Spiral

Cold

Syler spent the time between the encounter with the maggots and the time that he had to leave for work wasting time on the internet, trying to forget the feeling of the maggots pulsing through his veins, but that was never an easy feeling to forget about anyway. Syler would get the shakes every couple of minutes, he'd shiver, and continue. He just wanted to finally leave the house, so the feelings could go for a couple of hours. Syler just wanted peace for a little, just so he could be at ease for a couple minutes. Paranoia, especially his prolonged paranoia caused uncomfortable heart palpitations, and he didn't know if they were even healthy. The clock finally hit 2:30, and Syler decided to make his way over to his work. Zane was usually there early as well, so Syler knew he wouldn't be alone, which he was thankful for. He grabbed his keys and he said goodbye to his mom so he could let her know where he was going. He walked out to the driveway, and got into his car. His heart had finally found a somewhat normal heart rate by now, which Syler was thankful for, as the palpitations were starting to cause severe discomfort to him. He turned the keys and got the car started, then he drove off to the building where he was due to work at.

Syler arrived at 2:57, and Zane walked out once he saw Syler's car, which he was very much familiar with. Syler watched Zane walk out. He got out of his car to greet him.
"Yo dude, where've you been? I missed you." Zane asked, concerned, and he embraced Syler.

"I've been busy I guess." Syler said, trying to come up with an excuse for his couple of episodes over the past few days.

"Busy with what?" Zane asked, and Syler shrugged.
"I found a girl." Syler said, his face turning red as he remembered the night before.

"Is it that Lauren chick?" Zane asked, curiously. Syler nodded.

"Yeah, I kissed her for the first time yesterday." Syler said, his voice had lowered as he said it.
"Really? Next thing you know, you two will be getting it on or something. I'm proud of you for finding someone. That's hard to do." Zane said, and the two walked into the building.
"Yeah I guess. She's pretty, that's for sure. I don't have the guts to ask if she's a virgin or anything though. It all happened so fast. We had just met a few days ago, and we've already had our first kiss." Syler awkwardly confessed, and Zane held onto Syler's shoulder. It was a friendly gesture, it was to show Syler that he could trust Zane. Zane knew that Syler needed reassuring. He knew that Syler didn't trust easily, so he'd make sure that he let Syler know every once in awhile that Syler could trust him.
"Sometimes it just clicks. People can just click, sometimes it takes ages. You got lucky my dude." Zane said, and Syler agreed.

"Yeah, I'm grateful for that. I'm just so bad at communicating, so I was surprised as to how well I talked with Lauren when I first met her." Syler said, and Zane walked over to where he was assigned to work.

"I gotta start my shift. I'll clock you in as well dude." Zane said and the two parted ways. Syler was working at the register. It wasn't something that he liked to do, but he was thankful for the fact that he did get paid, so he stuck with it. He didn't enjoy talking with people, but he forced himself to do it. Syler needed the money more than his own comfort, as the money bought him his comfort, which was cigarettes. His only true vice when he started to stress.

Syler's shift dragged on, he was set to work until six, but three hours had never felt so long to him. The clock moved at a snail's pace, but it eventually did hit six, and Syler clocked out as quickly as he could, that place seemed to cause him to hallucinate. The corners seemed to be crawling with creatures, the shadows seemed to be observing Syler and his mannerisms.

Syler drove home, and the minute he had walked inside he smelt food, which, like it seemed to always do, made him gag. He put the lanyard that held his keys with the others. Syler tried to sneak past his mother, so he made sure to be as silent as possible so he could get out of eating dinner, he knew that he'd not be able to keep much down after the encounter that morning. Syler had made it almost fully up the stairs when he heard her call.

"I have dinner, come get some." She said, and Syler sighed. He slumped over to the table, and he greeted Jess as well as his mom.
"Do I have to eat now?" He asked, and his mom sighed.
"Yes Syler." She said, so he grabbed a plate, put some rice and a scrambled egg on it. His mom eyed his plate. Syler was aware that she was judging his choices.
"Is that all you want?" She asked, and Syler nodded.
"Yeah, is that an issue?" Syler asked, and his mom quickly shook her head.
"No, as long as you have something." She said, and Syler commenced to eating the rice on his plate. He tried to look away, as the rice did remind him of the maggots. He just forced the rice down his throat. He tried not to heave after every bite he forced down. Syler did eventually manage to choke down the rice, and he ate the scrambled egg. He wasn't opposed to the egg, the texture was decent, and it didn't make him gag after every bite, which he was thankful for. Syler could feel his stomach churning, it wasn't pleasant. He hated the feeling of the food inside of his stomach. He began to feel sick, and he knew that the only option was to throw up. He didn't like the idea, but he wasn't opposed to it either. Syler hastily placed his empty plate in the sink and walked upstairs into the bathroom. His heart was beating faster now, and he dreaded this. He locked the bathroom door and pulled up the toilet seat. He chugged a glass of water and then leaned over the toilet. He pressed on his stomach and began to flex them in different ways to enforce puking.

This took Syler a while, but eventually he did manage to puke up the food. His nose crinkled at the vile smell and he gagged again because of the sour taste that coated his mouth now. He sighed. Syler didn't like this, and whenever he did it, he just hated it more and more. He cleaned out his mouth, and popped some chewing gum into his mouth to make sure the sour taste wouldn't haunt him. He opened the bathroom window again so that the smell of puke wouldn't sift throughout the whole house.

Syler's throat burned. He felt tired and his heart ached. He hated this, badly, but he knew that stopping wasn't going to happen anytime soon for him. He was addicted to self-sabotage, and if making himself puke was sabotaging himself, he was all for it. Anything to take his mind off of the hooded creature and the fact that his dreams and his reality weren't separate anymore. He could feel himself losing touch with the ability to separate his dreams from his reality. Syler started to fear himself.

He wanted to at least have a life with Lauren, even if it was small. He wanted her really. He started to get these feelings about her. He was attracted to her body, the way it moved, the way it looked and curved in just the right places. He wanted her face, he wanted to kiss her. He wanted to have her, in a more sensual manner. Syler never felt this way about anyone, but he knew it was bound to happen. He knew his teenage brain would get these feelings, even with his dreams and his thoughts, and Syler didn't know how to feel.

Syler wanted to live. He wanted to have some sort of life before everything gets ruined. The smell of puke started to clear out, and Syler was thankful for that, as puke wasn't a pleasant smell in his opinion. Syler opened up the window in his bedroom and then he lit up a cigarette to try and wash out the bad taste of the puke with the bad taste of the cigarette. He had many different poisons, but smoking was the one that he counted on most.

Syler texted Lauren. He had this lust for her and her body, it was a sexual feeling that he couldn't shake, and he hoped the next time she visited, he'd be able to fulfill it, or at least tell her about it. Syler took another deep inhale of his cigarette and exhaled. He swore he could hear the shadows whispering now, but what they were saying, he couldn't make out.