response of souls | ᴷᴴᴮ × ᴷᴶᵂ

XII

#1 flashback chapter

ㅡ

He remembered everything just too well. He remembered every little detail, no matter how small it actually was. No matter how painful the sight was, he just remembered it and his dreams made sure he would never forget it. They made sure he would never forget about the pain, about all the blood, simply about everything. He even remembered every single thought he had thought that evening like he was just thinking them now. He remembered how happy he had been that day before his whole life turned upside down. He remembered the happy, smiling faces of his friends. He remembered how they had been laughing together. And he remembered how his nightmare started just too well.

[ 4 years ago / monday before Chanwoo and Jiwon's deaths ]

"..yah! Are you listening to me?.. Yah! Hanbin-ah!?" Hanbin heard a voice from behind him. He noticed how the voice slowly grew impatient, but he wasn't going to spare the owner of that voice any attention right now. He was too busy with watching Jiwon and Raiko, watching them was too important right now. He didn't even recognize himself grumbling incomprehensible words to himself.
"Yah!.. Damn, could you stop that!?" Hanbin heard again. Just as he finally decided to look at the voice's owner somebody hit him at the back of his head.
"Ouch! Damn, hyung! What was that for!?" Hanbin whined, finally looking up at Jinhwan, who was obviously angry at him.
"Just listen when I talk to you! And stop staring at them, you creep!" Jinhwan complained, sitting down beside him. Hanbin rubbed the point where Jinhwan had just hit him and pouted at the older. Jinhwan ignored his pout and just glared at him. Hanbin averted his gaze.
"S..sorry, hyung." Hanbin mumbled while looking down at the bench they were sitting on. Jinhwan sighed, closing his eyes before he looked up to the sky, sighing again. Hanbin then watched his hyung. 'Something about him seems to be different these days..' Hanbin thought while watching his hyung looking at the sky. After a while of silence Hanbin couldn't take it anymore, he wanted to know what his hyung had been talking to him about.
"Hyung, what did you ask before? I didn't get it." Hanbin asked. Jinhwan looked at him, rolling his eyes.
"Of course you didn't get it. You were too immersed in stalking them.." Jinhwan said, pointing at Jiwon and Raiko, who were cuddling on the grass, talking about the clouds which drifted by. "..seriously, when are you gonna stop? You should get over him." Jinhwan continued. Hanbin looked at the happy, cuddling couple again, sighing as he wished it was him, his best friend was cuddling with. Hanbin shrugged his shoulders, he just didn't know when his feelings gonna die down. Hell, he didn't even know when he had started feeling that way towards his best friend. Maybe they had always been there and Hanbin had only recognized them now, since he had grown older, maybe wiser. But in the end it all might be just some kind of wishful thinking? After all he had never been in a relationship, had never had a girlfriend.. or boyfriend. He had never been interested, but suddenly his feelings for his best friend had changed. And then there was Raiko, Jiwon's girlfriend, the 'love of his life' as Jiwon liked to call her. The funny thing was, Hanbin really liked her. She was really nice, kind, had a beautiful smile and was really caring, not just about Jiwon, but about all of them. Sometimes Hanbin even got the feeling that she might know about his feelings for Jiwon, but as soon as he got that feeling it was gone again. Hanbin wasn't jealous of her, he really wasn't, he was actually jealous about the fact that Jiwon was in love and that he wasn't the one receiving that love.

"Hanbin-ah! Earth to Hanbin. Hello? Somebody there??" Jinhwan asked, really annoyed now. Hanbin blinked at him in confusion, he hadn't recognized himself drifting off again.
"I'm so sorry, hyung! I don't know what's up with me today." Hanbin tried to explain, but even Jinhwan knew that was a lame excuse.
"Today? More like the past few weeks! It's getting worse, Hanbin. I' m just surprised Jiwon himself didn't notice yet." Jinhwan explained, sighing again. He was really worried about Hanbin, this whole situation wasn't good for the younger. Jinhwan knew just too well from experience.
"So, what are you actually here for?" Hanbin asked after a while, trying to keep his concentration at his hyung in front of him.
"I asked you, if you're with us next Friday? You remember? We talked about visiting that new restaurant at the harbor?" Jinhwan asked. Hanbin just blinked at him, not knowing what his hyung was talking about. Jinhwan saw the nescience written all over Hanbin's face.
"You said you'd talk to your parents? Since they asked you to come home that weekend?" Jinhwan continued asking and suddenly Hanbin remembered. They had been talking about it, he remembered now, just a few days ago when they had all been at Junhoe's, excluded Jiwon of course. Jiwon had been at the cinema with Raiko, forgetting about the weekly meeting with his little group of friends. Nobody had been angry with him, though. They were all happy for Jiwon, they liked seeing them together, and it kinda made them believe that they would one day have a relationship like that by themselves.