A Kiss Under The Mistletoe

Chapter 28: Life in Rosy Hues

"I don't want to be at the mercy of my emotions. I want to use them, to enjoy them, and to dominate them."
— Oscar Wilde

My eyes popped out, and I was speechless. What the hell was happening? I tried so hard not to say anything that'll lead in any kind of awkwardness but I think that boat has already sailed when he told me he was in love with me. I gulped.

This is getting so overwhelming.
The one I was crushing so hard.
Luke.
Is in love with me?!
This is horrendous!
Why? I don't know.

Luke, in love, with me.
I tried to process it all over again.

Luke is in love with me.
Those words sinked into me. I should be swooned, but now, it's like I was out of some spell. Some fog lifted out of my mind.

The prospect of Luke in love with me, made me, not like-like him anymore. Made me not to be attractive to him anymore.

This isn't horrendous, this is prosperous! I should celebrate! No more overwhelming feelings! I started to grin like a madwoman.

But then my grin broke off when he vigorously laughed out loud. I got confused. His laughter wasn't like hysterical laughter, but it still blew me off.

"Oh my God! I'm sorry," he said yet muffled with his laughter.

"I'm sorry, you see," he started to say when he was finally done laughing.

"Ron dared me to say "I think I'm in love with you" to you," he said.

And those words crushed me. He continued to talk but I was far away.

"I don't know what got to him to dare me to say that to you. He's acting really weird.

Anyway, like I was saying I want to hangout with you tomorrow. Maybe you're still new at having another friend, you should know that friends hangout with each other, with or without reason." He said in an odd manner.

Yet, I can imagine him smile with his eyes determined to what he was saying.

That smile that curls in the right side first, and then the left will follow. Those intense violet-grey eyes, that makes me want to melt.

I sighed sadly. "Sure, we could hangout." I said in a tight voice.

I feel like I want to cry, right now. But I can't, I don't want Luke to hear my pathetic sobbing.

Hearing that he wasn't really in love with me, that really crushed me. I am so weird. The moment he said those three words, it was like I found the off switch, but now that he didn't mean those three words, the switch went back on and got lost. And now I feel so pathetic and devastated. I felt tears running down my face.

"Okay, great." The moment he said those, I was trying so hard not to weep but one escaped.

"Gwen?"

Muffled with a hiccup I muttered, "yeah?"

"Are you okay?" He asked, it was evident that he was concerned.

"Y-yeah. To-totally fine. Look, I ha-have to go-o." I said and hung up quickly.

I didn't bother cover my mouth anymore, I let myself cry over the fact that Luke doesn't like me the way I like him.

❤️❤️❤️

"When you press me to your heart, I'm in a world apart, a world where roses bloom..." I joined singing Edith Pufi, while tears were slowly getting out of my tear duct. I was laying on my back on the bed, with a hairbrush on my hand, using it as a mic.