Sweet Chocolate

Alaina

"Lainy, get up its time for school and you better not be late again or imma beat yo lil behind"

I heard my mom yell from downstairs; I swear I hate getting up this early they needa have school at night this 5 a.m shit dead asf. "Gurl you better be up, if I have to come up ther--"

"I'm up ma" I yell back "damn" I mumble

"keep on mumbling imma bust you in yo head" she yells back I roll my eyes forgetting black moms can hear from a mile away

"I'm leaving and my house better be clean when I get home"

I get up when I hear the front door slam. My mom works as a nurse at the local hospital so getting up early is nothing for her, but its a stroke for me.

I walk to my bathroom and take a quick shower when i get out i throw on some skinny jeans a white v neck and my air force ones.

I check myself out in my full length mirror I brush my shoulder length hair into a bun then I rub lotion on my skin; My dark skin. I stare at myself wondering "when did I get so dark"

I try my best to think positive about myself but sometimes its not easy, especially when i stroll through my Instagram and all I see is light skins winning, dark skins are ugly but only dark skin girls; white and light skins love dark skin boys but no one loves dark skins unless she has a big butt or big boobs, but even then they don't love them for who they are but for their bodies.

As I look at myself and my skin color, my small butt, my below average breast and I realize I'm just an outcast not from my school but the world; I'm broken out of my trance when I hear my bus drive past, ugh my moms gonna kill me I whisper to myself as I grab my book bag and prepare for the long walk I have ahead of me.

Twenty minutes later I arrive at school sweating like a mad dog. I get my pass from the front office and go the girls bathroom to wipe the sweat from my forehead, armpits and apply more deodorant; when I felt I was human again I walk to my first period happy to only have a couple more minutes left because math in the morning is not my forte.

As I walk in the class I can already feel everyone's eyes on me like they never seen someone walk in class late before. I mentally groan as I hand Mrs. Jackson my late slip and she tells me she would like to speak with me after class, here we go I think as I take a seat in the middle section not too far from the smarties who sit in the front, but, way too close to the slackers, sleepers and loud talkers in the back.

Before I can start on the worksheet that Mrs. Jackson handed out I can feel someone tap my shoulder, I ignore it at first already knowing who it was and what they were going to ask so I continue with the worksheet until I feel someone tap again but harder than the first;

I turn around to see Cameron smiling at me "when you finish this worksheet you gone let me see it"

he says leaning back in his chair staring at me waiting for a response, we go through this everyday he asks and i give sometimes I even try to show him how to do the problems but that doesn't help he just laughs and copies off my paper; its been like this every class we've ever had together since freshman year and we're juniors now, Cams not dumb or anything he just doesn't like to do work, shaking my head I finally reply

"not this time Cam you have to at least try" he sucks his teeth and blows out a breath

"Come on Lainy you been helping a nigga pass all year ain't no need to stop now"

"well when do you wanna stop senior year or when your in college" I roll my eyes when I see him smile

"don't even answer that, just try the first three and ill give you the rest if their right"