The Real Me In The Real World

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So in case you guys didn't know. But the person I am now then what I used to be has changed. I was really shy and quiet. I kept to myself I would always read in school and didn't talk to people.

When I did I usually kept quiet still until I got to know them better. I have trust issues in the real world and on here now. I will keep quiet until I think I can trust the person to talk more. I was like that through out middle school and high school.

But when I was younger I used to be loud and bold. I would kiss any boy I could get my hands on. I even had boys fighting over me in day care along with elementary school. I played rough with the boys and even started dressing like one I was a huge tomboy until I started developing a figure.

I used to be skinny until I had to take meds that made me gain weight. So apparently I was attractive at a young age. I looked older than I was when I was younger. Anyways if you guys haven't read the book called my prison called life I thought I would tell you guys on here.

Back to what I was saying. When my dad came back into my life and things got violent I withdrew into myself and of course that's how kali was created. I missed being the girl I used to be.

I didn't like being shy and quiet but I did it to protect people from getting hurt by my dad I pushed people away.  I even pushed Steven away when I became like that when he came into my life.

But he didn't give up on me. Anyways now that I'm older and living on my own and being away from my family that treated me like an actual punching bag both mentally and physically. I have finally got out of my shell and I'm able to talk to people more.

I'm more out going again. People seem to like me and gravitate towards me I even get told that some people like me as more than a friend cuz of it. Thanks to me being more open I got a job and more friends and I'm able to laugh and able to do shit again. I've been cleaning my whole place up.

What I'm trying to say in this long post is that. I'm glad I went through the hell I went through if I didn't go through the abuse and all the other crap I wouldn't be so strong and determined thanks to that I have amazing kids and an amazing fiance.

I know that some people get tired of me talking about my past. But I don't care I'm saying it in this post to show how much change I've gone through.

I'm even able to tell people the truth now. Even if they don't like it. This is who I am.

I'm able to talk more
I'm able to smile more
I'm able to laugh more
I'm able to be more confident
I'm able to fight more
I'm able to be more determined
I'm able to tell people the truth even if they don't like it
I'm able to be the old me

I'm the person I want to be now
So if you got a problem with it? Then deal with it or leave it's not my problem it's yours.

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