Dream of This

[Seven]

"Mari?" Molly let the magic continue to rise as she advanced towards me. She looked like an adult trying to placate a small child. "You need to control it, you need to relax and calm down." Her eyes looked wild and bright full of confusion and fear.

"Dammit, I'm trying. I know I'm suppose to control it but I can't." I screamed out, the desperation dripping from each word. I needed to restrain the light, I couldn't hurt Molly. "You need to get away from me. I don't want to hurt you either, please go." I was begging at this point because when I was upset, the magic was worse.

"Shit, you're not trained, so I know this is hard, but you have to focus and calm yourself. Your emotions control the magic." Her light changed, turning into a subtle gold color while shifting from the arcs to a full body haze. It was like the light adapted to protect rather than fight. Nothing would slip past her barrier.

"See what I did, it doesn't have to be destructive. Focus on my voice and breath slower." I watched her close her eyes and take a deep inhale then a loud exhale just like the woman from my dreams had.
Just like Erik had tried to calm me. "It doesn't work Molly. Get away from me before I hurt you. I never meant to hurt Erik either. I don't know what's happening."

"You won't hurt me." I tried to listen to her words about deep breaths and strong exhales. How to free the mind and regain control. This light magic doesn't control me. I control it. It's mine to manipulate and mine alone to master. The heightened rush across my body numbed. I missed the feeling, but I felt normal again.

"What am I?" I couldn't say what was happening but this, this light was something. Something beautiful and magical.

"You're a Light Witch." With that, she dropped all her magic and fell on the floor beside where I had slumped down moments before. We sat there catching what balance we could.

I nodded my head then bent forward to rest it in my hand. I could still feel the lingering effects of what I did. Or what I was becoming. Who I am, I suppose was most apt. "You're a Light Witch too?" I asked, though I already knew the answer. She held the same light as I did but with far better precision.

"Yes, though unlike you, I'm trained." She rolled her eyes and fell back. She was always so dramatic. I couldn't help I wasn't trained. I didn't even know what I was. Somehow, for some reason I was blocked of my magic until now.

"It's not like I remembered!"

She nodded towards my hands. When I looked down, they were glowing red again. I let out a growl. I couldn't stop it from happening. "It happens when you feel strong emotions. Your magic is no longer suppressed. You died that night with Luke and the magic broke free." Her solemn words tugged on me.
So I needed to control my emotions? That seemed like the most impossible of feats at the moment. To tick off each thing: my husband is dead. My child is missing. I killed a man. I have magic. How I'm supposed to control my emotions? Fuck if I knew.

"Let's go make coffee and go over a plan." Molly pulled herself from the floor and reached a hand towards me. I put my hand in hers and lifted myself from the doubt and walked out of the bedroom with my best hope. I would find Gracie because the one and only thing I knew for certain in this world was—I couldn't fail.

**

"Have you always known I was Light Witch but had my powers blocked?" I asked Molly as she walked us back into the kitchen. Something strange tugs on me and I find it disconcerting that she knew.

"Yes, I've known." She messed with the buttons and started a cup of coffee. "You've been blocked for a reason Mari, and I know it's overwhelming to have the magic coming back but there is only one person who can help you understand everything."

"I do remember feeling this before." It was vague flashes, just like my dreams, but the spark of awareness let me know it's something I'd struggled to control before and I remember my father voice his concerns. "I'll contact my father soon but for now you'll answer my questions. What is a Light Witch?"

"We are part human and part Fae creatures who have been blessed with a light from another world as a means to protect those we can from the Darkness that crawls around in this world." She hands me a cup and starts hers. "Which is exactly what we are going to do, Mari, we are going to find Gracie and save her from these men that took her."

I sat down at the round table piled high with files and sighed. A steaming mug of coffee warmed my chilled hands. Deep within, I was cold and broken, missing that vital part of myself with my family gone. But Molly was certain we would find Gracie, and so was I.

The file I read first came from the top of Molly's piles. The notes made by Luke were dated a few months ago. I looked over his perfect script and precise notes. Just seeing his handwriting was painful. Everything that reminded me of my husband tore my heart apart more.

"Luke was working with a detective to take down a man named Shadid." Molly notes as she settles beside me.

"I've heard of Shadid. Luke and the detective gained enough evidence to prosecute, I could see a retaliation. I'm still not sure why they would kidnap Gracie though, that's what I can't wrap my head around yet." My thoughts drift to the man holding Gracie and taking her and the fact I wasn't quick enough to stop it. I quickly wiped the tear away. A spark of magic jumping from my fingertips with the action.

Molly nodded and pulled another file. When she opened it, a picture sat atop, pinned to the folder. As she slid the paper across the table, I let my eyes settle on the man. The hard glare he wore stood stark to the dark browns of his eyes. His mouth was set in a grim line. His black cropped hair sat in disarray.

"I'm so sorry this has happened to you, but this is what I do, I'm trained to protect people. And I'm sorry I wasn't there to save your family, to save Luke, but I'll find Gracie and I won't stop until I bring her home."

Sighing, I reached across the table and squeezed Molly's hand, surprised I was able to offer someone else comfort. But I knew Molly cared for my family. She'd always been there for us since I met Luke in college. "There was nothing you could have done, but I know you'll help me find her."

Letting go of Molly's hand, I returned to looking at case file after case file that depicted Shadid's apparent wrath and lack of remorse. Each sheet I read cemented that this man was, in fact, all that was awful in this world. This man had the motive to assassinate my husband.

"Could Shadid have been the man that killed Luke? The man who stood in my living room trained for years. He was a skilled assassin and in no way new or inexperienced in hostage and murder. He shot that handgun without even a small tremble in his hand. This Shadid seems like more of giving the directive type of guy."

"I know Shadid keeps guards with him, they're trained," Molly spoke as she took another sip from her coffee mug while I stood from the table. I had a small lead at least. I knew this Shadid would be difficult to find. "Where are you going?"

"To find Shadid." The detective working with my husband had made notes of places Shadid frequented and some of his crew. Shadid's appearance led you to believe he was a businessman, yet his 'businesses' were a ruse. They kept the attention away from his other side trades. There was something off with this criminal organization and I would figure out how to find him.

"Wait, you can't. You aren't ready for this." I bent down to steal one more sip of my coffee and thought about which business I'd start with. I walked towards the door and solidified the plans in my head. "Mari, dammit, stop." Molly's firm hand grasped my arm.

Trails of gold light poured from her hand as she kept me still. I glanced down for a moment before I looked backing her storm-colored eyes. I reached my hand up and pulled hers away.

"I've got this. More so than you know. You keep following leads. Get me all the information you can. Like who that detective is, and I'll try to find leads on Shadid's location." I released her hand and added. "I will come back here at night if that helps?"

I couldn't stay in my house and being closer to the city would ideal. I would search the entire damn city before I rested.

With the look I gave, Molly realized she couldn't stop me. That at this point no one could stop me from bringing my daughter home. Anyone that stood between her and me would die.