He stood there unmoving unwanted, by anyone, anything in this sick and twisted world he was ready to leave, leave and finally be at peace with everyone that stood in his way when they were still a living breathing human. But something was holding him back, heaven. He never really believed in a God, much less the kingdom he supposedly ruled over. Then where would he turn to, where would he go? He believed in a Hell, he believed that there was more torture beyond this point. And at this point he really didn't care if he got peace nor torture, he just wanted out, out of this living hell he would wake up to every morning. He took a cautious step forward, pacing on the thin metal that separated him from his peace and torture he was dying to have. He stepped to the side once more, ready to get it over with, glancing back at his life around him. He stepped closer to the edge, until grabbing to the metal bars that shot up from the platform he resumed to stand on, he gripped the bars, turning his knuckles white. what am I doing? I can leave and let go. He thought debating on the action, he wanted to, but couldn't force him self just yet. he tilted his head up, looking at the stars tears in his eyes.
"I'm coming" he whispered, slipping his hands from the rusty metal that head kept him balanced moments before. Leaning back slightly, feeling the ground drop beneath him as his feet slid off the sides of the metal, leaving him to fall the horrible, long way down to the river that awaited. all he could think of was him finally getting his death wish, peace. He fell slowly letting his stomach detach and be left several feet above him. Warm tears slipped from his eyes, down his airborne body. he felt finally free, until the worst could happen, he was caught. Caught in an act he wanted no one to see. he was supposedly be the worrier of the family, take care of everyone. His dads death bed wish, gone, stepped on in the bitterness.
"DEAN?!" a shriek, from a voice he new all to well, as the panic started to boil inside him, clawing its way from his head to his face. He grabbed desperately at the air, at anything he could wrap his fingers around to steady himself. Anything. He had not let himself think anything through, what was his little kid brother going to do? what would his uncle bobby think? Of course this would happen! he never let himself think anything through correctly! He never did believe in a lot especially cliché sayings, but he had to believe in this panic of a scene Dean Winchesters life, his life was going in order to all the good memories his mind had held onto over the years. As much as he hated to admit it, his life was flashing before his eyes. Sammy being born, the house fire that had killed there mom, his first detention, Sammy's first girlfriend. everything, and with every person he remembered came a set of disappointed, longing eyes, staring there way through him.
His back suddenly hitting something he was assuming was ground. rocks jabbing into his back, the red thick liquid running down his face. Out of all things he could do he laughed, laughed because why not? he was okay he was alive, he was numb, only numb from the pain before it kicked in. He stopped short of his happy scene that he was celebrating of his granted life, arching his back crying out into the dark, cold night air. he heard a set of boots running at him, then screaming frantically, nonsense. the male sat down next to him holding Deans head in his lap, striking softly at his hair, watching him die slowly in his arms. He shifted his head looking at the stranger, only splotches of color swirling in and out of focus, making it harder to see. He cringed at the sudden new discovery of pain that had found its way shooting through him. And when he tried to speak he was shushed, being quitted the man. the man starred back at Deans eyes, watching them slowly slip out of continuances, the man was a mess. He lurched up coughing blood out of his slightly parted lips. And in an instant he knew there was nothing he could do for his soon to be dead friend. The winchester sat back again, resting his head on the mans lap, croaking out a few simple words before he was able to stop himself,
"C-Cas?" and everything went pitch black. His eyes loosing all life to them, the man watching them drain of color. He was gone.
(And I know this is an SPN fanfic one shot thing but I really feel that it was written in just a way to express what was going on in my head at that point.)
