Greyson

7

Greyson,

I decided that I needed a change. I need to get out of that apartment that is meant for two and into somewhere were I'm content. So I'm renting a house.

It's cute. The wood dark and the carpet a cream color. It's a two bedroom with one big bathroom. The living room is quite large and the kitchen has just enough space to make those homemade cookies I bake during the holiday season. I love it.

Today I woke up different. I felt refreshed like I had just come out of the shower with my skin glowing and my eyes wide. Even during those moments were I thought of you, I still felt different - happy.

I miss you and in the back of my mind I'm hoping you will someday come back and sweep me off my feet once again but I know that will never happen. You've told once before it will never happen again, not by you.

It was a senior year in high school and I had just finished my scholarship notebook. You though we should celebrate. One thing led to another and then we were talking about out worst fears.

After we talked about the spiders and the clowns and the bats it got serious. You told me one of your worst fear was saying good bye. I remember clasping your left hand in between mine and listening to every single word you had to say even when your brown eyes welled with tears and cheeks turned an angry shade of pink.

You hate goodbye's and always will. You hate it when people say goodbye before they go to bed just to talk to the person again the next day because it's miss leading.

You said that goodbye's are something you should use wisely. And that if you had to tell someone good bye you wouldn't. You would just leave. No words. No notes. No letters. No emails. No texts. No calls. Nothing.

And now that I'm writing this out and thinking of it yet again. I'm sorry I was one of those goodbye's you just couldn't face.

And I'm sorry that I couldn't have made it work or that I was enough to make you stay and I wish I could have been there for you even though you had to say goodbye to me.

Yours truly,

Calle.