"Nah, seriously?"
"Deadass, I've never had my first kiss."
"How is you Dominican, and never had yo first kiss?"
"Mal, stop."
"No seriously."
"Kyla!"
É'stephanie giggled at them two as we sat on the floor in the room Kyla was sharing with me. It's been a week since she moved in and I was introducing her to the girls since, I was trying to force myself out that rut. She attends Metropolitan with us. Well Kyla and I. It just so happened that Mal could come over this weekend. My pops was out of town so he couldn't take me over even if I bribed him to. É'stephanie was fitting right in. She was still a sweet innocent girl like I remembered. Her parents were hella strict. So that's probably why it doesn't surprise me that she's gonna be fifteen in August and has never had her first kiss.
"My parents are very strict. So, I don't get out much or anything. They said no boys until after college–"
"Hell nah, I couldn't do that." Kyla said.
"Bitch, you? Hell, wit' Aaron's fine ass you think I was 'boudda let a fuckin' hoodrat get at him? Nigga please, fuckouttahea'." Mal added.
I just shook my head at them while É'stephanie continued giggling.
"Yo, Jaymon jus' texted me. They said they at the park, y'all tryna' slide?" Kyla said.
"Sure, why not?" Mal replied.
"You wanna go to the park wit' us Steph?"
"Yeah, I'm gonna go ask my parents! I'll be right back." She said before running out the room.
"I like her." Kyla said.
"Me too, she's dope. And innocent. I like her too Rae, she reminds me of you." Mal added.
"She's Dominican."
"You're West Indian."
"You have a point."
We chuckled and I took out my phone to see Ramón messaged me. I rolled my eyes before I read it.
U gon come thru to the park wit us?
2:12PM
Yeah. We bringing someone with us tho.
2:13PM
Aight bet.
2:17PM
I locked my phone and sighed. Then É'stephanie came back in.
"They said I could go." She smiled.
-
"So who 'dis?" Leo asked.
"Stop bein' rude and ask her dumbass." Mal said.
"A'ight damn, whas' ya name ma?"
"É'stephanie."
At the sound of her name, Ramón and Jaymon turned their attention to her.
"Tú eres Dominicano?" Ramón asked if she was Dominican.
"Sí, y tú?" She replied asking him if he was.
"Tambien, Dominicano." He smiled replying he was also.
"I'm half Mexican." Jaymon said. Kyla hit him upside the head.
We were all underneath the play set, chilling and talking. Ramón was passing a blunt like always. I just felt so out of place and alone. I wasn't even talking. I was observing everyone. I watched as É'stephanie and Ramón were having a full blown conversation in Spanish. Which of course I understood. I didn't care about that. I just felt so isolated. Everyone was so wrapped up in what they were doing. I enjoyed to see them that way. I just, remember for the first time I felt so alone with my favorite group of people. I put my earphones in, shuffling my music as Shabba played.
A week later...
"Dead my nigga, she wildin'!" Ramón cackled looking into his phone screen.
"What happen?"
"Nah, É'stephanie was talm 'bout this time she busted her ass down the steps at her old school. Straight booty slidin'!"
I laughed with him because the sight of it in my brain was pretty fucking hilarious. She had a tendency at times to be mad clumsy. It was funny because it made her look ditzy, but we knew she was smart as shit. In fact we became best friends from being in the gifted program together. Besides us staying in the same neighborhood before. Steph was so unbalanced.
"She always was like that." I chuckled.
"She reminds me of you." Ramón said.
"You're not the first to say that.."
He locked his phone and turned his attention to me, we were in his bed for once.
"You know I love you right mami?" He said.
"Yeah I know."
He hovered over me before his lips went in for the kill. I loved to kiss Ramón. I know I said it so many times before. But his plump lips on mine were heaven sent. He could merely erase all the pain with one touch of his lips. His hips surged forward into mine causing me to moan in his mouth.
"You so fuckin' sexy mami. You feel that?" He asked as his lips trailed down to my neck, his member hardening on top of me.
"Yes.." I whispered.
"I love you.." He said.
"I know babe.." I brought his lips back to mine so I could kiss him.
I knew. I knew that it hurt him that I didn't love him back. But, what do I know about love? What did I learn about love? I was dumb and naive, but I wasn't foolish. I would never tell someone something so serious as that and not mean it. And that's why I truly believe I drove Ramón to drastic measures.
