Cravings (girlxgirl)

A Plane Ride

                She smiled and touched my cheek gently and I leaned into her hand and closed my eyes. “I love you Devon Raines.”

                “I love you, Sara Bradock. Say you’ll come. I won’t make you, I don’t want to make you do anything, but I thought that it would be nice to see your parents before Christmas. And mine.”

                “When do you want to see yours?”

                “We talked earlier, and they said the first of December worked for them. They’re usually pretty busy…lawyer stuff most of the time…but they want to see you. They pushed things around because of you, you know. They really want to meet you, and I want you to meet them, and I want to meet your parents and…please say yes?” I asked, my eyes still closed tightly.

                She kissed me gently and I opened my eyes to see those striking green ones staring back at me. I breathed in deeply, vanilla and lavender. She was my drug, from those eyes, to her lips, to her hair, to that laugh, and definitely from that smell.

                “Of course.” She whispered. “I’d love both of those. Meeting our parents.”

                “Then we could spend Christmas together, just you and me.” Say yes. I had decided how I was going to do it, proposing, and I needed her to say yes.

                “That sounds really nice.”

                I smiled broadly. “Yeah, it sounds really great I think.”

                We were standing in line to board when I finally said it. “I’m scared of flying.” I whispered hoarsely as we took another step forward.

                “What?” She looked towards me, a shocked look in her eyes.

                “Terrified, really.” Another step closer.

                “Why didn’t you say something?”

                “I didn’t want you to worry about me. I didn’t want you to say no. It’s that important to me. I want to see your home, I want to meet your family, I want to see where you grew up, and I want to see the town where you grew up. I want that so much that I’m going to get on this stupid plane and try not to freak out too much until we land.” I clenched my jaw in determination and focused on taking another step forward.

                She entwined our fingers together and squeezed my hand gently. She let her cheek rest against my shoulder. “You’re sweet. Much sweeter than I thought you could be. I like that you prove me so wrong every day. I know you can be sweet now, but I remember that girl I first met, the one who took me home without saying much of anything and told me her name only after she was done screwing. She was completely different from this girl. I liked the one I met that night, but I love this one. The sweet one. The cute one. The one who’s willing to face her fears for me.”

                I smiled and kissed the top of her head before moving forward again. Just a few more steps. “You have no idea.” I said, chuckling quietly to myself.

                One more step.

                I’m not ready. Oh God. Damn. I regret this. I should have Skyped them instead. Anything, anything but this. God. No. Please.

                The person in front of us went into the tunnel, but I couldn’t take that step to the podium, my feet wouldn’t move at all.