Insecure |Phan|

Chapter 3

Dan stood there in absolute, forsaken shock. His lips were molded into a parted expression, his heart beating rapidly, whilst his mind raced at a million miles per hour. 

  He didn't know it was possible to feel this ecstatic feeling, this euphoria, from those simple words. 

He didn't, he couldn't comprehend it.

No, but it wasn't just the words that had affected him. It was who it was coming from. 

Phil, to Dan, seemed like nothing but a gift sent from heaven. An intricate ornament sent form above, sent on a mission to cure the evil and bad from this world. 

If only that were actually possible.

He seemed too pure for this cruel world, as if he was completely oblivious to the embedded darkness within it.

Dan had only known him for a few quick, fleeting moments, and yet he never quite reached the opportunity to fully immerse himself in Phil's beauty.

His floating thoughts lost a chance to last long, however, as Dan heard a painfully familiar voice skewing through the thick air.

"Oi fag! What you doing' standing' around in the hallways like a freak?"

Dan let out a breathy sigh and turned his gaze to his side momentarily, to confirm that Phil wasn't here to witness what was coming next.

He wasn't there.

'Thank god", Dan mentally uttered to himself, "He won't be here for the beating. He won't have to witness me shriveled up in the corner like a fucking pathetic freak, and he won't have to pity me like everyone else does. He won't have to worry about me, although I doubt he even would", Dan scoffed out loud, reprimanding his own wandering thoughts. "Hell, even I wouldn't care about a loser like me."

Dan was cut off from his thoughts with a sharp blow on the back of his shoulder.

A series of punches ensued and Dan stumbled to the ground and let out a whimper in pain.

"That's what you get for being a fag." the broad-shouldered, blonde one cackled. "We saw you talking' to that new kid. You like him, don't ya?" Another rib-shattering punch followed. "Well, don't get your hopes up, Danny boy, he ain't a fag like you." 

Silent tears escaped Dan's eyes and onto his red cheeks. Dan knew they were right, even though the physical pain surging through his limp body combined with the self-degrading thoughts didn't help Dan's will to stop his salty tears flowing down his face.

They were right. I didn't deserve to even talk to Phil. He was such a beautiful person, and I'm nothing but a complete mess.

Another brown-haired jock dug his foot into Dan's stomach a few times, making Dan cry out in pain, until Dan was nothing but a bruised and crumpled mess on the school grounds, curled up against the lockers.

The late bell let out its shrilling ring, and all the guys diffused into their classrooms, leaving Dan on the marbled floor, bleeding from his fresh wounds and raw cuts, and battered with bruises. 

Dan sighed, trembling, and let a tear fall down his cheek. He let out a choked sob that sent a stabbing pain shooting through his bruised ribs.

As he sat on the ground, alone, tasting the salty blood on his lip, burying his head between his knees which were pulled up to chest, shaking with broken sobs, he let the world fade into black once again...

~~~

It was cold, as if he were being drowned into the rolling waves of the ocean, and there was no escape. However, as Dan slipped slowly back into consciousness, he could feel the texture of the cold tile floor underneath his aching legs.