The Inseparable Twins

Ian: Getting Ready

We stayed like that for about an hour until I was able to calm down completely. Ever since we were little, things have always been difficult when it comes to a "social" life at school. Even though Yves was considered the weak one out of the both of us, watching him get beat up more often than I did became rather difficult. In the long run, I was the one who became weak and he got stronger. I developed depression in the seventh grade and Yves became my constant support. He continued to take the grunt of the beatings for my sake, just in case if my depression ever got to the breaking point and I would let myself go to them.

My depression has lessened a little bit, but it still gets pretty bad at times. I continuously get nightmares –sometimes even night terrors- and Yves would have to sit with me until I either calmed down or fell back asleep. It's been like that for years now and I wonder to myself if I'm truly a burden to Yves. I feel like I shouldn't even be here, just let everything go and let Mom, Dad, and Yves get on with their lives. Maybe things would be better if I just disappeared. Hell, if I wasn't born, Yves wouldn't have been put through all the tragedy that we were subjected to growing up. It's all because we were twins and the other kids didn't know how to handle that, they thought of us as freaks.

Granted I know that we were both given life for a reason, but I still wish things were different. I wish I could give him his own life. My existence is just a burden to everyone.

I felt hot tears bubble over and roll down my face. I chewed on my bottom lip to keep from letting out any sounds and I felt Yves's arms let got of me and he started pinching my cheeks. My eyes widened as I looked at the smirk of his face: it was a smirk of "stop thinking about that or else." It had a little shadow of mischief behind it too. Looking at him like that sent shivers up my spine.

"Good, that got you to stop crying!" His voice was gentle and the smirk now turned into a sheepish smile. He let go of him cheeks, wiped away the tears and just as he was getting up he tousled my hair even more than it was. I rubbed my cheeks vigorously since they burned where he kept pinching them. I shielded my eyes with my hands as Yves flicked on the bedroom light. I smiled when I noticed the Christmas themed pajama pants he was wearing, I had gotten them for him two years ago when I forgot to get him a gift. There was a matching ugly sweater but that shrunk in the wash a few days later.

We took turns using the bathroom to get ready and Yves was in and out in thirty minutes. When Yves came back into the room he was wearing the school uniform pants and belt and had his undershirt tucked in nicely. I watched him as he styled his hair, parting the bangs to the left and put in four studded earrings in his left ear. If I remember correctly, the stone on his earrings is jet, which is a type of lignite. I get up and walk past him on my way to the bathroom as he puts on his school blazer and insignia pin.

The bathroom was still warm from steam and it felt good on my cold, clammy skin. I took a deep breath, held it for a few seconds and released it. My heart was racing a little bit and taking deep breathes helps to slow it down. I turn the shower knob and while I'm waiting for the water to heat up to how I like it, I wipe the mirror clean of condensation. My face is still bright red and I have dark circles under my eyes, showing signs from lack of sleep. I sigh as I start to feel sick to my stomach, thinking unnecessary thoughts again that could easily send me into a fit of sobbing.

I take off my shirt, pajama shorts and boxer briefs and lazily toss them on the counter. Stepping into the shower, the hot water feels great on my skin. I look down at my stomach and there's a large patch of skin that's already bright red from the hot water and it makes my skin prickle. I rest my head against the wall and lean under the showerhead, exposing my whole body to the water. I feel a shiver run throughout my whole body as it quickly warms up.

After a shot while finishing up my shower, brushing my teeth and blow-drying my hair, I scoot on over to our bedroom to get dressed. Yves is already downstairs fixing up some coffee; I can hear his warm voice chattering with Mom and Dad.

I toss my towel on my bed and I start to rummage around in my dresser for underwear, socks and an undershirt. Guess I should organize it a little better rather than just tossing everything in there when it's clean. I grabbed a pair of black slim slacks, a white collared shirt, purple blazer and the black tie from the closet before I snatched my case that holds my earrings. I bring my bangs to the right and secure them with a bobby pin. I swiftly put on my clothes before heading out the bedroom. I rushed into the kitchen with my socks, tie and case in hand; Mom and Dad greet me warmly. "Good morning, Ian!" They both chime as I flop down at the table next to Yves. "You too." I said to them as I let out a yawn. Mom and Dad went about their way cleaning up the dirty dishes and putting away ingredients for food.

Yves glances at me and hands me half of a muffin in a bag. "This is for you, I had the other half earlier this morning," he spoke before he poured coffee for me in my favorite mug then said "I hope it's okay with you that I had the other half? I didn't think we would be up this early." He handed my mug over to me and pushed the creamer and sugar towards me. I smiled meekly and nodded, "Of course it's okay. Do you think I would actually be mad?" I asked as I poured in a lot of creamer and added a ton of sugar; I like my coffee extra sweet.

Peeking over to the clock above the stove, itwas only seven-thirty; the bus wouldn't be here till eight-fifteen. I slouchedin the chair and just stared at the ceiling.