Buzzed Hearts

42: a gentle promise

THERE'S TWO THINGS CAMILA HAS always been prepared for: to reject and to be rejected.

    Before the words fall from Laurent's mouth, she's already tense and ready to turn around. Feeling her coil in his arms, he laughs a bit and secures her tighter.

    "No, no. This talk is gentle," he says into her ear.

    "I don't think so, Laurent."

    "It is. I promise."

    He holds out his pinky finger and Camila eyes it before giving in and looping her own around his. Still not relaxed, she huddles deeper into the sleeping bag.

    "I think you should go to prom with Andrew."

    "You said this talk would be gentle."

    "It is. I'm gently pushing you towards Andrew. I...I've been feeling guilty lately that you're so in love with me."

    "Not in love."

    "It's not that I don't like you. It's because I'm hardly...taking care of myself right now. So maybe go to prom with Andrew and...we'll work it out later. Why are you so hung up on me anyways? It can't be just my attractiveness."

    Camila twists her neck and she's set ablush—wild roses against her cheeks—as she finds his hooded eyes staring down at her. Almost romantically, lips parted and tinged pink from the wind.

    "I don't know," she whispers. "That's not a good explanation but—"

    "I get it. You can't explain attraction."

    "But do you feel...anything? Towards me."

    It takes him a while to answer but this allows Camila the brief time to study his features and how much softer they look under the moonlight. He's always had the most impeccable face to her—and for many other people too, she assumes. Straight lines and smooth skin.

    "Or is it because you're waiting for someone else?" she asks when he doesn't answer.

    "For you? It's hard to say. Not for anyone else though. I've honestly never felt anything...like this."

    "So why not?"

    "College is in three months."

    "So you're scared?"

    Laurent grins and he rocks them around. "Just wait, okay?"

    "Can't promise you anything, King."

    "We should probably go back. C'mon. I'll hold you down there if you want. Just...one more night. I don't want you to fall irreversibly in love with me."

    "Elle's right."

    "About what?"

    "You're full of yourself."

    "Careful," he says and steadies her as she jumps through the window. She grabs his hand when her sock slides against the window pane and they don't let go until they're back downstairs.

    "You promised a cuddle."

    "So come here then," he murmurs.

    So it turned out sort of like a rejection—but gentle, as he promised. But not quite because Camila feels serenity pulsing through her veins and she closes her eyes, inhaling his scent. I guess this is it. For now, she thinks. It's unclear who falls asleep first but they do, one and the other.