15: Lavender Haze

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Luke felt his foot hit something under the covers. "Umph..." He rolled over onto his back and palmed his eyes.

Oh, God. He'd just kicked Calum. Calum who had come home with him last night. Calum who had taken the lead and made him comfortable and at ease. Calum who had held him tightly and bent underneath him, then turned him on his back and made him tremble. Calum Hood, who had come into his life as a student, now existed in it as a friend and something even closer, and, he hoped, wouldn't leave it any time soon.

He flicked his eyes to his right, watching the back of Calum's head, half covered by the sheets. Calum wasn't stirring. Luke sighed and pushed his hair from his forehead.

"It's okay. I was already awake." Calum's voice was muffled by the sheets but wasn't thick with sleep. He sounded awake and calm.

Starting the day with embarrassment. Do not pass go, do not collect two hundred dollars. "Oh...I'm sorry. I do that in my sleep sometimes."

Calum rolled over to face him. He settled back into the covers, the sheets coming up to his cheeks. He looked up at Luke. "Sometimes I snore, so we're even."

"I didn't hear anything," Luke said.

Calum yawned. So maybe he was still a little sleepy, Luke thought. It was adorable. "Maybe I was just too tired from everything."

Luke blushed. "Me too."

Calum closed his eyes and smiled. He hummed a bit of music, something that Luke didn't recognize. Then he sighed and brought his hands up to rub his eyes. He blinked a few times and laid his arms down in front of him, fingers almost touching Luke's ribs.

"How are you?" Luke asked.

"Heavy," Calum said.

Luke quirked a smile at him. "What do you mean?"

"I feel full—my body, I mean. And I feel like I'm weighted down into this bed. I feel like I've made some indentation here that would never rub out."

That's for sure, Luke thought. Even when you're gone, you'll still be right there. Don't ever stay away for too long, okay?

"Hmm," he said, unable to say anything else.

"But also light. So light. That doesn't make sense but I feel like I'm not all together. My individual molecules are spacing out."

"Light." Exactly what Ashton had said.

After a moment, Calum said, "It was really nice."

Luke's heart jumped into his throat. So they were going to talk about it. Oh boy. He knew there were two ways this could go with him: either he would freeze up entirely, or he would vomit words everywhere and scare Calum away forever. He swallowed the lump. Something simple. Something...

"It was." Well, he supposed that was good enough.

Calum looked up at him. He wanted to drape his arm across Luke's chest and pull himself close. He wanted to trail his mouth along Luke's body and climb onto him. But he didn't think that was what Luke wanted. Well, actually, he did think Luke wanted that, but he didn't think Luke could do it right now. He thought Luke was too uncomfortable. Maybe Luke was regretting things. He pulled the covers down to his neck, away from his face. "How are you?" he asked.

"I feel..." and Luke shook a little, wiggling his body around.

Calum laughed. Luke was definitely uncomfortable, but he was happy. Not regretful. That was good. "I feel a little like that too, now that I'm really waking up."

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