The New Babysitter | [In Process]

Chapter 11: Leaving

She left her space opposite me and went to sit in the spare seat next to me, then proceeded to hug me and try to remain me calm. I hugged her back and sobbed onto her shoulder.

'God I don't know what to say. I really hoped for you two.' She said, and sighed as I wiped my tears to not look so pathetic.

'Yeah, me too.' I said sarcastically. It came out sarcastic, but somewhere deep inside me I knew I meant it in a way. I really wanted him. And I still do.

'What do I do now though?' I said as I breathed out a sigh. It wasn't like I didn't want to see him, I did. It's that I didn't want him to see me. I wanted to be at a safe distance, while really with my job I was in the centre of the fire.

'I don't know.' She said calmly. I always loved this about Alice. She made any pain go away under her touch. She made me calm down instantly while I still refrained a hurricane in my mind. My brain was a warzone yet I felt at peace on the outside.

'I leave.' I say firmly, suddenly breaking away from her comfort. She looked at me as if I'm crazy and I honestly don't blame her.

'wh-what?' she stuttered. I just nodded in response.

'I have to leave.' I say, looking down onto the table, shaking my head in thought.

'You can't though!'

'I have to!' I said back, finally being able to hold still eye contact.

'The job is for Joe. You can easily avoid Michael!' she says as if it's the easiest thing in the world.

I scoff, she has no idea what it feels like, it's a mere problem that doesn't revolve around her, she has no way of understanding unless she's properly involved. I've made my mind, its set, its ready, and knowing my stubborn self I won't give up on the idea so soon.

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'You're crazy.' Says savannah, another of our friends. Ignoring my refusal, Alice called her over to a chat about my sudden change of perspective on the job. Alice, again, to my refusal, told everything Savannah, every little, unnecessary detail there is to be known about the current situation and the past history from the very beginning.

'Am not.' I refuse. I can be very stubborn, but I believe for only the right reasons. I cannot work for Michael anymore. God, I do love joe and that would be the most painful thing to do, to leave him, now that we've spent so much time together.

'You are! How could you leave just because someone doesn't love you back?' She said and I felt quite offended at the remark. It wasn't "just because" he doesn't love me.

'That's not the reason I'm leaving. And if anything, there's multiple reasons.' I said bluntly. It was technically true, on every level. I had a mental list of reasons. And of course reasons why to stay, but the reasons to leave over headed the reasons to stay by an awful lot, so it was all clear and sorted out in my mind.

'Then why. List them all.' Said Alice, crossing her arms over her chest as she repositioned herself on my bed.

'well,' I began, ready to give them a whole load of my brain.

'There's the awkwardness of the situation. There's him feeling sorry for me. There's the fact that we were meant to forget, but we both didn't. Then there's the fact that I love him, and he'll think that I'll try to make him love me. There's so many more.' I listed, my eyes wandering around the ceiling for more reasons to give. I said that there's more but that's untrue. I couldn't think of more. But it was enough for me, and should be enough for them too.

'And then the reasons for why you should stay?' asked savannah. I didn't like the fact that she was suddenly so informed about everything and suddenly had a say in all this. It used to be just me and Alice.

'Because I like Joe. A lot. I got attached.' I say and shrug. That was that, that's the only reason.

'So you're really leaving?' Asked Alice.

'She's made up her mind.' Confirmed Savannah.

I nodded.

Then they all left the room. I went and took a shower to clean up myself and also to clean up my brain a little. The water drowned my thoughts and when the water left down the drain so did my thoughts. I was sure I was leaving. But I didn't want to message Michael yet. So I just put on my pyjamas, brushed and dried my hair and then went to bed.

And with that, my mind was certain. I went to sleep knowing that it's all over.

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Whoops there I go ruining everything. Thanks to my hoes who've been reading (BUT NOT LIKING TF???) my thingy thing.
Any ways thanks to anyone and just so you know there's a smut on the wayyyyy
Peace
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