十五(一)

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I started trembling ferociously, and it was beyond my control, just like my feelings. It shook me from head to toe; I was shocked, alarmed, frightened and petrified, or more-like Petra-fried.

Before I knew it, tears leaked from their cages and slipped away towards their freedom; my eyelids fluttered, trying to chase them away. I sniffled like the mess I was and, finally able to move, brought my hands to my face and sobbed. I cried all my feelings away, these mixed emotions, these unclear thoughts, this dark close-future, this excruciating pain, this suffering, this torture. Everything rained on me; the heaviness of a human life, the density of the mistakes I had made, the thickness of the responsibility of my choices: everything was amassing on my shoulders, burdening my already hefty sac of problems.

"Shh... It's okay." Tsukishima stroked my back gently with his hand and whispered me reassuring words. But did he know? What he was doing to me was the least reassuring thing, the riskiest move ever, like betting all your money on Armin's resurrection. This was almost like cheating on Yachi.

I continued bawling like a child, and my face must've been this close to Kim Kardashian's crying face that Tsukishima kept holding my head to his chest. I guess neither did he want to see my weeping face.

I wept and I wept, not knowing when this flowing river would stop rushing; the sound around just seemed to have been muffled, and I could only hear the distinct sound of his comforting words. His chest barely heaved, and was snug, quite enjoyable; he smelled like coming home to see your loved ones, welcoming you back, after a long tired day of work. I wanted to burrow my head deeper into his embrace, and coop myself from all the responsibilities in this world.

"Oi, Kei. Don't you think that's going too far?" Akiteru asked from behind. Immediately, I pushed Tsukishima away and turned around to face the street. My cheeks turned into a shade of pink, as I realized that Akiteru had witnessed the whole scene.

"You got some explaining to do." The eldest brother continued, his voice dangerously close to a deathly whisper. I quickly dried my tears and managed to catch a glimpse of Akiteru's death stare. I trembled a little more at the intensity of this scene. Tsukishima stood a few feet away from him and they were both having a silent argument with their eyes.

"I think you need to explain a few things to me first." Tsukishima raised his eyebrow. They continued giving silent treatments until Akiteru broke the raging war and looked over to me with sudden cold eyes that still contained a little of his rage. It frightened me, those eyes, that were always so calm, so warm, so kind; I had never seen him like this, those were murderer's eyes.

"Y/n-chan, come on in. We'll be learning a lot of new things today."

I obeyed his words and walked in hastily and guiltily. I was coming in between brothers, in between the people I cared most about. I felt really bad, it felt like I was coming in between Sam and Dean, Armin and Eren, Makita and Futaba, Alec and Jace. Was I the bad guy?

We all walked into the dining room, where a meal had been carefully laid down by Ms. Tsukishima. She was standing in the kitchen's doorway, eyes wide with all the commotion, with the fact that it was the first time that she had seen me: someone had invited a stranger into her house. She was pretty, with sparkly eyes, her bob cut-hair was a pale taupe and she was wearing a yellow shirt underneath her light brown apron.

"H-hi, Ms. Tsukishima, sorry for intruding," I stuttered, trying to speak quickly due to this dire situation. "My name's L/n Y/n, nice to meet—"

"Just sit down." Kei cut in. We were both taken aback by the harshness of his voice.

I nodded and sat down without another word. I felt even worse than before, I had barged into a family while they were having dinner, and had broken the peaceful atmosphere with arguments. I gave an apologetic look to their mother but she looked as terrified as I was.

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