Heartbeats

Chapter Seven

I don’t know what goes on in locker rooms. I don’t want to know. I don’t want to know why Charles came out of the locker room or why he was here so early. I don’t want to know why I tripped over an invisible root. I don’t want to know why when I smacked into the left side of his chest I didn’t feel or hear anything.

Not even a heartbeat.

I felt myself stiffen and I let myself fall backward. I wouldn’t have minded cracking my head open then. Maybe all the crazy that had to have built up in there would slip out and go infect someone else. Of course there had been a heartbeat. Charles was a living person. Heck he was holding onto my arm right now. Oh.

“Thanks,” I said as I let him pull me up. Could he hear my heart beating? Was it even beating that hard? I put my hand to my chest, checking my heart rate.

“Still have ‘heart problems’?” he asked, even gracing me by putting the little quotes in the air with his fingers.

All my fear disappeared. Who was I kidding? This was Charles, the stupid, cocky boy who wouldn’t leave me alone. “Just go away Chuck. Mason is in the car, his phone just waiting for me to call.”

“Oh, I’m so scared. Why do you hide behind him Jacie? Why don’t you grow a backbone?” I wished his voice had more of a joking tone to it, but the words came out as more of a hiss.

I gritted my teeth. “You wanna know why?” The words ripped from my gut, scratching their way out of my throat. I could feel myself trying to eat them back up, the shock making my heart pound and my body shake.

“Yes Jacie. The truth, if you don’t mind.” His tone was even. He was serious. He was waiting for an answer.

“The truth is, Charles, it’s just easier!” I spat each word at him, so livid I was trembling.

“I asked for the truth,” he pushed.

I was seeing red now. “Charles you act like you have no heart! Like you’re only here to feast off of happiness. I was happy walking over here with two dollars in my pocket for coke, and you could’ve walked away without provoking anything. But no; you had to open that mouth of yours and turn from a decent guy who helped me up to a … a jack hole! How’s that for a backbone.” I didn't give him a chance to respond before I stormed off, more so that he couldn't see how badly I had snapped.

In all this fuss I had forgotten my fear, but it didn’t really matter. Not now. I was too frustrated and worked up to even think about being scared.

Feeling a bit too crowded to be alone, I turned on my heel and Charles almost ran into me. “Stop following me,” I growled through clenched teeth.

“I can’t.” He seemed worried, wounded. It was like the fact that he had pissed me off actually bothered him.

“Oh yes you can.” I grabbed his shoulder, turned him around, and started pushing him the other way. “See? Easy. Now keep walking that way and I’ll see you in the morning.” My hands were pushing hard to get him to move even the slightest.

Charles stopped letting me push him forward. I, on the other hand, fought back and pushed harder. I threw my shoulder into the small of his back and slid on the balls of my feet until I could barely keep my balance. “Fine!” I threw my hands up in the air and walked past him. Like I was going to the concession stand now. “Follow me!” I ordered sarcastically. “I’m going back to my car. I have my backpack in there and I’m gonna read my English assignment. You can come with me for all I care. Go ahead and squeeze into the back with Mason. He’s napping, you know, and you can go ahead and wake him up. I’ve tried and I know for a fact deep sleepers are not typically happy when you wake them up.” I had reached the parking lot so I dug into my pockets and pulled out my keys. I found my car easily, went to it, and stuck my key into the lock. I slid into my car.