Tomorrow and Tomorrow

Chapter 21: chicken pot pie

Alcott had carefully kept the horror from her face, and was glad she did, seeing the genuine remorse from Harper. He was a little late, but he was trying to do the right thing. And anyway she could look at it; there was no right way to handle the situation. Why had Victoria had a gun? It was easy to make her a victim if she hadn't also been armed. Alcott wasn't naïve enough to believe that what Cameron did was defensive, but perhaps, it was still to protect the base against future attacks. Who was to say that Victoria and the others weren't planning something?

She wished that she also had someone to talk this through with, but resolved to keep it to herself. Levi and Walsh had enough on their plates. And she hoped that Harper could talk to Cameron and that it would stop with Victoria. Murder was still wrong and revenge would not bring back Marcus.

Levi met her at the berth, his normal grin replaced with a worried frown.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"Walsh isn't here," he said. "And we didn't see Anatoly all day. Do you think the congress meeting took so long? Do you think they know who did it?"

"Doubtful," Alcott remarked. "All I've heard is rumors, but it doesn't sound like anyone has evidence of anything."

"Sorry, sorry," Walsh called down the hallway. "I would have messaged you that I was running late, but we were in a congress meeting and Dashiell doesn't like it when we work on other things. Though in the case of today, I was this close to walking out anyway."

"Oh?" Levi questioned.

Walsh let them into the berth with sigh. "I'm sorry that Victoria was killed. I know that Ibsen was quite shaken, and Blair is beside himself. But she shot a venting room of people and I just don't feel bad about it. Is Dylan here?"

"Unless she got her before we did, non," Levi replied. "What are we making today?"

"I thought we could try the chicken pot pie with the leftover chicken," Walsh answered. "Alcott, will you check Dylan's room? I didn't see her down in environ when I passed through."

Alcott nodded and walked over to the bedroom door, knocking lightly before entering. Sure enough, there was a figure curled up in bed. Alcott sat down next to Dylan and placed a hand on her shoulder again.

"Hey Dylan," Alcott said. "This earthstorm has been something else, hasn't it? I don't remember the last one being so loud."

Dylan slowly unfolded from her position and sat up. Alcott draped an arm over Dylan's shoulders.

"I heard that Levi made you a print," she commented. "Do you have it here? Can I see it?"

Dylan reached under her pillow and pulled out the thin rectangle. Alcott didn't recognize the poem, but assumed that it had significance for Dylan. The colors around the text were beautiful; Lully had done an excellent job.

"Have you had anything in environ break yet?" Alcott asked, handing the print back to her. "The siding around the garden outside seems to be holding for us, thank the seasons. I would be very upset if that garden blew away."

Dylan nodded.

"They're making chicken pot pie in there," she continued. "You should join us so I'm not the only one who doesn't know what that is."

Dylan shook her head, moving to curl back under the covers. Alcott stopped her, taking Dylan's hands and holding them in hers. Her fingers were pale and cold. Alcott didn't say anything until Dylan finally looked up, meeting her eyes.

"Why not?" Alcott questioned. "What's going on?"

Tears streaked down Dylan's face and she began to sob. Alcott pulled her close and let her cry. Once the tears had subsided, Dylan lifted her head, wiping her face on her sleeve.

"So?" Alcott pressed.

"I don't know what's wrong with me," Dylan whispered. "I want to go out there. I want Levi. I want to go back home. I just...can't. I know that he l...loves me, but I just don't deserve it, and I don't want to break his heart. He's suffered enough."

It was the longest speech anyone had heard Dylan say since Landing Day. Alcott squeezed Dylan in another hug, and then looked her in eye.

"Loving you is Levi's business," she told Dylan seriously. "Neither you, nor I, nor anyone else can dissuade him. The only thing that is going break Levi's heart is you giving up on yourself. Pas mal?"

"Pas mal." Dylan sniffed.

"Now I want you to you out there and eat dinner with us. Let him back in, Dylan."

"And what if I can't?" she whispered.

"Then we try again the next time. And the time after that. And the time after that. Because I'm not abandoning you, and neither is your papa or Levi."

Alcott wasn't certain if she was pushing too fast, but the sooner Dylan and Levi made contact again, the better of both of them would be. Dylan helped Alcott stand and they shuffled to the door together. Dylan hesitated. Alcott waited with her, hoping that Dylan would open the door on her own. Slowly, and with shaky fingers, Dylan slid the door open, blinking at the light from the living room.

Levi and Walsh were standing over the stove, talking quietly. Dylan took one step into the room. In the light, Alcott could see how difficult this was for her. She was trembling; it had to have been at least four weeks since she had interacted with Levi. Alcott didn't say anything as Levi turned from the stove. He was quiet as Dylan and Alcott made their way over to the kitchen.

"How's the chicken pot pie coming?" Alcott finally asked, forcing some cheerfulness into her voice.

"It's weird," Levi said slowly, trying not to stare at Dylan. "It has to thicken and then there's a bottom crust even though I would have thought it would be all soggy. Oh, and the recipe says that's it's excellent in stoneware. They made pans from stone? Wouldn't that be heavy?"

"Probably," she laughed. "Anything we can do?"

"Chop carrots and celery," Walsh said promptly. "I was going to make Levi do it, but now he gets to shred the chicken."

"It's slimy," Levi complained, but hobbled over to the sink to wash his hands.

Walsh passed out knives and vegetables and turned back to the pot. Dylan hadn't said anything but was methodically chopping carrots like her life depended on it. Progress had been made. Alcott gave a warning shake of her braids at Levi who looked like he wanted to speak to Dylan directly. He frowned, glancing hopefully at his partner who didn't look up from her task. He returned to the chicken, and Alcott watched his shoulders fall. It was going to take time, she wanted to tell him. Dylan had been through more than most, and she clearly felt that she was being a burden by breathing. She was fragile and Levi, impatient as he was, was going to have to learn to wait.

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A dark chapter, but a necessary one. Not everyone can overcome such tragedy on their own, and it's important for the others to step up and help Dylan because something people need help and can't ask for it themselves. Levi and Walsh, in someways, are too close to Dylan as she is more afraid of disappointing them than asking them for help. Thank you for reading.