Ch.19

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                                      Chapter Nineteen

MIRANDA P.O.V

after we did that we laid under the covers nude and smiled at each other. "babe can I ask you something?" "yeah sure." I began to worry I never liked when someone asked me that there were millions of things they could ask me. " why do you have those in your ears?" he pointed to the hearing aids. "oh I never did tell you." "Tell me what?" "drew." I said sitting up. " ever since I was 14 I have been deaf." "Completely?" "mostly, after Jackson shot me I went completely deaf in my left ear." "how come I never knew?" "Most can't tell I always have them in but I always wear my hair down.'' "oh but how did it happen originally?" "Well one day me my mom and Aaron were driving to my aunt's house to pick up Dan as he was only 1 and she was babysitting. a truck wasn't paying attention and hit us straight on t boned us on the side I was sitting. so with the impact my head hit the window and I had a severe head injury. aaron had a broken leg from when the car hit us it was so powerful it pushed our car into a pole. my mom was fine just had some cuts from the flying broken glass and when I was rushed to the hospital they said that my head hit the glass so hard it made part of my head that controlled the hearing malfunction and just stopped working, we were told by the time I hit 20 I wouldn't have any hearing at all. but that all that was done to me was being deaf no broken bones nothing just turned deaf my mom cried for days and Aaron didn't really know what went on he was only a dumb 15 year and I didn't do much it was already done nothing could be done about it and I was stuck not being able to hear any one or any thing for 3 years. it was complete silence."

"so you couldn't hear anything for 3 years?" "yeah." "After the 3 years, what happened?" "Well, my mom was able to afford hearing aids and I was able to hear with them not good but enough so I always turned them on high." "so for the years of silence when people would say you weren't listening it was because you couldn't?" "yeah, basically, and being deaf turned me cold I was rude to my parents my brothers my school mates teacher everyone." "and no one knew?"

''no, I didn't want anyone to know I was so ashamed of being deaf afraid that if they knew I would be treated differently for not being normal." "So how did you know what people were saying when you couldn't hear them?" "Well, my grandfather was deaf and we signed to him and he read our lips. he taught me and my brothers and every one of his children grandchildren every one of our family members to read lips and to use sign language just in case we needed it." "So you always knew how?' "yeah I did but sometimes I just wanted the world to be silent so I just ignored the world but not like it wasn't easy."

"so that's how you got your reputation?" "yeah. I don't blame you if you don't want me anymore I mean no one likes a deaf girl for a girlfriend." "Well, I do and you still beautiful don't be ashamed of it a lot of girls your age and younger are deaf so don't be so hard on yourself." I smiled at him and he kissed me.

after our talk, I felt relieved that he knew now it was the only secret I kept from him that was eating me alive. I got dressed in shorts and a tank top he put on some shorts and we went into the kitchen and made something to eat.

I woke up the next day at 10 and nudged Drew. "hmm?" "get up it's 10." "no I don't wanna!" he sounded like a little kid. "do I have to make you get up?" "I dare you!" I got up out of bed and went to the end of the bed. I filled my hands with the edge of the blanket and ripped them off of him with a smooth whip of the hand. "fine I'm up!' he yelled in defeat. I smiled to myself and went into the kitchen. I made some coffee for him and sat at the table. he came walking in rubbing his hair. "You mean waking up people." I just laughed.

"it got you up didn't it?" "yeah, but you didn't have to pull the covers off." "you dared me to wake you up so I did." "Whatever." he kissed my cheek and got the sugar and milk out. he poured milk and put a spoonful of sugar in it. I already did that for myself. "so what are we going to do today?" "how about we go on a hike?" "sure sounds good." "Where do you want to hike?" "how bout the hills in the back of the housing track?" "Sure." where we lived was in a circle-rowed housing track with mountains in the back.

after our coffee, we got dressed in jeans a short sleeve shirt with climbing boots. we went out and walked to the hills and then for about 20 minutes we hiked up the hill. it was so beautiful when we got up there I'm glad I took my camera with me so I could take pictures. We took pictures of us kissing and hugging all the couple stuff. and looking at the pictures made me happy but the thought of having to go to school tomorrow and dealing with Jackson makes me sad and scared and angry at the same time.

it was Monday one's favorite day. note the sarcasm. I had just gotten to school and already I was talking about the school. hearing whispers from girls and even the guys.

"she's a slut!"

"What a whore."

"guess somebody doesn't like her OWN age."

"wow guess she is into older guys."

"she might as well date my grandpa."

I wanted to say something to them to all of them but I didn't I couldn't. I didn't want to listen to them so I did the only thing I could and muted the world. it was peaceful for once I was happy I was deaf. the whole world was silent. watching people walk past and see them talk without a word made me happy for once. I did what I was supposed to but people would have to either throw something at me or tap my shoulder or wave their hand in front of me so they could get my attention.

people thought I was ignoring them so I put my headphones on and hooked it to my phone so they thought I was listening to music. I couldn't help but feel horrible inside. I felt like what I was doing with Drew was wrong. loving him was something I shouldn't be doing like it was a sin.

Wasn't I an adult it was legal but I don't know why I feel like I shouldn't be with him. maybe I should say something to him. maybe I should tell him that we should take a break until I know how I feel. I put my hearing aids on medium so I could hear people but not well. the bell rang for the end of school and I was happy to leave. I took my car to school since Drew came late. I drove home and got home before drawing. I packed my bags and put them in my car. I drove to my mom's house and knocked on the door. I waited a couple when the door opened.

"Miranda!" Dan said happy to see me. "Mom look!" she came over and her eyes widened when she saw my bags. "what happened between you?!" "nothing i just need some time to think about all of this I just don't know how I feel about this anymore." "well come in we will talk about this more once you get some food in your system because I know you didn't eat at school." I came in and set my bags on the floor and Dan took them up to my old room and went and played video games.

me and my mom sat down on the couch. "so why do you feel this way Miranda i thought you were happy you finally got what you wanted and you love him so why are you having second thoughts now?" "well Mom I mean I do love him its just that kids at school are calling me a whore might as well date a grandpa and more and I can't handle it I try to mute the world but I can't do that forever and I mean drew will be better off someone his own age I mean he is 25 in 18 yes it's legal but I don't feel right." "honey do whatever you feel is right and I will love you and support your answer no matter what it is but you can't hide from drew you need to go talk to him he will be wondering where you are." "no he is working at school until 4." "then go talk to him there." I nodded and got up I went out to my car and started it. I went back to school and it was deserted.

no one in sight. I went to Drew's English class since that is where he mainly works. I opened the door to find Drew with his shirt half opened his belt unbuckled and his hair messed up with a woman on top of him looking the same way. my jaw dropped to the floor and I felt tears come to my eyes but I mean I was here to break up with him anyway so I closed my mouth said nothing and just walked out. I heard the door open and close behind me and running footsteps. " Miranda wait! MIRANDA IT NOT WHAT IT LOOKED LIKE!" by then he caught up to me since I was only walking. "babe please." "no drew! it's fine I don't care I just hope you're happy with her because we are done." "Miranda." "no Drew I was going to talk to you about me wanting to break up because I thought what we have was wrong and I wanted you to be happy without me but I guess you already did that part." "wait you were going to break up with me?!" "maybe maybe not I thought that when I told you we would talk it through and you would make me feel better about loving you but seeing you with that that WHORE just blew it because now I'm done with you!"

I walked away more than angry more than pissed off I was hurt pissed off angry with everything. I got in my car and drove home to my actual home. I got home and I just parked in the driveway. I sat and cried there. this was the worst day ever.

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