hong jisoo.

xxviii

Dear Jisoo,

Today, I sat down and thought about what I'm going to say in this letter carefully.

Shownu told me that, maybe I should stop writing letters to you. He told me that this is probably the reason that I am recently becoming depressed.

"Stop holding onto the past. You and I both know it is bad for your health" He said

Maybe, he is right.

Maybe, I should look forward to the future.

Maybe, I should stop writing you letters.

Jisoo, today I sat down and thought about this for a really long time.

Maybe- just maybe, Shownu is right.

Because, to be honest, I am so, very tired of false hope.

I'm so tired of waiting for you to come back.

Today, I went to the places we've visited the most.

The library, the park and the cafe.

I went to the library to borrow the same book that you threw at me in 8th grade. I went to the park to sit on the same bench we always sat in. Visited the cafe that we first met in.

I did these things because I want to reminisce these memories.

I sat down. I sat down in front of your apartment and thought about this for a really, really long time.

I asked myself,

"Why now? Why did I decide to stop writing now? What was the point of writing these in the first place?"

What was the point of writing to you in the first place?

Its not like you're going to read all of these.

I'm sorry.

I'm so sorry that this is the last letter I will be sending you.

Our friends have moved on. They still remember you, but they aren't holding on to the past like me.

"Remember that time when Jisoo..." They would always say.

I don't know if you're reading this but if you are,

I miss you.

I miss you so much, That's the last time I will be saying this.

Take care.

-from Jeonghan