Chapter Seventeen

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“Hey, I was thinking of taking Grace to the beach today.” Jennifer said cheerfully as I was playing with Grace who was fascinated by the TV.

“Yeah, sounds like a plan.” I replied, wondering if she wanted me to come. It was 9am on a late August day and the sun was bright already. I looked up at Jennifer holding Grace in my arms and looked at her. She was wearing a new dress that she’d brought the other day. Since the Christening she had moved back into the house and we were getting on fine. More than fine actually. We kissed numerous times but every time it went a little further she put a wall between me for a few hours. It was weird and awkward but I liked having Jennifer in my life.

“So, what are you going to do today then?” She asked me. I flicked my eyes down her body and sighed. 

“I’ll probably clean the house or something.” I said lamely. “Write a few songs, go to the gym. I don’t know. Relax hopefully.” She laughed loudly making Grace snap her head in her direction and giggle with Jennifer. Jennifer opened her eyes wide and crouched down to play with her. No one would have guessed that Jennifer wasn’t the mother. I doubt Grace would be able to tell.

“I know you.” Jennifer said after a while as she got up from the floor. “I bet you’re just going to sleep all day.” I ran a hand through my hair as Jennifer took Grace from me and nodded.

“That was the plan.” I joked. Jennifer picked up her bag and put it on the pram, then leaned down to put Grace in it. “I’ll be back about 5ish maybe. I might drop in and see my parents and I’ll probably go and see Sam’s mum and dad.” 

I tided the house, did all the washing and ironing, made a cake and iced the cake for tea and even made the beds in the house. I was bored and alone in a house I didn’t like living in and there was nothing to do so I gave in and had a long, deep and well deserved sleep not even waking when the door slammed shut. I woke up at 8pm to the smell of tomato and pasta.

“Shit, sorry. I fell asleep at 3, I never meant to sleep so long.” I said groggily walking into the kitchen with nothing but some grey tracksuit bottoms on, rubbing my eyes with my hands.

“Harry, this is the Holly. The Child Protective Services caseworker.” Jennifer said in an awkward and unprepared voice. I looked up and instantly covered my body with my arms. “She was knocking at the door when I got home a couple of hours ago. We were going to wake you but you were knocked out so we left you.” Holly smiled at me and shook my hand. 

“I’m just going to go and get changed.” I said awkwardly, practically running out of the room.

“Of course it was food that woke him up!” Jennifer giggled to Holly as I ran up the stairs. Another thing Jennifer was good with, being unprepared in situations like this. She had amazing people skills and could talk the hind leg off a donkey unlike me, I just muttered stuff and stuttered a little. I grabbed a freshly cleaned t-shirt, suddenly relieved that I’d cleaned the house top to bottom today, and walked back into the kitchen with a new found confidence.

“How was she today?” I asked Jennifer, picking Grace up and kissing her on the cheek.

“Lively. She slept the whole way home though, only recently woke up.” Jennifer replied. 

“Not the only one.” I heard Holly say cheekily. Holly was young, a few years older than Jennifer and I. She short brunette hair, wore quite a lot of make up and her face looked mischievous and lively. I blushed a little feeling embarrassed about sleeping for so long.

“Sorry about that.” I said quietly.

“It’s fine.” She replied, offering me to take a seat next to her. “We see it a lot with new parents. How are you coping?” She asked me when I took a seat by her. I nodded and continued playing with Grace. 

“Yeah, I’m fine now. I just needed that sleep.” I saw Holly smile out of the corner of my eye and knew that sleeping and not letting her in hadn’t done any damage. 

“OK, so who wants dinner?” Jennifer asked me, dishing up for three people and putting a plate in front of Holly and I.

“I’m just going to go and put Grace to bed.” I said, getting up from the table and smiling at them both.

When I came back down again they had both began eating. “So Harry, tell me about yourself.” Holly said, smiling brightly at me.

“Well, uh, I’m 23 and I’m in a band. That’s pretty much it right now.” I said, feeling embarrassed that that it was all I could say about myself.

“So you’re in a band. Do you travel a lot?”

“No, not really. We used to, but we were waiting till Grace had grown up a bit so Louis could spend time with his family till we did anything with music. We’ve recorded a few things recently, but I doubt we’ll do anything like travelling for a long time.” Holly smiled seeing how much music meant to me and nodded.

“So, family time.. Are you seeing any one?” I looked up at Jennifer who was playing with her food awkwardly.

“No. I’m not seeing any one.” I said quietly. Holly raised her eyebrows at me and looked at Jennifer.

“Look, I can’t say anything about this relationship, but you guys need to be the best family you can be for Grace. You're two young adults living under the same roof with a child, you can't hook up and then have a huge fights and one of you walks out. You have to be there for Grace.” I nodded my head and took a large mouthful not saying anything about Jennifer walking out.

“It won’t happen again.” Jennifer said quietly looking guiltily at me. I smiled and began eating praying that the questions for me were over.

“So, Harry.” I chewed my mouthful and looked at Holly. “How do you feel about the deaths of Louis and Samantha. You were close weren’t you.” I sighed and said nothing, taking another mouthful. “Do you not like to talk about it?” She asked me, almost trying to get a reaction out of me. Once again I said nothing and carried on eating.

“No one really likes talking about it. Who would? Our best friends have died, our lives have been completely changed. No one wants to talk about it.” Jennifer said gently, putting her empty bowl and Hollies empty bowl in the sink.

“Well, you guys should talk about it. And discuss what you’re going to tell Grace when she is old enough.” With that Holly got up and walked with Jennifer to the front door. When Holly had left Jennifer crept back into the kitchen and began washing up. 

“I’ll do that.” I said quietly, suddenly exhausted again. 

“No, no. It’s fine.” Jennifer protested. “You did an amazing job of cleaning today. Thank you. The house was a tip when we left.” I picked up a tea towel and began drying the things she washed.

“So what are we?” I asked her, putting a bowl in a cupboard high up. She shrugged but said nothing. For the rest of the night Jennifer stayed silent, saying nothing and for the first time in a while she slept in her own bed.

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