Lauren Pov
I woke up this morning cold i didn't feel my lovely warm girlfriend beside me. I rubbed my eyes and got out of our king sized bed my feet hitting the cold floor, making me flinch slightly. I walked out of our room and i heard little sniffles coming from the kitchen. I raised an eyebrow walking towards the kitchen, when i walked i saw y/n hunched over with unfocused eyes. I ran towards her helping her balance wrapping my arm around her waist(which has gotten really really smaller). I sat her on the living room couch. "Babe, are you ok?" i asked softly moving some brown hair out of her face. She looked at me for a minute before responding. "Yeah..i'm fine just feeling a bit sick" i looked over her before just dropping it, she'll tell me when she wants to. "Ok babe feel better" i said kissing her forehead before turning and walking to our bedroom trying to add things up.
........
2 days later
Y/n Pov
I was writing in my notebook right now, something Lauren doesn't know about. I put today's date and wrote my thoughts.
January, 14, 2016
Hello well it's me again, just like everyday. Nothing new today...but i think Lauren is catching on, i think she knows i'm starving myself. She'll always make me eat even when i don't want to, just the sight of food is making me sick now. I miss loving myself. I miss being comfortable in my body. I miss not feeling your body is tearing apart because i'm not eating. But i'll keep on for Lauren she's my everything and she thinks i'm worth something even if i don't. Well i guess that's all for today journal i'll be here tommrow.
Goodbye.....
I shut my journal putting my head in my hands, running my fingers through my hair. When i was running my fingers through my hair i felt something long and silky on my fingers. That's when i pulled back and saw my sandy brown hair between my fingers. I looked wide eyed at it before sighing loudly, i heard the door open so i quickly hid my hair. "Hey baby" Lauren said plopping down beside me sighing softly. "Hi babe" i said taking one of her hands into mine leaving a gentle kiss.
"You hungry?" Lauren asked after a while of silence. I mentally freaked out not wanting to see food, and not wanting Lauren to force me to eat it. "N-no...not um...not r-really" i said nervously. Her bottom lip quivering slightly before sighed. "Well my parents are having a little dinner and we're going, a-and you're going to eat since you didn't eat now y/n" Lauren said before quickly walking out the room, slamming the door. Maybe she knows...
........
I zipped up my dark purple dress turning my body towards the full length mirror. The dress looking quite big on me since i've been starving myself. I closed my eyes tightly before putting on my red lipstick. I walked out of the room seeing Lauren looking amazing. She had on a dark blue knee high drees with an hole in the back of it, with ankle high heels.
"You look amazing Lo" i said grabbing her hand spinning her around for more effect. She smiled and blushed slightly before turning towards me with a big smile"thank you babe" she said before kissing my cheek as we exited our house, and entered the car.
.......
Exiting the car i breathe in some of that fresh breeze instantly calming me, before grabbing Lauren's hand and entering the house. "We're Here!" Lauren yelled as we stepped into the house, already smelling the food they prepared making me slightly sick, but i put on a brave face...for Lauren. "MIJA" i hear Clara yell running towards the living room, as Lauren practically leaped into her arms.
I smiled at the mother daughter moment until Clara wanted a hug also. "Wow. Love you've gotten skinnier, Lauren are you starving this child" Clare said joke/seriously way. But Lauren's face turned stone cold, almost trying hard not to cry. "No mother, i don't starve her and she does eat" Lauren said coldly before storming off somewhere else.
I gave Ms. Jauregui a half smile before walking to the kitchen sitting down at the table.
The rest of the girls were already here everybody sitting in the dining room talking. I swear i got like a thousands comments about how skinny i got, every comment making Lauren more and more mad. She finally snapped when Chris walked through the door, and said something. "Y/n you got skinner, wh-" "WOULD YOU ALL JUST SHUT UP, GOD EVERYONE KNOWS SHE'S GOTTEN SKINNER YOU DON'T HAVE TO FUCKING POINT IT OUT, SO JUST LEAVE HER ALONE!!!!" Lauren yelled tears in her emerald eyes, before running out the house into the backyard.
Everybody was shocked all eyes looking at me as i ran after Lauren, who was silently crying on the swing set. I walked towards her careful not to scare her as i sat down next to her. I can tell she saw me from her peripheral vision, but kept looking straight ahead. "What wrong baby?" i asked softly watching tears drop from Lauren's eyes.
She turned her face towards me which only made her sob more. "W-w-what's wr-rong with y-you?" Lauren questioned back moving her hands to cover her face. I stared at her for a moment before responding. "Noth-" i was going to say before being cut off by Lauren angrily shooting up out of the swing. "WOULD YOU FUCKING STOP!?" She paused for a moment before talking again. "Why are you so skinny y/n, you better tell me now" Lauren said standing there looking at the ground.
"I-i've been s-starving myself" i said nervously not making any eye contact. "Why?" she asked still in the same position. "B-because i-i- i'm f-fat." i said not making eye contact with her. "Y/n" she said now in front of me, i didn't look at her or say anything. "Look at me y/n" i kept my eyes everywhere but in those beautiful green eyes, that i usually crave so much. "L-l-look at me" Lauren said shakly grabbing my chin making me look at her.
"B-baby" Lauren whispered when a tear fell out of my eye, as she pulled me in a hug making me cry harder into her arms. When i stopped crying she started talking me still into her arms. "You wanna know something?" she asked softly, as i nodded my head in her chest. "You're beautiful. Everything about you is beautiful i love you for you, because no matter what i will still love you. Starving yourself is i-i makes me sick to think you're not taking care of yourself. If you don't feel beautiful i promise i will try my very best to make you feel that way." i took my head out of her chest before softly stroking her cheek bringing our lips together.
I lips moved in perfect sync always fitting together perfectly. I finally broke the kiss opening my eyes, my forehead still against Laurens as i gave gave her a soft peck.
.......
I can honestly say Lauren kept up with her promise she always makes me feel beautiful. There isn't a time where she doesn't remind me of how beauiful i'am and i'm her everything.
I know i can always say i always have and always will love Lauren Jauregui....the girl who always makes me feel beautiful.
