Silence and Sadness

Duet

But does anyone notice?
But does anyone care?
And if I had the guts to put this to your head...
And would anything matter if you're already dead?
And now should I be shocked by the last thing you said?
Before I pull this trigger,
Your eyes vacant and stained...
And in saying you loved me,
Made things harder at best,
And these words changing nothing
As your body remains,
And there's no room in this hell,
There's no room in the next,
And our memories defeat us,
And I'll end this direst.

But does anyone notice?
But does anyone care?
And if I had the guts to put this to your head...
But does anything matter if you're already dead?
And should I be shocked now by the last thing you said?
Before I pull this trigger,
Your eyes vacant and stained...
And in saying you loved me,
Made things harder at best,
And these words changing nothing
As your body remains,
And there's no room in this hell,
There's no room in the next,
But does anyone notice there's a corpse in this bed?

Frankie stopped playing and looked up at me with a smile. "That was beautiful, baby. You sing like an angel." he said. I blushed and lowered my head. "I'm not that good." I argued. Frankie put his guitar down and got on his knees on the floor, looking up at my face, which was partially hidden behind a curtain of my hair. He reached up and pushed my hair out of my eyes. "Please, Gee. You need to be more confident in yourself. I mean everything I say about you, every single word. You are beautiful, your eyes are heavenly, your voice is angelic. You're...perfect. You're everything I could have ever asked for and more." he said. I wanted to believe him, but he was wrong. Perfect? Me? What was perfect about me? I was just a freak, a burden on everybody and everything. Tears started to fall down my cheeks. All the bad thoughts started to run through my head.

You should have died that day.

Nobody wants you around.

You're nothing but a low-life freak.

You're different.

That last one got to me. Everybody always said that being different was a good thing, that it showed who you truly were as a person. Well, if being different was such a great thing, why were people like me always picked on it? Why did people like me go out and take our lives because we were different? Being different just makes you a freak! There isn't anything good in being different. It's doing what everybody else does that makes you cool, following the in crowd. But that confused me, too. I smoked, I drank. The cool kids did that. So, why was I still picked on?

Because you're a mute.

Because you wear makeup.

Because you're emo.

Because you listen to the wrong kinds of music.

There were probably hundreds of reasons, but there was only one conclusion- I was a freak.

I was snapped out of my thoughts by Frankie screaming my name. I looked up into his eyes, then I noticed that I was crying. Frankie was, too. "Gerard, baby, what's wrong? Please, talk to me!" he begged. I instead buried my head in his shoulders and just sobbed. He seemed a little disappointed that I didn't say anything, but he ignored it and started rubbing my back gently, shushing my softly. "Baby, talk to me. You can tell me." he said. I took a few deep, shaky breaths and said, "I-I'm so sick of being different. I'm not perfect, Frankie. I'm so f-far from p-perfect, I'm...I'm...I'm just a freak, Frank. I-I should have d-died that day. I should have jumped. I shouldn't have let Bob stop me." Frank's eyes widened in shock at my words. "Gee, honey, no. Listen to me, this is not really you talking, okay? This is the anger and frustration talking, and believe me, Gee, I know what that feels like. I know what it feels like to want to end it all, to let it all go. Honey, it doesn't matter what anybody else thinks of you. It matters what Mikey thinks of you, what your parents think of you, what Ray thinks of you, what Bob thinks of you. It matters what I think of you. Gee, nothing else matters except what the people who care about you think of you, and we all care about you, and think you're amazing! If we didn't think that, Bob would have let you jump that day. We all care about you, Gerard. I care about you so much, Gerard. Even the thought of losing you terrifies me each and every day! If I were to actually lose you, I wouldn't be able to live, Gee. I need you so much more than you can imagine, and I love you just the same. Please, baby, stop thinking things like that. You're beautiful to Mikey, to your mom and dad, to Ray and Bob."

He pressed his lips to mine and in pulling away, he said, "You're beautiful to me."

*Dabs at eyes with tissues* Oh my feels, how they have been hurt! No, but seriously. I hope you all enjoyed this bc I worked really hard on this. I didn't even have the last scene with Gerard's breakdown and Frank's speech planned, but they happened, and I couldn't be happier with how that turned out. Please, if you liked this, click that star ( you see it...good), and leave a comment. Later!