What the heart wants (boyxboy)

Twenty-four

"Mitch! Get out of bed!" My mom charges into my room opening curtains "it's been three days Mitchell get up!"

"Mom it's like 8am get out of my room" I cover my head with a pillow

"First of all it's noon and second this is my house so every room in it is also mine"

"Fine! I'm awake!" I sit up "what do you want?"

"Jax leaves the hospital today"

"Thanks for telling me" I lay back down

"Aren't you going to visit him?"

"When I'm ready"

"Mitch when he wasn't awake you spent half your day at that hospital and now that he is awake you're hiding"

"I'm not hiding"

"Then what are you doing Mitch? You have two weeks off of school and you're wasting them, why?"

"Mom this is what I do everyday! Why does it matter now?"

She sighs "Summer stopped by this morning to get you before heading to the hospital to help Jax move back home, but you've been in this slump all week that I told her you'd meet them there"

"Why are you pushing this?"

"Are you scared Mitch?"

"Don't answer my question with a question"

"Then answer mine and I'll answer yours, are you scared of seeing him?"

"If I say yes will you leave?"

"No" she sits down next to me

"I didn't think so"

Running her hand through my hair "you're the strongest person I know Mitch, and I've always seen you go after what you want, what's stopping you from going after Jax?"

"Are you ok with this? How I feel about Jax?"

"Does it matter if I am?"

"Yes! I'm in love with Jax mom so that would make me gay, right? Are you ok with having a gay son?"

She smiles "I don't think you're gay Mitch or at least I don't think you truly know what you want yet"

"I don't"

"It's ok to be confused but you're not going to find any answers by moping in your room" She gets up walking to the door "gay or not Mitch I don't care, I just want you out of this house" and leaves.

•—•

It's night...

I sit in my car across the street from Jax's house tempted to get out of my car and go knock on his door. The light in his room is on. I've been here for almost 3 hours scared to go in. Everyone's been forcing me to go see him and I want nothing more than to see him, I guess I'm just trying to avoid what's going to happen after I see him. What if he heard what I said? What if- in the middle of my thought my phone rings. I stare at the screen not believing it, it's him Jax is calling me. Looking up at his window I see him standing there with the phone to his ear, he sees me so I answer as I get out of the car "hi" I keep looking up at him

"Will you come inside please?" His voice sounds so weak and fragile

"Sure." Walking towards his house I walk in without even knocking. No one's around so I walk up the stairs to his room. Standing behind his door I'm about to knock when the door swings open

"Hi" he smiles

"I'm sorry" is the only thing I can come up with "I'm a jerk for not coming to see you today"

Pulling me into his room he hugs me, his arms wrapped tight around my neck "you're always saving me" letting go he shuts his door and walks to his bed sitting on it "I must look amazing" he struggles to speak "I'm sorry I sound so bad"

"It's ok I sounded the same way when I woke up"

"When'd you wake up?"

"A week ago."

I awkwardly stand near the door not knowing what to do with myself "Mitch come here" walking over I sit next to him "I feel awful" he rests his head on my shoulder "I really wished you were here today, but I guess you made up for it by parking outside of my house for hours"

"I didn't think you knew I was there"

"I know what your car looks like Mitch" he chuckles. "Why'd you leave when I woke up?"

"I don't know, I just wanted to give you and your family some space"

"Speaking of my family, my parents wants to invite your family over for dinner for saving my life, I told them you'd never go for it so just tell me no and I'll tell them you said no" he looks at me waiting for my answer

"I'd love to"

Smiling "seriously?" I nod "why?" Because I want to spend more time with you

but of course that's not what I said "I don't know, my mom would probably love that"

"Ok well I'll tell them you said yes" he says excitedly.

Jax looks so tired, under his eyes are dark, and he has bandages all over "it's late you should get some rest"

"yeah" he climbs in bed under his covers "would you do me one favor before you go"

"Sure"

"Can you go in my bathroom and grab my medication it should be by the sink?"

"Yeah of course"

Walking into his bathroom and look around for his medication bottle, spotting it next to the sink I pick it up. As I'm about to walk out of the bathroom something else on the counter catches my attention. I completely forget what I was sent to do because the object on his bathroom counter is throwing me off, Jax walks over realizing I'm still in the bathroom "Mitch?"

"What is that?" I point

"You weren't supposed to see that" he pulls me out of the bathroom and shuts the door

"Why not?"

"Because you hate me and you were dating Jessie"

"How long have you had it?"

"The day after butternut got cut down, you were so angry I've never seen you that angry. I realized I told you you didn't care about anything when you cared about butternut all along. I know it's no giant tree but I figured you can plant it in your back yard, the lady at the garden said it'll take years but it will eventually grow into a full butternut tree" I stand there staring at him "it was a stupid idea right? That's why I didn't want to give-" before he could finish I walk towards him and hug him.

Wrapping my arms around him I pull him in tight and hug him "that's the most thoughtful gift anyone's ever gotten me thank you"

"You ran into a burning building for me Mitch, I promise I can do better than a plant" he hugs me back his head buried in my shoulder.

I'm not ready to let him go but we can't stand like this forever so I loosen my grip and he does the same. Letting go I stare into his tired eyes and tired smile, Jax is barely able to stand "you should really get some rest now" I back up

"No!" He grabs my hand "if I get in bed then that means you'll have to leave" he frowns

"I'll stay" I say and he picks up his head

"No I can't ask you to do that"

"You're not asking Jax I'm offering"

He smiles "ok. I just have to take these awesome pills the doctor gave me and I'll be set" taking the bottle that I didn't realize I was still holding he takes his medication and gets in bed. Setting myself up in a chair across his bed I wait for him to fall asleep "Mitch?" Jax lays on his back

"Yeah?"

"Are we ever going to talk about it? You saving me"

"I'll tell you all about it tomorrow" I hear his quiet chuckle

"Good night Mitch"

"Good night."