Ek se Mohabbat, Dusre se Ishq

Chapter 7 - Unexpected Harkatein

"Woh sab chhod, tumne mujhe kyun nahi bataya ki tumhari shaadi hui hai? I would've kept my distance from you if you'd told me" He sat back upright on the sofa, buttoning up his shirt again as i sat next to him.

"Mann nahi tha..." i looked away,  I didn't want to tell him because then he would've tried calling my husband up or even my in-laws. I didn't know what sort of guy he was, telling him that I was married could end up in any situation and i wasn't going to take any chances.

"Fir bhi ishita, i could've called someone from your family up if you had told me na" He said exactly what I expected. "...otherwise i wouldn't dare getting that close like that to a married woman."

That, I wasn't expecting. There was part of me that didn't believe him, but also a part of me that had full faith in him.

" how close?"

"closer than this." he said as he leant in towards me.

"closer than this?"

"way closer than this."

We were closer than ever, his forehead touched mine, our noses were barely even 1 centimetre apart, and we could hear each other's deep breathing and feel the warm breath on both our faces. It had become difficult to breathe in that moment, it was like suffocating, but not exactly. I liked this type of feeling. I didn't want to be pulled away from that moment. My face was heating up and had become quite red in the heat of the moment.

Even though we were that close, he seemed to get closer and closer by the minute; until finally, i closed my eyes and he kissed me. His kiss was soft on my lips, it wasn't forced on me, it was more like a peck. Out of shock, I didn't respond to it. I felt bad that I may have made him feel rejected somehow, but that wasn't my intention at all.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have kissed you, you're married. It wasn't right." He looked on in surprise as if he'd committed a crime.

"Yeah I'm sorry too."

"For what? I was the one that kissed you, not the other way around."

"For being married." That was when i leant back in quickly to kiss him back with a little more passion and he responded as he slid his hands around my bare waist dand as I put my hands around his neck whilst my back was gently laid down onto the sofa with his body on top of me.

"Ouchh!" A sharp pain went through my thigh as if it had been stretched too much. I got up quickly to sit upright to support my leg. Tabhi ko dard hona tha? Mourat nikaal na padega yeh bande ke saath waqt bitaane.

"Ishita? Kya hua? Did I hurt you? Fir se dard ho raha hai kya? Aakhri baar tune balm kab lagaya tha?"

"No no it's just my leg, kal raat toh lagaya tha" I mumbled whilst in severe pain, mere liye meri zindagi kuch khaas nahi tha lekin uske aankhon mein dekhke dikhaye deta tha, that my life was more precious to him than to me. 

"Subhe mein nahi lagaya tha?"

"Nahi toh. Subhe subhe mein wo aa gaye the na. Woh sab chhodo, pair mein bohut zyada dard ho raha hai yaar, balm do na." COULD HE JUST STOP TALKING FOR A FUCKING MINUTE AND GIVE ME THE BALM?

"Naalayak aurat. Koi bhi kaam akele dhang se nahi kar sakti." Wahh, gaaliyaan dene lage...

"Main?! Bade aaye kaam waale! Toh tumhare kehne ka yeh matlab hai ki tum sab kaam khud kar sakte ho?"

"Haanji..."

"Toh phir you can put your balm on your back by yourself na? You don't need me or anyone else to apply for you then?"

"No...I don't need anyone else to do it for me."

"I knew it."

"I only need you." He leaned forward and whispered into my ear.

I never realised when he had applied the balm onto my leg and massaged it so well that there was no pain at all left to moan about. He was like an angel, he could make all my pain go away just like that.

He got up and was just about to walk away but then I stopped him grabbing his wrist and looked up into his eyes and got up slowly, pulling him a little closer to me.

"I need you too." I whispered back into his ear and lowered my eyes, as if out of shame but i wasn't ashamed of anything.

He came into my embrace and hugged me

"I love you Ishita." He whispered into my ear and nuzzled his nose into my neck, brushing his lips softly.

I hadn't heard or said those three words from a guy in a long time. Not since my ex. I wasn't sure if I was ready to put that trust into someone again. It hurt a lot when he left me for the typical reason. "It's not you. It's me"
I wasn't sure if I could love again, it was difficult for me to barely even speak to men in general.

I broke the hug and looked deeply into his eyes to see if he meant what he said, amma always said that eyes could never lie even though words might, and every time, she's been right, so why wouldn't she been right now? I kept looking for that passion that Subbu once had in his eyes that was now lost, in Raman's eyes and it just wasn't there. I couldn't find that honesty of his words anywhere. He didn't mean it.

My eyes started tearing up because of the fact that yet another guy had twisted themselves into being a part of my life and again been broken. How could I have let that happen? I didn't know what to feel. My heart and mind were arguing over him. My mind argued that he's just another guy that shouldn't mean anything to me and that if I even gave him a chance, he'd take advantage of it, just like Subbu did. My heart argued that not every guy was the same, I couldn't believe that I thought he was different. The story of every girl. I didn't know what to think or say to him. I looked away wiping my tears for a second and I tried to face him again, looking at him hiding my mixed emotions. I couldn't barely look him in the eye, let alone speak to him. I just didn't have it in me anymore. I walked away from him, going back into the room, leaving him puzzled. Didn't want to think, didn't want to know, didn't want to feel. It hurt too much.