For the Insecurity (MakoHaru AU)

Chapter 3- 9.7.15

Again, Haru's face flashed in Makoto's mind. Enough with the crybaby! Hell like I'm going to ask him for help.

Makoto sighed, frustrated. He didn't, and couldn't, keep putting on his front forever.

See, the brunette really had a kind heart. In middle school, he was kind to everybody and thus gained a lot of attention. But not all of that attention was good.

On the last year of middle school, a gang came to pick on Makoto. After that day, Makoto decided that his kind side was also his weak side, so he decided that he couldn't show anybody his 'weak' side. Instead, he put up a front. 

In front of everybody that he was insecure about, he was a bully. That way, nobody would try to hurt him. The brunette didn't like being mean, but to him, it seemed as if he didn't have a choice.

But I can't keep on hiding forever... what will I do?

--

"Mother, Father, I'm home!" Haru called, snuggling with Makoto's jacket as he entered his house.

"Whose jacket is that?" Haru's mom asked, snatching it away from the dark-haired boy.

"I got it from a friend of mine," Haru explained, trying to maintain his smile.

"Friend?" Haruka's mom laughed. "This is the first day of school. You can't manage to make friends at the first day of school!"

"But I... I made three."

"Pfft! Those are fake friends. They won't help you anywhere in life."

"But... he gave me his jacket."

"It's probably stained with sleeping poison or something," Haru's mom insisted, sniffing the jacket. "Disgrace! It smells like kumquats!"

"What's wrong with kumquats? I think they smell very nice."

"A kumquat is another word to call a young individual who goes through life constantly disappointing people with his infinite failures."

"Makoto is anything but a failure," Haru defended.

"Isn't Makoto a girl name?" Haru's mom asked.

"Isn't Haruka a girl name?"

"That's true, dear." Haru's mom sighed, petting Haru's head. "You know, I've always wanted a girl."

Oh no, not this conversation again, Haru shivered.

"I was extremely happy when the doctors said I was going to get a girl. But on your birth day, you came out as a boy. Your father restrained me from getting rid of you. The least you could do for me, because I spared your life, is at least act like a girl. But even if I refused to send you to the barber shop so your hair could grow beautiful locks, you somehow wind up being able to cut your own hair."

Haru hung his head down. He could no longer smile. Makoto's jacket and his scent was fading away from him, and that was the only thing keeping him happy at the moment.

"When I told you if you continued to act like a boy, I wouldn't feed you anymore, yet you were somehow was able to live off rice and canned mackerel for over a month! Why, Haruka, why are you like this?"

Don't call me by my real name.

"Why can't you be the daughter I raised you to be, Haruka?"

I hate my real name.

Haru's mom lifted his chin, so Haru could see the calm, yet somehow threatening smile on her face. Haru's smile had vanished, and all he had left was the same monotone face he had always given to everyone. 

"Haruka," His mom whispered, combing his hair. "I can't bring myself to hurt you. Be a good girl, Haruka."

Stop. Please stop. I hate my name. I hate it so much.

Haru's mom sighed, realizing that she wasn't going to go anymore with Haru's bland expression. She tossed Makoto's jacket at Haru and walked away.

Haru caught the jacket and stared at it. Even with Makoto's scent, he couldn't bring himself to smile.

Not after that devious one-sided conversation he had with his mother.

--

...Hey it's Saki, I'm so sorry this is so confusing. I had like three different parts, four including this one. Just know that '--' means a change in setting or time.

And yes, this chapter is extremely crucial, since it tells the backstory of Makoto, along with Haru's home problems. This also shows their other side (otherwise known as Makoto's 'insecure' soft side and Haru's 'front' monotone side)

Oh yes, I stole Haru's mom's personality from Nagisa Shoita's mom from Assassination Classroom. I felt as if that would teach Haru how to take care of himself.

Thanks for putting up with me ahahah, see you next chapter!