Vengeance Of Love (Camren) (G!P)

Chapter 10.

I sniff, "Why?"

"Because you're not hurt Lauren...you're broken," Dinah whispers, not meeting my eyes this time. "I'm sorry to tell you that, but it's true. You're angry, ashamed, broken, confused, and it's hard for you to accept that. I felt like I could get better but you feel like you have nothing else to live for, because you've actually been hurt for years, you've been abused of and taken advantage of and it's not child's play unfortunately."

Part of me was hoping that she could sugar coat some of her words because deep down they stung. But at the same time, I was thankful that a friend like Dinah was the one to tell me what I needed to do or why I felt a certain way. I wouldn't be able to take any of this shit from anyone else but it's Dinah, she's gone through some of the things I went through and she understands me somehow.

I'm able to take cruel words in and not let them affect me, but when it comes to the truth, it bothers me more than actual lies about me. I take a deep breath and let out a shaky sigh, "It is so hard, Dinah...sometimes I grow so weak that I wonder why I'm still letting myself fall for it."

Dinah stares at me for a couple of seconds and she sighs, "Society will take a good look at both us and think we need help, that we need to spend every second of our lives taking pills or going to therapy because we're not right in the head. I take a good look at you now and wonder if you're missing something in your life that can help you move on. That can help you realize that your life is more than suffering and despair. You just wait."

I feel my temple pulse slightly and my stomach begins to churn a bit, my body just tensing at her uneasy words. I usually got this sick every time I arrived to this place, and maybe that's why I felt so queasy and unsafe here. I look over at Dinah and nod, thanking her for her honest opinion before offering a quick hug. The blonde returns the small gesture and pulls away with a crooked grin.

"You know..." I begin slowly. "As soon as I enter those doors, I become a patient. And every other normal person in there will look down at my wristband and look at me with either pity or try to distance themselves from me because I'm sick. I can be 'dangerous'..."

Dinah chuckles and shakes her head. "The same goes for me...except everyone around me will stare at my wrists to see if I'm a cutter because my tag reads 'depression'."

I give her a dry grin and shake my head, wondering why a place like this would make someone feel so insecure and unsafe when it only offered help. I bite my lip and take a deep breathe before unlocking the car doors, taking a step out of the car before turning to shut the door behind me. I lock the car and walk around it to meet Dinah, who's already inspecting the building with narrowed eyes.

"I go to the Treatment center in Downtown, since last year." Dinah mumbles as we walk down the sidewalk leading towards the entrance of the large building. It was only my second time attending a therapy session and my first encounter with the lady inside wasn't too friendly. I hated every second it. Why did she have the right to know about the things going on in my life? Why did I have to tell a complete stranger that I was abused as a child, or that I'm abused now? Why does she have to know my mother has died?

"Sucks, right?" Dinah breaks me out of my angered thoughts. "You walk into this place nervous, confused, or maybe even happy that you're getting some form of help and as soon as you overthink it, you're angry that you're just another patient. That they don't give a shit about you or your problems, but you still have to tell them about it."

"You have no idea," I sigh.

"Oh trust me, I do." DJ teases, offering a small smile which I can only return. I look down at my lap and laugh softly, loving the fact that I could at least share similar feelings and ideas with each other without feeling like we don't understand each other. If I were to tell someone else about it, I'd only get a pitied response or a "I wish I knew how you felt" bullshit.