The Purge (Brendon Urie)

Chapter 9: Lay Us Down, We're In Love

Song Of The Chapter: Panic! At The Disco, The End Of All Things

Brendon

3 years later

I got off of the couch, looking over at Sarah, telling her that I need to go out. I took my black trench coat because I knew I had left the letter in the top pocket.

I walked and walked for what felt like hours, until I got to the cemetery. Ever since Emmy passed away everything has felt slower. Minutes now feel like hours and hours feel like days.

When she passed away I didn't leave my room for a month, unless it was to go to her grave. I developed an eating disorder from my lack of food during that period. I barely spoke to anybody, I only wrote songs. Sad, taunting songs.

I walked over to Emmy's grave and sat down, preparing myself to read the letter out loud, hoping wherever she ended up, she heard it.

"Dear Emmy,

It's been a few years since you were taken away from this planet. You were such a beautiful creature, as if you were hand crafted. I like to believe that's why the Angels had to take you back, you weren't meant to be on this planet in the first place.

Now you're back home.

A lot has changed since you left. I now have two kids, with a wonderful woman named Sarah, their names are Penny and Emmy. I had to name one after you. I homeschooled them both, because I figured if you're not their kindergarten teacher, nobody should be.

My wife does not yet know that you once existed. I never had the heart to tell her. Partially because, if I'm being honest, you were the only woman I was ever in love with and also partially because I can't talk about you without sobbing.

For a month after you died I wouldn't leave my room to do anything except visit you, but, Patrick and Pete sent me one of their songs, Jet Pack Blues, that reminded me of when you used to live in Canada, away from me. That's when I decided I couldn't give up. Your life meant something so your death had to have meant something too. I wouldn't let you become simply another victim of the annual Purge. So, I protested.

I protested every day for them to stop it, and, that day, the day the annual purge always takes place, they announced they were no longer going to do it. I was overjoyed. Thanks to you no more innocent people loose their lives for simply being who they want to be.

This is your legacy Emmy, it always will be.

Dallon and I did start the band, we named it Panic! At The Disco. We're touring the world now. I even wrote a song for you, it's called 'The End Of All Things'. Every time we play it I sob, so we try to avoid putting it on our set lists. That doesn't make it any less important to me though. Just like you. You will never be any less important to me.

I miss you so much, and I hope that wherever you are, I get to see you again one day, because it's hard living without you. You were literally sunshine, you were always cheerful and happy. You always lit up the room. I'll see you again soon," I finished, barely holding myself together.

"I love you."

I rested the note on her grave, and wiped the tears that were now freely pouring down my face. I kissed my hand, then payed my hand on her tombstone. This is the first step to forgetting, but I didn't want to forget. I wanted people to know that Emmy was such an important person, and that her death wasn't for no reason. Emmy made everyone feel like there wasn't a care in the world.

Now she doesn't need to care about a thing in the world.