Spiral

Deeper

"I met a girl." He confessed, and Zane looked surprised.
"I thought you weren't straight, my life is changed." Zane remarked and Syler shrugged.
"I'm not, I just, I really like her." Syler said, and Zane sat on the couch again.
"What did she look like?" Zane asked and Syler tried to remember her appearance with as much detail as he could.
"She had pastel blue hair, and a pixie cut, it was really pretty, and her face had freckles covering it. She had a septum piercing and her ears were stretched. She was pretty, ok." Syler said, and his cheeks turned red.
"You ever liked a girl before?" Zane asked, after observing how awkward Syler was talking about this, and Syler shook his head.

"This is my first time." He confessed and Zane stood up, as he had some more experience with girls than Syler.
"I can guide you then. What did you two do?" Zane asked.

"We met while I was taking a walk, I bumped into her and then she asked for a cigarette, so I gave her one, and that's how we started to talk." Syler explained.

"Ah, that's always a classic, bumping into each other." Zane retorted and Syler continued explaining.

"She then observed my appearance, and then asked about music, we were walking, and then I invited her home. We listened to some more music, and just talked about stuff." Syler explained.
"Do you feel a connection to her?" Zane asked, and Syler nodded.

"That's what's confusing me, I feel a connection to her, and not just a normal connection, it is romantic, I feel romance towards her." Syler said, his voice was a little shaky. Zane laughed.
"This is normal dude, relax, sounds like you got a crush on her. Let it run it's course, don't give up on her." Zane said, and Syler took a deep breath.

"I've just never felt this before, it's such an alien feeling." Syler explained, and Zane chuckled.
"Says the kid who feels maggots in his skin and sees shadows." Zane retorts to Syler.

"I know, I know, I don't know, my brain sort of fears connection I guess. It's just that everyone, well almost everyone I connect with will leave me in some way, and I hate it." Syler said, and he flung himself on his couch, his legs too exhausted to carry him any longer. He hadn't realized how tired he was lately, and he blamed it on his sleep schedule, but he knew deep down it was because he could barely eat from the fear it caused his thoughts. He believed that any sort of meal would feed the maggots that he swore crawled within his skin, well it was either that or the dreams just made him lose his appetite. Zane had observed Syler's habits around food, as well as everyone else, and everyone swore Syler had some sort of eating disorder, and Syler denied it, he wasn't trying to lose weight at all, he wished he could eat, he would just lose his appetite so much that he rarely did find a reason to eat. Zane had picked up on this by now.

"Did you eat dinner yet dude?" Zane asked, out of the blue, and Syler shook his head.
"We're eating when mom and Jess get back home." Syler explained, and Zane sighed.

"Have you eaten yet though?" Zane asked and Syler nodded.

"Cereal and a sandwich." Syler told Zane. Zane shook his head.

"Dude, the reason you're having issues standing is because you're smoking too much and eating too little." Zane said, and Syler shook his head in defense.

"What does smoking have to do with any of this?" He asked, sort of offended to Zane's calling out of his one true comfort.

"It ruins you man, like I swear you smoke a pack or more daily." Zane said, his voice started to get more assertive, which startled Syler. He had never fought with Zane, and this was scaring him really.
"Look, I'm sorry I'm a mess, I'm sorry, please don't argue with me, I don't do well with yelling." Syler said, and Zane nodded in understanding.