Promises

1

Sitting...thinking...watching...

I watch the busy cars stream past my bedroom window as I think about what I should write next. You know those few seconds where you blank out and don't feel present? You feel absent but too present at the same time? Those moments scare me most, I feel like I'm never coming back and I'm just falling into a hole with no end. Just dropping...falling...dropping.

"Mel come down for dinner!" I heard my mom yell but I wont feel complete until I finish this chapter, just finish this chapter and then you can go downstairs. I carry on writing and following my nose as I type. Not really taking note of what I'mwriting...just typing what flows out of my mind in that second I guess.

I finish the chapter and head down for dinner out of my attic where I sleep. Kind of like a basement except its the highest room and I sleep in it. Plus, basements are way too scary to sleep in. I sigh and carry on walking towards the kitchen, " Melanie where have you been? I called you fifteen minutes ago!"

"Sorry mom I was just-"

"Writing? You really need to stop writing on this pad app, it wont do you any good and people aren't reading it if you haven't noticed. Try a new hobby, why don't you come to the pageant on Saturday? I have been asked to be one of the judges. I can buy you a dress and everything! Or maybe more than one dress! Two! Three! Or we could switch up your entire closet if you like?" My mom asks with hope in her eyes as she eats her pasta.

"Firstly the app is Wattpad and secondly I'm good thanks mom, I like my current closet"

"What? Black black and black? Honey, don't you think its turning to be a bit goth?" she gestures towards my current outfit as she sips her water and giggles.

I look down at my clothes. Black Nikes, ripped jeans and tank top. Finished off with dark makeup. Its not that bad, and even if it was bad to everyone else I'd still like it. "Whatever." I say and walk off.

"Your dinner is in the kitchen but you're going to have to heat it up since you took such a long time to come down sta-"

"Okay mom I get it! I was busy! Whatever, I'm going to see Dustin." I say and without her approval, I storm out the house and slam the door. I wasn't really planning on going to his house but I guess I could since I'm out already. Before I head to his house, I stop at the nearest park for a smoke.

After finishing my cigarette, I start my walk towards Dustin's house. Something feels wrong, not physically but just something feels negative about my personality. I'm sure it'll blow over. Time to go to Dustin's house.

I knock on the door and see his mom opening the door with tears in her eyes. Oh no...not again.

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Hey guys, I'm Jenna and ill try my best to update as much as often. xxx