Adopted by BTS

Midnight Blue , Midnight memories

         The empty room was too cold to sleep in.  My mind would wander over and over again to the car crash. 

         "eomma! appa! it's snowing!"  The dark night sky would make the moon and snow shine as little snowflakes surrounded Seoul.

        "Yes Sorin, it is snowing." "Beautiful... right?" My mom would say to me also very interested in the cities snowy scenery. But all of a sudden the car started to swerve forcefully from Left to Right.

        "Appa! what's wrong with the car?!" I was starting to get really scared, my mom was trying to calm me down but what I didn't know was that night was the last time I would ever be with my parents.  The car  finally made it's last frightening swerve in to the freeway railing. The car started to tumble down a ditch, my mom was holding me close as she could because she was in the passenger seat.

         Once the car made a stop my head slammed the seat my mother was sitting in. The car was rolled over and my parents were nearly unconscious.

"Eomma! Appa!..." I said while crying, everything was falling apart, I couldn't hear anything or do anything. It was like time had just...stopped.

"Sorin...." my mom said while choking on her last breaths. "Sorin...we love you...and we always will..."

~

There I was again. Staring at the old blade that my skin was too familiar with. It was a hobby of mine. It felt as if I was born for hating myself. My parents death took away my happiness, I was only happy with them.

This place wasn't too bad, I had no friends, no roommates, nothing. No one talks to me and I didn't talk to them, I didn't want friends, I didn't think anyone would understand me.

I need to get out of here... I would say to myself mentally as I walked out of my bricked small room. I stumbled off my bed and out the door to seek for fresh air.

Another hobby of mine was going outside when things were tough, when I doubted myself, or even when I was just bored. It made me feel as if I could talk to my parents, like they could see and feel my pain.

~

Of course... Midnight blue, one of my favorite colors.  The color made me feel like it could connect to my feelings. The midnight sky was as deep and dark as the ocean. The thought irks me as I remember my nightmare of the accident. I really miss my parents, they were my everything, they genuinely loved and cared for me. I don't know why but I feel like I always knew that my parents were the only ones I would have. And my feeling must have been right since I'm in an adoption center and no one has adopted and kept me yet.

            But I get along with the people here. I just don't "acquaint" with them that well. No one here gives me any problems. Maybe they do give me problems, but I just don't realize because I have too many of my own. I don't know really anything anymore I'm beginning to hate myself more and more everyday. No one cares for me anymore, not even my relatives that could have taken me in. I've just lost hope into myself.

             I should get back inside now, before I get in trouble. I think I've done enough walking and thinking. Even though I know that I will just keeping thinking about the accident.

~

I lay on my cold and rusted bed while listening to music. I like to listen to American or English Language music.  Because I was born in LA but moved here 1 year before that accident. But sometimes I would listen to KPOP. I don't really like to obsess over KPOP that much because most groups don't write their music, or most of their songs are about cheesy and cringey love. But one of the groups I do tolerate (Stan) is BTS. I'm not a ARMY or anything, but I really like their music. It has meaning about how bad society and the world really is. One of my favorite songs from BTS is Tomorrow, it talks about how you should never think that it's the end for you, like you shouldn't just give up on life.

~
      I finally decide to go to sleep while listening to Tomorrow. Speaking of "Tomorrow", adoption day will be held Tomorrow, I don't really want to attend because I know I won't be adopted but it's my job.

~
(A/N)
I don't really want to leave a big authors note because I want to publish this book really badly, and I want to get started on the second chapter. Thank you so much for reading please vote and comment you opinions and suggestions so I can connect with you all more to make my book even better!☺️ Happy (late) New year to you all! I hope your 2017 will be filled with Happiness and blessed moments😘❤️❤️ Annyeong! ~ Amina