Let Me Go ✔️

Chapter 12

I took a step toward him and raised my hand to get him to calm down. "Silas, please." I began. "We're just hanging out." I told him in a comforting voice.

"That's all you think this is, Nova." He told me in his parental voice. "All he's doing is trying to get in bed with you."

Kyle took a few quick steps toward Silas. "That's not true, at all." Kyle told him firmly. "I'm crazy about your sister, okay? All I do is think about her, talk about her, wish I was with her—I want her to be mine." A giant smile washed over my face, but Kyle didn't turn around and continued to look at Silas.

Silas shook his head. "No, you're just another pig." He snapped. "Just another carbon copy of Jude." Silas added in a cold voice. Kyle didn't say anything back to that. In fact, it was quiet for what felt like an eternity.

"Take it back." Kyle growled. "I'm nothing like that piece of shit."

Silas crossed his arms. "Really?" He began in a condescending tone. "You're good looking—like him. You're a smooth talker—like him. You're out gallivanting with a girl in the night, most likely just trying to have sex with her—like him." Silas said. "What makes you so different from him?"

Kyle huffed. "I don't rape and beat girls, for one thing." His voice told me he was beyond pissed off right now. "I'm not a liar, or a cheater—I don't trick people into thinking I'm something that I'm not." He told him firmly. "And, oh, you should know that me and your sister haven't even kissed; so, slow your roll."

Silas looked back at me. "Is that true?" He asked. "Is any of what he said true?"

I looked over at Kyle and smiled—which he returned. Then, I looked back at Silas. "Every word."

Silas looked down and sighed; seeming to accept this. "What about you and Jude?" He asked, not looking up from the ground. The tone of his voice told me he really didn't want to hear my answer. "You know what he is, Nova." He added and looked up at me. "Everyone knows what he is. So, please tell me you aren't seeing him, too."

There was a long silence. I decided the lying needed to end. I was being lied too by someone, so I needed to step up and be the honest one. "Yes, I am." I answered. Silas dropped his flashlight, turned around, and placed his hands on the top of his end in one swift motion. I ran up to my brother. "I'm sorry, Silas. I am, but he isn't what everyone thinks he is." I assured him. "He's sweet, he's kind, he's caring, and he doesn't do the horrible things everyone says he does. I've been with him for a while and he's been nothing like you described that day in the cafeteria."

He stopped moving for a long moment, and then turned around and faced me. His eyes flashed with many different emotions—anger, terror, sadness. "He's hasn't raped you, right?" He asked in a factual voice, like he was sure of my answer.

"Of course not. I wouldn't be standing here talking him up if he did." I replied with a smirk.

"Then..." He paused and shook his head. "Nova..." He paused again, my name coming out of him as a whisper. "Did you have sex with him?" The way he asked this question sounded like he was about to throw up.

"What?!" Kyle and I exclaimed at the same time.

"Please, just answer before I start having a panic attack." Silas said in a desperate voice.

I shook my head. "Silas, I don't think that's any of your business." I retorted.

Silas grabbed my arm. "Yes or no." He said in a low voice.

"Nova, just tell him you haven't." Kyle said from behind me. "She's a virgin, she told me." Kyle told Silas in a reassuring voice.

Silas didn't look upset by Kyle knowing this information, but he nodded his head in relief. "Okay, but just answer my question—and please be honest with me." I could lie—in fact lying was probably the smartest thing I could do at the moment. I wanted to be truthful with everyone in light of all the lying going on; but this would hurt both Silas and Kyle. "Nova." Silas said in a low voice when I hadn't responded. "Your silence in not reassuring."

I shook my head to get out of my thoughts. "Sorry," I replied. "No, I haven't had sex with Jude." I answered with the best smile I could muster. There were sighs of relief from both guys.

Silas looked to be on cloud 9. "Okay, but one more thing;" He spoke. "What did you mean then when you said he doesn't do the horrible things everyone says he does?"

I shrugged. "Well, I just meant he hasn't raped or beat me." I replied plainly. The correct answer would be—he hasn't ditched me after having sex with him.

Silas nodded in understanding. "Okay, now that that's been taken care of;" He looked back at Kyle and pointed at him. "I do not approve of this. I hate you less than I do Jude, so I'm not going to forbid you from seeing her; but just know that I don't want you dating her." He told him. "And if you break her heart, I'll break your bones." Silas told him with a smile. Kyle nodded in understanding. Truth be told, I think Kyle would win in a fight between the two of them—but Silas might if he was angry enough.

I held up a finger. "How did you know we were out here?" I asked.

Silas rolled his eyes. "We live in the same hall. I was out going to the bathroom when I saw him sneaking out of his room with a flashlight; so I followed him." He stated in a flat voice. "Had a feeling it had something to do with you." Silas said and shone the flashlight on me. "But I'm going to reluctantly leave you two alone, because I'm a great brother." He said and then smiled. "But mostly because I'm dead tired."

I smiled at him and wrapped my arms around his neck. "Goodnight."

He chuckled. "Goodnight; bane of my existence." I backed out of the hug and pushed him away. Silas looked back at Kyle. "Night, quarterback." He said with a goodbye salute. Kyle shot him a wave and he left.

I looked back over at Kyle and he was smiling sweetly at me. Guilt swept all over my body as I looked at him look at me like I was his entire world. "Kyle..." I began in a low voice and made my way over to him. "I have a confession to make, and I'm so sorry."

He let out a deep sigh and nodded. "Okay." He replied in a brave voice. "What is it?"

I intertwined my fingers with his and closed my eyes. "I did have sex with Jude." I felt Kyle's hand tense up in mine. I opened my eyes and I could see the hurt written all over his face. "I didn't lie when I said I was a virgin, though... it was after that." I said in a quiet voice.

He shook his head. "Nova..." He whispered.

"I'm sorry!" I said in a shrill voice. "I was confused and I didn't know if I wanted to be with him or you."

He looked down. "Did you plan on choosing him?" He asked. "You said you thought you had your mind made up." He let go of my hand. "Did you choose him initially?" I nodded. "But you aren't sure anymore?" I nodded again. "Do I have a fighting chance or should I just drop out now?" His tone grew louder as his question went on.

"You do have a chance. A big one at that." I told him and placed my hand on his chest. "You're very much in the running, but he is too..."

He nodded. "I'm in." He said with a smile. "Bring it, Simon."