Housemates

Chapter 49

Mia nodded, lying on the bed, shaking. “I am,” she gasped. She bit her lip, and looked at Ellie. She had tears in her eyes.

“Dude,” Ellie said, feeling suddenly self-conscious. “I like you, but…”

“I am,” Mia said, but she was still shaking.

Ellie waited.

After a moment, Mia got herself under control. She stopped, at least for a moment. Then she said, “Oh fuck, I’m so sorry,” and started laughing again.

“Seriously,” Ellie said. “Fuck.”

Mia shook her head and rubbed her eyes and pulled one of the pillows over her face. She lay there for a moment, underneath it, shaking, then slowly went still. She pushed the pillow aside and sat up.

She wiped her face, and looked at Ellie, her face terribly grave. “Okay,” she said. “I’m good.”

“You’re done?”

“I’m done.”

“You do know what I’m talking about, right?” Ellie said.

Mia nodded, and seemed to be squeezing her mouth in a slightly odd way.

“Not just whether I need to right now,” Ellie said. “Whether I should all the time.”

“Yep. I get you.”

“So do I?” Ellie said. “If we’re doing this?”

“I don’t know,” Mia said. She sounded odd. She was talking in very short words.

“Of course you know,” Ellie said, watching her. “You’ve done this before.”

Mia shook her head, and opened her mouth, and started laughing again.

Ellie suddenly realized that watching might have been a mistake. Looking at Mia was probably a mistake.

Ellie looked anyway.

Mia was shaking. She held out her hand, and seemed to be trying to tell Ellie to wait. Ellie did. Mia looked up at the ceiling, not at Ellie, and slowly got calm again.

“Sorry,” Mia said. “I’m just…”

“Yeah. I can see.”

“Okay.” Mia took a deep breath. “So. I’m sorry but I don’t know. I’ve never bothered finding out.”

“How can you not know?”

“I just don’t. I pee when I pee.”

Ellie was almost disappointed. “You’re completely no help.”

“I’m help.”

“Not very much.”

“I am,” Mia said, and started making faces like she was about to laugh again. “I can help. It’s really easy. Do you need to?”

She snorted, and then started laughing, and Ellie just glared at her.

“Because if you need to,” Mia said, her voice unsteady. “Then you should go. That’s what I do.”

Ellie wanted to hit her.

“Because I really can’t believe,” Mia said, then hiccupped and looked surprised. “Sorry. Um. I really can’t believe no-one ever explained that to you. It’s like when you feel full inside…”

Mia’s voice trailed off, and her expression changed and she went back to laughing.

Ellie gave up. She slid to the edge of the bed, and looked around for her clothes. Her shirt was on the floor next to her feet, and her skirt was halfway across the room, but she couldn’t see her underwear anywhere.

She looked, and wondered if it was too much trouble to put everything back on. “Is anyone else home?” she said.

Mia kept laughing for a moment longer, then managed to stop. She wiped her face again. “Shouldn’t be,” she said.

Ellie looked at Mia. “Are you going to stop?”

Mia nodded.

“Good,” Ellie said. “Are you sure?”

Mia nodded again. She was calmer now. Gasping, but not laughing like she had been. “I’ll stop.”

“No, you dick.” Ellie looked at her. “I mean, are you sure no-one’s home?”

“Oh,” Mia said. Her breathing sounded odd, as if she was gasping a little. As if all the laughing meant she suddenly couldn’t breathe properly.

“Are you okay?” Ellie said, worried.

“Yep.”

“You sure about that?”

Mia nodded again. She looked calmer now. Ellie decided she was all right, that the laughing fit was over.

“So is anyone else home?” Ellie said.

Mia breathed in, and managed to shrug.

“Yes?” Ellie said. “No?” Really trying to find out. Trying not to look even the slightest bit funny.

“Sorry,” Mia said. “I really don’t know. I didn’t hear anyone, but I was kind of busy.”

“Yeah,” Ellie said. “Me too.”

Ellie picked up her shirt, and thought about stiff buttons, and then stopped and thought for a moment. She was at Mia’s. Mia must have something she could borrow. It had to be an advantage of being with Mia, all the borrowing she could do.

“Do you have something I could wear?” Ellie said.

“Course,” Mia said, and pointed to the dresser. She wasn’t laughing any more, but she was still breathing oddly, a little too fast, gasping now and then.

Ellie decided to ignore that. She got up, and went and opened drawers, and found a tee shirt, then shorts too.

“You’re looking at me, aren’t you?” she said after a moment.

“Yep,” Mia said. She wasn’t laughing now. She sounded smug.

Ellie pulled on the shirt, and then the shorts, and then wondered if she should have done it the other way around, since she was being looked at. Then she wasn’t sure why she cared which way she got dressed.

“Okay,” she said, and turned around. “Where’s the bathroom?”

“Left. At the end.”

Mia still had a strange grin, as if she was proud to have been staring at Ellie.

Or like she was about to laugh.

Ellie suddenly wasn’t sure.

Ellie stopped, and looked at Mia carefully, and Mia started shaking again.

“Fuck,” Ellie said, and opened the door.

She went out into the hall, and listened. She couldn’t hear anyone else around, and she was glad. She didn’t want to know if Mia’s housemates had been eavesdropping.

“Stop it,” she said to Mia. “Please.”

Mia nodded, and tried to wave like she was saying she was, but she kept laughing.

Ellie gave up, and pulled the door closed.