Black on Pastel <Vkook>

10. Attempted and failed

The room was slightly less bright when Taehyung woke up. There was no more sunshine through the windows. The only light came from the three bulbs that were fixed on the high ceiling.

Taehyung's eyes soon opened wide enough to see Jungkook, sitting on the bed next to him criss-crossed. His face was fixed on the sketchbook in his lap and eraser shavings littered the sheets under him. His black hair almost covered his eyes. His face looked focused, but also rather flustered, but Taehyung couldn't help but smile. Jungkook at work was such a captivating sight.

"Jungkook?" He said with a tired and raspy voice.

Jungkook looked up, surprised and held the book close to his chest.

"What time is it?"

Jungkook looked at the clock on his nightstand.

"A little past 1am," he said softly.

Taehyung nodded. Had he really been here that long? Jungkook's attention once again was back on the notebook and Taehyung noticed he was tense. His eyes looked a bit watery and the hand holding a slightly shortened pencil was shaking. He most definitely didn't look alright. It looked like he was about to cry.

"What are you drawing?" Taehyung said sitting up, hoping to get a glimpse of another one of Jungkook's pieces. But the younger backed away frantically.

"I-I-it's nothing," the younger stuttered, clutching the sketchbook to his chest. His face held an expression Taehyung had never seen before and he knew something wasn't right.

"Let me see," he said, reaching for the book. He quickly pulled it down from Jungkook's grasp and won a surprising sight.

What he saw was a sketch of himself sleeping.

It looked exactly like him in every way. The proportions and shading were absolutely perfect. Taehyung thought it might have even looked more attractive than he did himself. Every freckle and crevice were spot on. It was amazing.

But the view was quickly ruined.

"No!" A voice yelled. Jungkook grabbed the book out of Taehyungs hands, followed by a grey scribble led by his nimble fingers, all over the paper.

Taehyung looked up at the dark haired boy with wide eyes. He was in shock to find Jungkook completely in tears and clenched teeth. His forearm was moving rapidly as the pencil left thick lines over the sketch that used to be of Taehyung, but was now an incomprehensible blob of dark grey.

"Jungkook stop!"Taehyung urged. But he didn't. He kept going at that sheet of paper until nothing underneath the new markings were seen. The raven haired boy scribbled and scribbled until the paper started ripping.

Taehyung decided to take the situation into his own hands when he grabbed Jungkook by the wrist while simultaneously tossing the sketchbook on the ground beside the bed. He then pulled a shaking boy into his arms tightly, hoping to calm him down.

He had no idea where this outbreak came from. Earlier he was totally fine. Happy even. What about that drawing caused him to destroy it like that.

"Calm down," he whispered as Jungkook shook in his arms. What came out of the smallers mouth was unexpected. It was hoarse scream that sounded like pure and utter pain. Taehyung couldn't hold back the tears welling up in his eyes either as he saw his idol in a state like this.

"I tried 3 hours to fix it and I just could get it right!" Jungkook screamed out.

The words were almost not even words. Taehyung could just barely understand him.

"It looked so bad. I tried so hard but it was still just shit!"

Jungkook wrapped his arms around Taehyung's neck and sobbed into his collar bone. Taehyung soon understood that this was the anxiety attack he had been worried about earlier. He realized that Jungkook saw flaws in the sketch, even though he saw it as absolutely perfect. He didn't dare say it though. He didn't want to make him feel even worse. All he knew how to do at this point was whisper a chorus of "it's okay"s into Jungkook's ear.

He rubbed circles on the boys back with his long fingers. He began to calm down but his breaths became choppy. Taehyung held him tighter. He could feel the wetness on his neck from Jungkook's tears as he shifted his head.

"Shhhh," he quietly said, "deep breaths."

And after a while the shaking had stopped. The two now sat in silence. Jungkook was In between Taehyung's thighs, his arms still around his neck as Taehyungs were around his middle, continuing to caress his back.

Taehyung felt fingers fiddling with the hair on the back of his head, which made him feel better.

"Tae?" Jungkook said softly.

"Hmm?" The older hummed in response.

"Thank you."

"For what?"

Jungkook escaped the embrace and wiped his face, but he stayed in the close proximity to Taehyung. He looked down at his hands when he spoke.

"You're the first friend I've made since moving here. I was so insanely lonely. Like I literally have one friend and he's back home. I've only known you for two days and you've already done more for me than almost anyone has in my entire life."
He paused and sniffled.

"You're kinda like my savior," he chuckled under his breath, "honestly at this point I don't know how I survived here before you came along. You're the best thing that's happened to me in a long time. Better than getting a call from an art gallery. Better than having my art in the same building as Andy Warhol. Better than moving to my favorite city on the entire planet. You beat them all."
Jungkook looked up at Taehyung. There were still tears lingering in his eyes. Taehyung could tell this was something that happened often.

"You're my muse Taehyung."

He didn't believe the words that came from Jungkook's mouth. Best thing that happened to him. Better than his dream job in his dream city. His muse. His heart was flying. It was like having an out of body experience. Something unimaginable and unexplainable. What was he feeling? His chest and head were fuzzy and everything around him seemed to disappear except for the one sitting before him. His was infatuated with him. That what it was. He knew now. It was love. He had fallen in love with the one whose art made him feel incredible things for years on end. And now, the artist himself made him develop strong feelings as well, but these feelings were stronger than any other work of art could conjure up. It was love.

Taehyung brushed the black hair out of Jungkook's eyes before cupping his face in his hands. He brought his face incredibly close to the others until he could feel Jungkook's breath on his cheek. As he went to connect his lips with Jungkook's soft pink ones, he was faced with disappointment. Taehyung's mouth softly and gently collided with Jungkook's cheek as the younger had turned his head, avoiding the kiss from the tall brunette.

He pulled away, embarrassed. His cheeks sported a red tint and he sat back away from Jungkook. There was a long awkward silence.

Jungkook hadn't expected something like this. As greatful as he was for Taehyung, he didn't have those types of feelings for him. He was just a friend. A really good friend. A friend who happened to be the very inspiration for his art. A friend who happened to be the light of his whole world. A person who finally made him happy. But he couldn't return the same feelings Taehyung had for him.

"S-sorry..." Jungkook shyly apologized.

Taehyung had instantly regretted what he did and he was almost hurt, but told himself not to be since he should've known that Jungkook did not feel the same way as him.

"No. I'm sorry," Taehyung said, "I shouldn't have-" his lips were met by Jungkook's finger tips and he shook his head. He then pulled the covers down on the bed and crawled underneath them and urged Taehyung to as well. He hesitantly followed the younger, not sure what was happening. Then, Jungkook rested his head on Taehyung's chest and wrapped his arms around his torso. Before Taehyung had realized it, the boy was asleep.

He couldn't help but think,

What is going on in this boys head?

+

This is one of my favorite chapters.

Okay bye