Forgetting Love

3

Ryan hasn't talked to me for over a week. He hardly even looks my way. When he does, it's with hard eyes and a frown. I can't tell what he's thinking.

It's weird not seeing him smile. Not at me or anyone. He's even giving his friends a cold shoulder. Ashton came up to me a couple days ago. He asked, "Is everything alright right with Ryan?"

In response, I stared at him blankly. Not wanting to answer. He cocked an eyebrow at me, "I just assumed since you guys are close friends and all..." He trailed off.

His golden brown eyes stared at me expectantly, but I never answered. I shrugged my shoulders and walked away. Now that I look back on it, I feel bad for being a jerk to him, he only wanted to know if Ryan was ok.

Ashton was just being a better friend than I ever was.

Sure, Ryan and I had some good times, great even, but now it feels like our whole relationship was built on personal gain. Ryan trying to hook up with me, and me having something to do during the weekends.

For a long time, it felt like the greatest friendship ever. Now I see how bad it really was sometimes. One thing changes, like me getting a boyfriend other than him, and we just fall apart.

Ok, so maybe I am being a little rash. It was kind of selfish of Matt and I to not tell Ryan. To not tell anyone. He does have the right to be mad at me. I'd be upset if Ryan had a secret girlfriend he never told me about.

But Matt and I's relationship is worse, though. His brother had a psychotic obsession with me, his family is one full of kidnappers, and I was a victim of their crazed madness. Yet, I have hopelessly fallen in love with him.

So yes, Ryan might be mad that I didn't tell him. But it could also be jealousy, which is very possible.

Still, there's that part of me that wants to run over to Ryan and make everything back to the way it was.

I think I may have found her, Chocolate, the same girl I was to Ryan before I was taken. The young, carefree girl I used to be. The girl that Ryan called a friend. Maybe, just maybe, he grew to love.

It's funny how it takes me to lose Ryan before I could find her again.

Now it's to late. It was only a matter of time before he found out. It's probably best that he knows. At least I don't have to hide my guilt anymore. If this is how Ryan feels, there's nothing I can do to change it.

I just finished my last class of the day. I've got an hour before I have to be at work. I can already tell this is going to be another long night.

At least my car is fixed. I won't need rides from Ashton anymore.

Why Ashton? I keep asking myself that same question. Matt is out of town doing work, and Ryan is definitely out. I suck at being friends with girls because they can be so dramatic. So Ashton is all I have.

I guess you could say Ashton and I are past the acquaintance stage and are friends. Kinda, anyways. He'll still hit on me, but I don't blame him or even get mad anymore.

He doesn't know about Matt, so he thinks I'm single still. I'll admit, Ashton is gorgeous and an overall nice guy. He's a great friend, only when he's not flirting with me.

I reach the second floor, and get off the stairs. I hate those so much, especially when I'm carrying a heavy bag. The hallway is silent. The only noise is the slight hum of the air conditioning.

I shiver slightly, who runs the air conditioning during October?

Each room I pass sounds vacant until I pass Ryan's. His muffled voice travels through the door and me. I sigh, just keep walking, I tell myself.