There's No Accounting For Love

Chapter Twenty Six

The next day, Angie told Alan what Clare had said and Alan felt devastated for her. It was harder for her than he could possibly imagine. The atmosphere in the office was not the same. It wasn't difficult for Alan, not to joke and mess around, all this emotion had gotten to him too.

At the beginning of April, Clare came into Alan's office looking upset.

"Alan," she said, "I want to give you a month's notice to terminate my employment."

Alan was startled. What had happened to bring this about?

"Clare! What do you mean?" he cried.

"I'm leaving, Alan, I have to get away. I need to clear my head, I just have to." Clare looked about to burst into tears.

"Aren't you happy here?" he asked.

"I'm not happy anywhere." said Clare "I need a change."

Alan was dumb founded, but in true Alan style he said,

"Well, if you need to get away Clare, then you must go and we won't hold you to four weeks notice. I'll have a word with Bob. We'll get a temporary in until you come back."

"No, you can't do that. I might not come back." said Clare, tears spurting from her eyes.

"Are you sure you're doing the right thing. Where are you going?" he asked, finding this hard to handle.

"I'm going to Chester." said Clare.

"But that's miles away. Do you know anyone in Chester?"

"No, but it doesn't matter. I need to get away. I have to stand on my own two feet."

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So Clare left Dixon and Halfpenny. She asked Angie and Matthew if they would like to rent her house for a peppercorn rent and they were delighted. Angie loved Clare's house. Matthew had wanted to pay more rent, but Clare insisted, it was her way or not at all and as she needed someone she could trust to take good care of the house, they would be doing her a favour. Some of her possessions were packed up and put into storage and off she went to Chester with two suitcases.

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The first day in the office without Clare was truly awful, they'd not been able to find a temporary secretary so quickly and there was too much work on. Angie grumbled and Alan muttered under his breath. Jessica came in and asked "Where's Clare today?" and they had to explain she'd left. "Oh, what a shame. I really liked Clare." said Jessica, looking crestfallen as she walked unhappily back to the upstairs office.

"See? Even Jessica liked her. Everyone liked her." said Angie.

'I more than liked her!' thought Alan, but he said nothing.

Later that afternoon, Angie took him a cup of tea.

"We'll all miss her, but mark my words, she'll be back sooner or later."

"Sooner would be nice." replied Alan.

He was tempted to tell Angie that he was in love with Clare, but he didn't think she was ready for that just yet.

"I know," said Angie "but she's going to ring me tonight so I'll find out where she's staying. We can both call her. She'd like it if you gave her a call. We'll just have to take it as it comes." said Angie, hopefully.

It was coming to the end of the awful day and Alan was sitting on his sofa, whiskey glass in hand. He'd never felt quite like this before, so completely helpless and confused, not even when Marie had left him and betrayed him so badly. Such was his love for Clare! Alan suddenly thought, what would Clare do if she were in this situation? Perhaps she would pray? He knew she had faith. Perhaps I could try, thought Alan and he racked his brains trying to remember. It was a long time since he'd prayed. They'd gone to Sunday School and Church together, him and Clare and had lots of fun. They'd taken part in lots of different activities, especially artistic things and there had been outings to the countryside or the seaside each summer. Prize giving was always good. Every year, on the church's anniversary each child received a book, by way of encouragement. Alan still had his books somewhere. He'd never part with them.

Alan finished his whiskey and walked out onto the balcony. Weather wise it had been glorious, but he'd been too pre-occupied to notice. He noticed now, as he leant against the railings. Spring flowers, mainly bright yellow daffodils, were blooming in the garden. Everything looked alive and fresh. The grass had been cut and was like green velvet. Alan looked up at the sky, it was a deep blue, although the sun was going down and it would soon be twilight.

"I know you're out there somewhere, Lord," he said out loud. "Although I've not talked to you for a while, but please, please, watch out for Clare. I love her, you know that, so please bring her safely back to me. I'll try to be a better person. I'll do anything, I really will. Anything."

Alan stopped. There was nothing more to say. He hesitated and then said "Amen." That seemed to round it off and it hadn't been as difficult as he'd first thought.

The three rugby players, Barking, Larking and Tarquin called up from the garden. "Hello, Alan, coming down for a lager?"

"No thanks, I've had a bad day. I think I'm getting a migraine. See you later." Alan smiled to himself as he went inside. It was always a good excuse and unfortunately, it was often true. He loathed migraine. It was too horrible to even think about. So he thought about Clare instead.

He thought of Hal's funeral, two and a half months ago. How long would he have to wait for Clare to recover from her bereavement? Not that is mattered as long as Clare came home. But would she come home? Alan fancied another whiskey, but he knew Clare probably wouldn't approve, so he had a coffee and a couple of biscuits instead.