Hello Internet ✹ Phan

Five

I sat up, quietly trying to think of something to say in response.
"I don't.. I don't really have a dad.."

Phil looked at me, confusion taking over his once expressionless face.

"He was never around for holidays....he wasn't around at all, really." I choked on my words, trying not to cry while speaking of the memories. "He wasn't even there for my brother's birth."

"May I ask... Why wasn't he around?"

"He was having an affair. He claimed that he was going out of town for work, but he was sleeping with a twenty year old from France." I looked down in disparity. I never wanted to remember it. "He.."

Phil wrapped his arms around my neck, kissing me gently on the forehead. His skin was warm against mine as we collided into the hug. "He loves you."

"Phil.. I really doubt that.." I broke away from the hug. "He used to b-"

He looked at me with a worried expression, before pulling me back in for a passionate kiss. "Did your mum know?"

"Her too....He got her pregnant with Adrian before leaving and impregnating that slut he cheated with.." I started crying. "Can we not talk about this anymore?"

"Of course.." He held me closely, comforting me. "My mum knows, but my father doesn't know. My brother Martyn does... But I was too scared to come out to my father."

"You were scared?"

"Of course, Danny. It's not the easiest thing to say to the man who raised you to be respectful to women and how to be a man. He always wanted me to be a successful man and have children of my own bloodline for him to have legitimate grandchildren."

I kissed his neck. "Phil.. He'll still love you. Even if he doesn't like it, he will come around."

"I love you, Dan." We laid back down on the blanket.

"I love you, too Philly."

/

We laid in each other's arms, comfortably talking about our future together. That's when I heard a familiar voice.

"Daniel..?"

I sat up quickly. "What the-"

"Dan, what's wrong?" Phil had dozed off, but woke when he heard me.

"It's.. It's been a while, Daniel."

"What the fuck are you doing here?" I got defensive. "You shouldn't be here."

"Can't I go to a beach?"

Phil placed his hand on my back, lightly rubbing. He stayed quiet.

"I mean, why the fuck are you here, talking to me?" I sassed.

"Daniel.."

"Don't fucking call me Daniel. It's Dan." I laid back down, flipping my sunglasses onto my face.

"Dan, that's no way to treat me."

"Yeah, well isn't that hilarious." I said before Phil laid back down by me. "Get to moving.."

"Dan.. I just want to talk to you.."

"About what?" I shot up. "What could you possibly say after such a long fucking time? You miss me? You regret leaving?"

"Danny, should we leave?" Phil whispered.

"Dan, please let me talk to you." The man was extremely persistent. "I called the house, but you weren't there. Your mum said you were living with your friend."

"Boyfriend. With my boyfriend."

"I'm not referring to him as your boyfriend. Anyways, I called your cell, but it didn't go through?"

"Yeah.. I don't have your number blocked or anything.." I said sarcastically. "Oh wait, I do. I downloaded the 'Fuck Off Mate' feature."

"God damn it, Dan. Will you shut the fuck up?" He yelled. I went quiet, feeling like not only was I in danger, but so was Phil.

The man calmed himself after seeing me cower in fear. "Dan... I came back to see you because I heard you guys moved here. Your mum also told me.. You have a br-brother.."

"Yeah, you would've known a long time ago, if you were actually around. You really need to leave me alone now." I felt insecure about this conversation, but I knew what needed to be said.

"I'm sorry.. I'm sorry for disturbing your day." He turned away and started to walk off.
/

"Shit, Dan..." Phil looked at me, scared. "That got really.."

"Emotional? Yeah.." I watched the man walk away. "That's what happens when a cheating father tries to see his son again." I laid back down and closed my eyes.

"Dan, I'm really sorry that happened. I didn't know if I should've said something or.."

"No, Philly. It's fine. It's fine, really. I didn't even know what to say... My anger just found its way out." I assured to Phil that his silence was acceptable.

The man stopped walking and turned back. "Dan, just.. Just one more thing.."

I let out an annoyed grunt.

"Dan, I do care."

"Yeah... About your new woman." I rolled my eyes.

"Dan, for fucks sake. Stop with the attitude. I'm your fucking father."

Phil intervened this time. "Mr Howell, I think it's time you le-"

His words were interrupted by the impact of a fist in his jaw.