On The Run: Part Two

Chapter Ten - "Incomplete"

I beamed, “If your intention is to get me to miss you even more, it’s working.”

“Then, I’ve succeeded. Come on, I’m starving; let’s go inside,” he said standing up and pulling me up. I trudged along after him; at this point, I’d forgotten why exactly I’d even had to come out in the first place. My ‘mother’ was a distant memory.

*

I left the bathroom, and Fitch – lying in the tub after our magnanimously stimulating hours of playfulness – wrapped in my towel and tiptoed quietly to my room on the floor above.

I couldn't even begin to imagine the extent of my embarrassment if I ran into one of the guys or Kayla and Lexie. It would know no bounds.

Heading into my room, I sat at the edge of the bed and dried myself off, distractedly. Suddenly, I felt like my life was far beyond my control. Everything was happening so fast that I needed a moment. A pause. Just one long pause where everything and everyone would still for a period and my mind would be free to reassess everything. But at that point, control was the farthest thing from my reach and the more I tried to get a grip, the further it slipped away from me.

I wanted to cry. But I didn’t want to be weak.

So my best friend was leaving. I still had a few other friends around.

So my mother was suddenly less of a fantasy. I wasn’t being forced to make her a reality. She could be a very distant figure who I never needed to run into.

Yet, I wanted to cry. My strength was my greatest pride, but it was waning. Fast.

I pulled on a pair of leggings, a hanging sweatshirt and my boots. My hair, though recently washed, wasn’t in the best state with all its knots and split ends – having Kayla as a friend did quite a bit for my personal appearance, but seeing as we had barely talked in the last couple of weeks, I was stuck with clumpy, frizzy hair. I combed it out as best as I could and tied it into a high bun on top of my head, ignoring the falling tendrils around my face.

I went downstairs and through the swing door to the kitchen where Kayla, Lexie, Ricky and Trey were sitting around the island staring blankly at each other.

“You blinked. You’re out,” Ricky said, pointing at Kayla, whose eyes were leaking with tears.

“A staring contest?” I asked in disbelief.

“Got a better idea?” Trey asked, not shifting his gaze from Ricky’s.

“I’m done,” Lexie said, getting up and heading over to the cupboard, pulling out two full bottles of vodka. I sat at one end and watched Ricky and Trey continue their staring.

“Great. When in doubt, drink!” Kayla said, causing Ricky and Trey to shift their gazes to the shot glasses Lexie was lining on the tabletop.

I caught Kayla’s gaze and shook my head slowly. I think she’d forgotten the simple fact of her pregnancy.

She let out a sigh and said, “Fine. Be my proxy,” passing me a glass.

I hesitated. Every time I thought of drinks, I thought of Robert, and then, I thought of all the pain that came from excess alcohol. But I was feeling terribly emotional and I needed to be completely numb.

“Hit me,” I said, giving her a nod.

Ricky sliced up lime wedges and piled them onto a plate at the center of the table.

“Why didn’t we think of this earlier?” Trey asked, taking a shot.

Lexie filled the glasses and on the count of three, we threw back our shots. Before I registered the taste on my taste buds, I stuck a lime wedge in my mouth. I held my eyes shut tightly as the sharp tastes hit all my senses.