I Knew I Loved You

Chapter Five: Difficult News

"What did she say?" Manuel encouraged, he wasn't going to be mad either way and he was sure that they would handle whatever came there way and he wanted nothing more than to make this work. 

Charlene chewed on her lip for a moment as she tried to work out how she was going to break the news to him; it was going to be hard especially since it opened the door for more bad news in the future. 

"I'm all good," Charlene whispered with tears in her eyes, there was nothing wrong with her and there was no reason that she could not get pregnant.

Manuel was silent at her words as he processed what she had told him, his hand still firmly holding onto hers as he realised just what this meant for them. 

A lump formed in his throat as he tried to process the fact that Charlene was not the reason why they were struggling to get pregnant. 

It was him. 

He was the reason that after all those years of trying that it just wasn't happening for them, he was the reason that his wife didn't have a baby right now.

 "So, it could be me," Manuel murmured with a shake of his head, he had hoped that it would be something simple but the idea that it was his fault that they hadn't had conceived made his stomach turn so badly that he thought he was going to be sick. 

Charlene didn't say anything, she didn't know what to say to him in comfort; instead, she moved closer and wrapped her arms around him and just held him as they processed the news.

"I'm sorry," Manuel whispered feeling like he had let Charlene down, she had been so worried in the past that it was her doing that they didn't have a child and now he knew how she felt. 

Charlene shook her head gently at him, she didn't blame him for any of this and she wished that she could make this easier for them. 

The couple were silent as they thought about what Manuel's results would say, they both knew that they weren't going to let this stop them from reaching what they both wanted. 

They had talked about this in the past and Charlene knew that this wasn't going to change anything; she kissed the top of Manuel's head as he held her close and buried his head into her neck. 

He didn't care what else had to be said about this, he knew that he would be a father one way or another; it was just about choosing the right path for them. 

Charlene held him as she felt the first tears fall from his eyes, her hold on him only tightening and she wished she could take away his pain. 

Until they had his results, they wouldn't know how bad the situation was and Charlene didn't care what the doctor told them. 

Manuel was everything that she had ever wanted, he was the love of her life and there were many other ways that they could have children together.

***

"Are you okay?" Charlene asked stepping into their bedroom, he was so quiet and she was worried that he might do something stupid like ask for a divorce over results that they weren't 100% on yet. 

It was still a shock and Charlene wished they had all the answers right now but it was something that would take time, all they had to do right now was wait for answers. 

Manuel nodded his head, he had wanted a bit of time to let the idea that he might be the reason that they didn't have a baby settle; he hated that he was letting Charlene down. 

Moving to curl up on the bed with Manuel, Charlene wrapped her arms around him and cuddled him close; she didn't say anything for a while just holding him in her arms. 

"This isn't your fault," Charlene whispered kissing his cheek, her fingers moving to brush through his hair as she rested her head next to his and just held him. 

Manuel nodded his head and looked at Charlene, he wanted to make her happy and he just didn't know how that was going to happen if he was the reason that kept them from having the family that they wanted. 

"We'll work this out," Charlene encouraged wanting her husband to snap out of this, she brushed her fingers through his hair and kissed him wanting him to be okay and know that she did not blame this on him. 

Sometimes these things just happened and Charlene could never blame this on Manuel when he wasn't at fault; it was just one of those things and they weren't going to give up on their dreams. 

Whatever happened, Charlene was here with him and she wouldn't leave; even if that meant giving up on the dream of having a family with him. 

Manuel kissed Charlene back, she was right that they would work this out but he just couldn't wrap his head around the fact that there could be something wrong with him. 

They would just have to decide what they were going to do when Manuel's results came in; they had a little while to decide on what their next step might be. 

"I love you," Charlene reassured, she didn't care what happened to them in the future and she wanted nothing more than to enjoy what they had right now. 

Manuel was due to re-join Germany soon and then he would be off to the Euros, it would be a while before the two of them would be together again without anything to worry about.