Still Into You

Three

Three





My head felt like I was run by a truck when my alarm woke me up. I reached for it blindly and just throw the thing on the floor to silence it. I'm never a violent person, that was more on my brother's department, but I feel so angry and frustrated with myself. I felt stupid for not listening to my brother and my best friend when they warned me about 'he-who-should-not-be-named'.



I turned in my bed, feeling for the first time, the emptiness of it. I threw his things outside the apartment without caring whether it got stolen or not. In the middle of the night, the door bell rang endlessly for an hour. I ignored it knowing that it was him; so, I covered my ears, waiting for him to stop and go away. When it did, I went back to sleep like nothing happened.



After I dragged myself to the bathroom and change for work, I didn't bother making myself breakfast and went straight downstairs to my car. On my drive to work, slightly early, I stop by a coffee shop just a few blocks from the company building. I ordered my choice of comfort drink, caramel macchiato, and got out of there without a second notice, or so I thought. I was so busy checking the messages on my phone, as I silently walked towards the door, that I didn't notice a person in front of me. We collided lightly, not hard enough to knock the coffee off my hand.



"I'm so sorry... I wasn't looking where I was going..." I said steadying myself as I check my shirt whether it got coffee stains.



"Why do we always meet in situations like this?" a deep, husky voice asked and chuckled. This is one of the voices in the world that I - involuntarily - could pin point in a crowd of people.



"We've only meet twice, Logan. Yesterday and now..." I stated and look up, meeting his gaze.



The moment that I met his eyes, I regretted that I dared myself to look. His eyes were the same as it was eight years ago. The shade of the deep, blue Caribbean Sea on midday; it was so easily to get lost in those eyes. It felt like I was the same girl eight years ago, a girl who was scared and preoccupied about her future plans. Looking at those eyes, it made me think of the one thing I've regretted these past eight years. But, I wasn't the same girl; I'm a woman of a professional status, who is independent and strong with the future already in my gasp.



"You don't have to point that out, unless you are counting..." he said, looking amused at my reply as he continued to hold my gaze.



"I only hope this would be the last."I stated sternly as I begrudgingly took my eye away from those eyes. "I'm sorry about bumping you, I'll sure watch where I am going next time..." I added as I took a step sideways towards the door. "Well, got to run. I'm late for work." I said walking a few steps away. I turned around and pushed the door, getting out of there before he could say a reply.



It was killing me not to look back as I was walking to the building across, which is where I park my car for awhile to get my coffee. When I was behind the dark tinted window inside, I couldn't help but glance at the coffee shop for a moment. Logan was just about to get out of the store when he bumped into a girl, which he seemed to know from the huge smile plastered in his face. He handed the girl the other coffee he was holding, and then they walked side by side towards the upper side of the city.



I was stunned by what I saw. I sat inside my car for a few minutes before I could gather myself and start the car and drive that few blocks to work. I couldn't help but think about who was that girl with him. Maybe she was his girl friend, since I know he is an only child so that wouldn't be anyone related to him, or a friend. I doubt that the girl was just a friend from the huge smile that was plastered on his face. I contemplated and thought about this until I reached my office. I was slightly shock when Kate kept on waving her hands in front of me as I pass by her.



"Hello? Ms. Coleman? Are you sleep walking?" she asked.



"Kate... Uhm... do you have messages for me today?" I asked, startled at her sudden closeness.



"Yeah... you have a message from the photographer about the shoot two days from now, and a call from Ms. Annette." She said, as she hands me some files.



"Oh... Okay. What did Anne want?" I asked, taking the files from her.



"She wants you to call her since you didn't answer any of her text last night and this morning." She replied, her voice slightly off key.



I turned to look at her, suspicious. Kate look nervous and worried, like she knew what was happening. Then, it clicked. "Did Anne tell you about the breakup?" I asked accusingly.



"I'm sorry, Ms. Coleman. I didn't say a word about it to anyone, I promise... She kept on babbling about it on the phone..." she admitted sheepishly.



I gave her a soft smile, feeling sorry that I made her feel uncomfortable. "It's Okay, Kate. Thank you for everything." I said calmly and entered my office.



I put down my things on my table with much force than intended, feeling the irritation raising up within me. I was so pissed at Annette for blurring out information about my recently - just yesterday recent - break-up to my assistant. She was crossing the line on that, but I couldn't let her take all the blame. I did walk out on her without a word and slammed the door in her face. I mean, what did she expect? I was in pain. She didn't have an excuse for such actions.



I pick up my phone and dialed her number. After the second ring, she finally picked up. "What the heck are you thinking? You don't have a right to tell people about my recent break-up! Sure, you are my best friend/ sister-in-law! But, I don't give a damn about that! You know I don't like people talking about my personal life, especially a break-up!" I shouted directly, not letting her say a word. Then, after I've finally let off steam, I ended the call without hearing her answer. I love Annette so much, but I wasn't in the mood to talk or hear about anything that involves my recent break-up.



After I did that deed, I took a deep breath to settle myself down. Then, I literally threw myself with work and nothing more. I even skipped lunch and munched a granola bar to keep me going. I isolated myself in my office for the whole day, turning off one of my phone which was for personal use. I only took calls for business and nothing else, even when my brother phones me; I ignored everything and concentrated on work. I know it's unhealthy to be a workaholic, but after three failed relationship where all men cheated on me, and I still didn't learn my lesson, my work is the only sane thing in my life after each break-up. I know in a week or so, maybe a month after, I would recover from it. But, right now, I wanted to numb that feeling and do what I know I do best; work my a** off.



I didn't know how long I was there inside my office or what time of the day it was. I didn't care much about any of that, I felt like not caring on anything in that moment. When I glance down on my wrist watch, I was startled to see the time, it almost ten in the evening. I stood up from my chair and took a peek outside my office, the place was empty and only the lights leading to the elevator where on. I got back inside my office and got my things. I walked at a fast pace towards the elevator, not daring to look back at the dark empty office behind me. When I was safely at the lobby, I heave out a huge sigh.



As I walked the short distance towards my car, I stop for a moment as my private phone vibrates endlessly after I hesitantly turn it on. I ignored it and continued walking. The drive back to my apartment, since I kick my cheating ex-boyfriend out last night, was too silent for my comfort. So, I turned the radio on and then the music blast around the close space of my car.



"I should be over all the butterflies... I'm in to you..." I sang along to the song being played and bobbed my head while I'm at it.



In that moment, I could care less about my personal life. "Screw you, Daniel! You f*ck'n douche bag! You were just good in bed and easy in the eyes! Dumbest person I've ever met!" I shouted, letting out all my frustrations. "And, you Logan! Well, screw you too! Mister you-think-you-have-me-figure-out... Well, go figure that out yourself!"



I continued shouting at nothing as I drove to my apartment, not seeing a thing in front of me. From there, everything happened so fast. When the traffic light turned green, I was too frustrated at everything that I forgot to glance around and check for cars. I stepped on the gas pedal and reached the middle of the street when a bright light surprised me on my right side, running so fast I couldn't react to it. The next thing I knew, my car collided hard with a truck pushing it all the way to the sidewalk across the street and out of the streets towards the nearest pole. Because of the impact, the air bag exploded, knocking my head back and blurring my vision.



When I was slighty conscious of my surrounding, all I can hear was a ring in my ear and I was seeing blots of gray as I open my eyes. After that, a sudden pain in my head and leg started to throb, hitting me with so much force. I wanted to scream but my throat felt dry. Then, out of exhaustion, I felt myself spiral down in a void of darkness, and everything went black from there.



I didn't know how long I was out, but I felt a sudden jostle in my arms as warm hands slightly caress it. Then, an arm put me in an embrace as I crushed to a solid body and felt someone drag me away from my seating position. After that, I felt being put down on something stiff. I opened my eyes, wanting to know what was happening around me, but my eyelids were heavy, so I could only make out a few thing. The first thing I saw was a dark hair leaning down beside my cheeks and as it pull away from me, I saw a familiar deep, Caribbean blue eyes, staring at me with desperation. I wanted to reach out my hand to it but my hand felt like it weighed a thousand pounds at that moment. So, I stared at it for as long as my eyes can open until it closes back again.



The ringing in my ear stopped as I heard a metal door close behind me. Yet, I couldn't make out the noises around me. I knew that the noise is from a person talking, well more like shouting franticly with annoyance about something. Then, slowly, the words became clear in my ears.



"... Did you place the IV fluid already? Is her pulse stable? How bad are her injuries?" a deep, husky voice asked, as it quivered with worry.



Somehow, the voice was familiar to me but I couldn't pin point whose it was since the pain started to worsen. When my conciousness slowly came back, it made me aware of the many parts of my body that is in pain, I clinched my hand in to a first, trying to not scream from it. And, from doing so, the people who were with me knew that I was awake.



"Ally? Ally? Are you awake? Are you alright?" the deep husky voice asked as a hand squeezes mine lightly.



"Would... would you stop shouting? You'll make it hard... hard for me to concentrate on... on not feeling the pain..." I stated my voice soft as I paused to clear my dry throat.



"God... Ally... you had me there..." the deep husky voice said, sighing in relief.



I wanted to ask who he was, but I felt myself drown in darkness again. I didn't try and fight it since it slowly helped ease out the pain. So, I let myself fall in to it and let myself sleep. Though I was nearly in the edge of unconsciousness, I could still feel the hand that was holding mine tightly, squeezing it softly before it intertwined with my hand.



When I woke up again, the first thing I felt was that my body feels numb, then a bright light made me squint my eyes as it readjust to it soundings; after which, I heard someone stood up and said to someone about me being awake.



"Al... hey... how are feeling?" a person in a white, long lab coat walked up to me. When my eyes settled, I saw that it was Tristan, looking worried and slightly pained about something.



"Why are you looking at me like you're about to tell me something awful? Is it that awful?" I asked him, my voice horse and dry.



"Here's a water Ally..." I turned my gaze to the other person beside me, Annette, who looked the same as Tristan as she handed me a glass of water.



"Anne... Oh my gosh... About yesterday... I'm so sorry... I didn't mean..." I said as I remember the thing I said to her on the phone. I handed her back the half empty glass of water, which she took directly.



"Ally, its okay... I understand that you were frustrated and sad and you need to let off steam... I was being pushy and self-centered to not have given you any space... I should be the one saying sorry to you..." she stated softly, putting the glass on the bedside table.



"You know I can never be mad at you forever..." I stated, feeling a tear in my eyes. "Come here and give me a hug." I added, opening up my sore arm widely.



Annette looked at me for a moment, debating whether to accept the hug or not, but she reached out and gave me one anyway. After a few seconds of it, she let go of the hug slowly as she help me lean back in bed. I flinched at the slight pain that I now notice. For the first time, I gave a slow assessment of myself, seeing a cast on my left arm and a bandage on my right leg, and a few other scratches here and there; this could have been worst.



"So, what's the doctor's assessment? How bad in shape am I?" I asked as I reach for the pitcher of water, which Annette handed to me when she realizes what I was doing.



"Well, why don't you ask him yourself since he'll be here any minute." Tristan said, smirking about something.



I eyed him questioning. "Is there something I need to know that you're hiding from me?" I asked him accusingly.



"You'll find out soon enough." He stated smiling slyly.



I turn my attention to Annette, who was smirking at Tristan. "Anne? You're not telling me?" I asked, feeling betrayed.



"Sorry... I just want to see your expression when you see it... I don't want to ruin the surprise..." she said sheepishly.



Before I could say anything to get her to tell me, the door suddenly opens, revealing a dark brown haired man in a long, white lab coat, looking down at a clipboard as he wrote down something. "How is she?" the guy asked as he looks up, finally giving me a better view of his face.



"Oh! You've got to be kidding me!" I exclaimed, and punched my injured left hand to the railings, which made me hiss in pain. "Aw."



"This really doesn't look bad, Ally, compared to your condition now..." Annette offered, smiling at me weakly.



"Really?" I asked sarcasm thick in my voice. "How is this any better?" I added, gesturing towards Logan, who looked confused.



"Al, humor me. Don't be a pain and let the guy do his work." Tristan interjected, walking towards my side where Annette stood.



I eyed him evilly, knowing that he might be behind all of this. But before I could say a thing and accuse him, he interjected me again. "Annie, I think we should leave the doctor to his work and have him check my sister in peace. Let's step out and grab something to eat." Tristan said to Annette, guiding her slowly out of the room.



Annette looked at me for a moment as I held her gaze, trying to tell her to stay, but Tristan pushed her and guided her out before I could start with persuading her verbally. As that was happening, Logan didn't say anything and stood by the foot of my bed, watching us. A few seconds after Annette and Tristan went out, he clear his throat to get my attention.



"So... How are you feeling?" he asked, walking towards my side slowly, clipboard in hand.



I turned to look at him begrudgingly like it wasn't obvious. "Do I look fine to you?" I asked, my voice sounding slightly rude.



"Right. Wrong question... Uhm... Do you feel any pain anywhere?" he stated, looking down at his clipboard nervously and pause to asked me another question.



I looked away from him as he glances back at me to hear my answer. "I feel numb. And, if you guys put any medicine to keep it that way... I say, do continue..." I stated monotonously.



"Okay. Pain meds. Got it." he stated softly as he jotted it down in his clipboard.



"Tell me. Why are you my doctor?" I asked him straight, looking back at him.



He stared at me for a moment and then sighed as he put his clipboard at the pocket of his coat. "Tristan asked me personally to attend to you. When he heard that you got into a car accident, he didn't have anyone who he can trust you with, then he knew I just transferred here so he called." He explained his voice soft and calm.



"Bull. Tristan used to work here as a medical specialist. He knows a lot of doctor. Now, why would he choose you?" I asked, annoyed by the lie.



The room is engulf with silence as we both stared into each other's eyes. I don't know how long we stayed that way, but it was long enough for Annette to get back and interrupt our staring competition.



"Hey, I'm back. I brought you your favorite dessert..." Annette started but trailed off as she met both of our gazes. "Am I interrupting something?" she asked after glancing between me and Logan.



"No. We're just finishing up with something... A nurse with be here to give Ms. Coleman her pain medication." He said his voice and face mask with professionalism as he slowly walk towards the door. He turned back toward us and nods his head slightly before stepping out of the room.



Annette turned to me, her eyes filled with suspicion. "What did you say to him?" she asked accusingly.



"What? You're just going to accuse me? Maybe he's the one who said something to me..." I said, feeling slightly hurt by her assumption, though it wasn't slightly off the mark.



"I know you, Ally. So, cut the act and do tell..." she sighed heavily and nodded in disagreement, eying me her don't-give-me-crap look.



"Okay... I may or may not have said some things rude..." I trailed off as I confessed, looking down at my blanket, playing with it on my hands.



"Why do you feel threaten by this guy? I thought you were over him long, long ago..." she asked, her lips slightly twitch into a smirk.



"I'm not threaten!" I exclaimed, slightly shocked at her words.



"Really? Do you have to overreact when I mention feeling threaten?" she asked, after which she chuckled softly as she looked at me.



I eyed her sternly. "Don't try and twist everything, Anne. This is not funny at all..." I said, looking at her seriously.



"Right... okay..." she pronounced each word sarcastically as she rolled her eyes. She let out a few more chuckles after and drops the topic.



One of the many things why Annette and I stayed long in this friendship was that we both respected each other. If there is something we both don't want to talk about, we both don't pry on each other to get the information out. We just let each other decide whether she is ready to tell the other or not. We are like men, but we watch reality TV than the sports channel.



For the rest of the day, Annette accompanied me in the hospital until around seven in the evening. My brother dropped by around that time to check up on me and get Annette. They stayed a little while, chatting about something irrelevant, before they hit the road. I don't know whether to feel hurt or jealous as I saw them walk that few steps to the door. I felt hurt - not in the physical sense since that was already obvious - since they didn't think twice about leaving me alone in my room, but they don't know that since I was the one kicking them out of my room. I also, somehow, felt jealous about their relationship. Though I always see them almost every day, it was just that instant, when Tristan took Annette hand and brushed his hand lightly in her cheek as he look down at her with a smile, l realize that I wanted someone to gaze at me lovingly as my brother did to my best friend.





Those thoughts lingered in my head as I lay there in bed, trying to let sleep take me. I don't want to seem pathetic, but I felt pathetic in that moment. My boyfriend, who I thought I really love and I wanted to marry - a conclusion I regretted to ever have thought - cheated behind my back in one of the places I hated in the world ( I also came to that conclusion since that was the place he did it). I close my eyes, wanting it to be close forever; but, I knew that wasn't happening any time soon since the pain in my arm and leg just got more and more prominent. Thus, sleeping soundly tonight would be hard.