On The Run: Part Two

Chapter Twenty-Two - "Jellybeans And Macarons"

He stared curiously at me, hinting at me to expand.

“There isn’t enough time to tell you everything. I’d need . . . weeks.”

His face went ‘Oh.’

“Okay. Just tell me what you can. The ones that stick out.”

I was silent for about five minutes, hoping that Sarah wouldn’t come back. Then, she’d know that she was the reason I couldn’t talk. She might even think that it was out of mistrust. I didn’t know her too well yet, but I didn’t think that mistrust would help with the process.

“The first time was a Tuesday and I’d just come back from detention. It was raining, so I was soaked. He had already started getting a little mean before that, but I never . . .” I sighed, “I got the front carpet soaked from my boots.Stephyelled at me, and I apologized and started to head to my room. I knocked Robert’s coaster over somehow and before I could . . . that was my first black eye. I woke up in a pool of his vomit four hours later.”

“There was another time that week. I had the flu and a really bad headache. He asked me to go get him a six-pack and I did. There was some leftover change, so I got myself a pack of aspirins. I thought he’d be too drunk to notice. I was wrong. He broke one of the bottles against my head. I passed out, woke up in a pool of my own blood. I saw stars for two hours, fourteen minutes and two seconds. Then I had to go back out and get a replacement bottle.”

At this point, I’d forgotten that Jake was in the room. I had my forehead in my hands, leaning my elbows against the cold surface of the table, as I stared down at my legs, seeing nothing but blood and fear.

“Another time, I slipped and fell on his vomit, and he made me pack it up with my hands. When I couldn’t take it any more and threw up, he kicked me in the face, I slammed my head into the wall and passed out.”

“Steph asked me to break into a store this one time, to get her a pack of cigarettes, and when I brought the wrong pack back and Steph started yelling, Robert woke up out of his nap, lit the cigarettes and burned us in the arms, one by one. Steph ran off, so it was like double for me. I think he was venting that month, and it made him feel better.”

“On the anniversary of my parents’ death, I was depressed. I had to do the laundry, and I forgot to take it out when it was done, so he locked me in the cupboard, until I couldn’t breathe, and—”

“Stop.” I heard Sarah’s voice next to me, and I looked up slowly, only then aware that my face was soaked in tears.

Sarah was crouched in front of me, with her jaw clenched and her eyes wide with pain. Jake was nowhere to be seen, and the recorder was gone. I wondered how much time had passed.

“I’m sorry,” I murmured. I wasn’t sure why I was apologizing.

She pulled me to her and hugged me against her chest, my head buried against her shoulder.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered into my hair, and the tears escalated. It was like it was happening all over again and I could feel every burn and every throb and every slam. “I’m so sorry,” she repeated.

And soon, I was literally weeping.

The pain just wouldn’t stop. I felt like it was growing. My heart was tightened and my whole mind was brimming with thoughts that were on a loop.

Sarah leaned back and held my face in her hands, wiping my tears with her thumbs.

“Hey. It’s you and me now, okay? You and me. I’m not going to let anyone hurt you. Never. Okay?” she said, looking into my eyes earnestly, “It’s just you and me, nobody else. You don’t have to say anything anymore.” She wiped my tears, “Stop crying, you’re going to make me cry.”