The Messenger

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Nineteen

It’s been a gruelling six months, but today is the day the trial finally comes to an end. The day  I will finally figure out if I shall go to prison or not. The day I have been dreading and also couldn’t wait to come. I don’t know exactly what my feelings toward today are. Either way it goes my life will change, if it is for the better or worse, I don’t know only time will tell me that. I honestly think that if Ariella wasn’t here to keep me sane I wouldn’t have been able to push through these last few months. Believe me they have been extremely rough. Caroline stopped showing up at the court, I guess she figures that they’ll just send me off to prison without a second thought. At first that’s what I thought was going to happen, but after Ariella reassured me over a million time that things would go in my favor, I eventually gave in and believed her and Hector.

 She’s been my rock, and I have been hers. Whenever she couldn’t visit me Ariella made sure that she’d call me and let me know why she couldn’t have made it. The next visit she tended to apologize frequently for missing it even though I would assure her that it was alright. She told me once that she worried about me at night because anything can happen to me at anytime of the day and she wouldn’t know it. I was flattered by her concern but I had to tell her that I was a man and I could take care of myself. 

I think over the course of these six months her and I have established a very strong bond. A bond I’m sure most people wouldn’t understand. She cares for me deeply and I care for her, just not exactly in the same way. She assumes that our friendship is something more like a romantic relationship. I have never told her this because I do not want to ruin what we already have. I know this is stupid but I still have feelings for Rachel Clark. I mean I hadn’t really expected my feelings for her to go away overnight, but I just wished they did. 

Rachel actually came to visit me in jail to try to explain her reasoning behind playing with my heart. When the guards brought me to the booth she was seated at I almost had the right mind to turn around and leave her sitting there, but the stupid part of my brain longed for answers to my questions. So against all things I know is better I let the guards sit me at the booth. For awhile we sat in complete silence just watching the other, well, mainly me watching her. I think she might have been waiting for me say something first, but if I opened my mouth I knew she wouldn’t like what ever came out of it.

Rachel squirmed under my gaze and averted her eyes to the brick wall behind me. “S-So how are you Liam?” she asked as she fidgeted nervously.

“How the fuck do you think I am doing in here Rachel? After all you did put me here.” She flinched at my cold harsh tone. But I could care less, this woman before me is just like the rest of them. A lying ungrateful bitch. I risked everything for her and this is how she repays me? Why I didn’t kill her when I had the chance instead of falling in love with the stupid wench, I don’t know. Why had I doubted Caroline again, I still don’t know. If I had a time machine that would be the first thing I changed. If it wasn’t for her I wouldn’t be in this fucking mess in the first place.

She sighed deeply as if something is troubling her. “I’m sorry Liam. I’m really, really sorry for everything I am putting you through. I-I never thought she would actually go through with it…” she trailed off. I rolled my eyes and scoffed. Whenever a person does anything wrong they think they can just fix it with apologies. Sorry can’t fix this, it won’t give me the months I spent in this hell hole back. So I say fuck you stupid apologies.

“Unless you are going to explain to me why you did this shit then I have no purpose in talking to you. Goodbye Rachel.” I removed the telephone from my ear and started to place it on it’s hook.