her to completely bury what she could do, for she'd taken the hand of a lost friendㅡ fear. Her passion, talents, and skills, it's buried in fear.

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Let me first tell you that it is okay to feel this way. Everyone will loose their confidence at one point, but will soon regain it back with more confidence than what they've initially had. Hang in there. ♡
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Ciara was that girl everyone knew as nice, kind, and a little drunk-like when she talks. She's the girl who'd put others first because she valued her friendships more than her needs. Caring, passionate, and somewhat loud, she gained popularity and friends. She thought that she could keep doing this, and be happy. But.. Why couldn't she?

Yes, her laugh and smiles, they were sincere, but only so that the other party would feel appreciated. They were never sincere for her ownself.

I, Ciara, pronounced as "Keer-ah", have this passion for helping people, to play instruments, do art, act, play sports, but no one knew.

It was due to her peers and family, that she soon believed she could not do anything. She kept her hopes and dreams a secret, due to the fact that she was afraidㅡ afraid to be the centre of attention, afraid to be the weird kid that dreams too much.

Every time they wanted to show, she'd keep pushing her colours back in the inner core of her body, mind and soul. It became overwhelming, overbearing. She felt like she was at the edge of bursting into tears.

"No.. I can't cryㅡ never."

It was finally her senior year in high school. Will it be her last year to waste?

"So," Ms. Elena started, "Who is up to register for the all-arts club?"

All-arts club: Everything from the Arts streamㅡ Singing, Drawing, Designing, Sports, Performing Arts, etc.

The usual fourteen out of the thirty students from our class raised their hands. Looking down nervously, I raised my hand.

And immediately, I broke down crying.

I bled the colours I'd never displayed outside of myself.

Ciara had never truly showed a bit of passion she had until now. Little did anyone knew that just by raising her hands as a sign of interest, could release the overflowing passion kept inside of her for years.

And she realized, that wasn't so bad after all.

Even though, my colours had to be shown this wayㅡ with the simplest actionㅡ raising your hand, I'm happy.

The day she realized that her fears were just fears, not something that's supposed to destroy her, was the day she changed slowly, then all at once.

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"Happiness earned through deceit always comes to an end."

"Burying the truth doesn’t make it go away. It’s bound to come out into the world in some way, shape or form whether it’ll be pretty or heinous”

ㅡPinocchio (korean drama)

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One day, you're going to explode in the most unique colors you can find; and you'll look back and ask yourself, "why was I so afraid?"

Self-acceptance is important. Don't be afraid, or ashamed for what you want in life.

Physical perfection is an impossible beauty standard.

There’s beauty in simply being content with yourself just the way you are.

But, if you're ever the one that has to bleed colours first before painting them on yourself, just know that it is okay. Everyone's journey is beautiful in its own way.

Stay strong everyone xx ♡

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pas·sion

ˈpaSHən/

noun

1. strong and barely controllable emotion that you shouldn't hide.
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let it shine ♡