oneirataxia [completed]

oneirataxia

"you know i'm not really... real, right?"

"of course you are, don't be silly. you're the realest person i know."

"not like that, phil. i mean, i don't exist."

"dan, you always say that. we're talking right now, right? and i'm real. so that means you must be real too." phil paused for a moment and the room echoed in silence. "my mum says you're not real." phil looked down at his hands sadly, then added, "but that isn't true."

dan shook his head in defeat. "fine, phil. believe what you want to." phil smiled victoriously. he was always right.

"do you want to play a game?" phil asked, seconds later, as if the conversation they had had previously hadn't happened at all.

dan smiled. "sure."

phil moved the monopoly piece for dan, as usual, since dan's hand just went right through them. 

phil always liked to play as the dog and dan played as the thimble, as it made phil laugh because of how ridiculous it was.

"who would want to play as a thimble?" phil had said the first time he and dan played monopoly together.

"um, me, obviously," dan said and phil immediately erupted into fits of giggles. as tough as it was, dan kept a straight face. 

"what's so funny, phil? i want to play as the thimble." phil had the biggest smile on his face and shook his head, placing the thimble on the board. "fine, but i'm playing as the dog, you weirdo."

ever since then, dan played as the thimble, just to see phil smile. every time they played, phil would ask dan what piece he wanted, even though he already knew the answer. dan would point to the thimble with a fake serious expression on his face. a huge smile would spread across phil's face and every now and then, a small laugh would slip out. dan loved seeing phil so happy.

so this time, like all the others, dan was the thimble. 

"hey phil," dan looked up from his fingernails, which he had been picking at. "do you think we could maybe spice things up this game?"

"what do you mean?"

"can my thimble possibly wear a hat?" dan pointed to the hat game piece and phil laughed so hard that he started to cry and dan couldn't hold his laughter in anymore either and soon, both of them were teary-eyed messes on the floor.

"why was that so funny to me? that wasn't even that funny," phil tried to get a hold of himself.

"i wasn't trying to be funny," dan let out a small giggle and wiped his eye. "i just want jonathan the thimble to look super snazzy with his special hat."

phil sat up. "is that his name then? jonathan?"

"yes, what's wrong with that?"

"nothing," phil giggled. "as long as the dog can be named susan."

"what if it's a boy dog?" dan asked, trying not to lose himself in the ridiculousness of their conversation again.

"then his name will be susan anyway."

"what kind of boy is named susan?" dan laughed.

"i'll have you know i've met loads of boys named susan."

"of course you have," dan giggled. phil started laughing too.

"so is that a yes for the hat?" phil nodded slowly and reached over to the hat but instead of placing it on top of jonathan the thimble, he threw it at dan. it went right through him but dan didn't care. he wasn't letting phil off that easy.