The Quiet Things That No One Ever Knows (kellic)

chapter 7

Kellin and I don't talk about the night before. I don't know what's wrong with him and I try not to worry but I can't help it. I just want to help but Kellin won't let me. I don't push it though. I suppose it will come out eventually.

"What's on your mind?" Kellin asks curiously, pulling me from my thoughts. We were hanging out in the library. The plan had been to study but instead we ended up cuddling and just enjoying each other.

"Just wondering how you got so cute." I say. It's not a complete lie.

Kellin giggles and nuzzles my neck, sending shivers down my spine. Does he have any idea what he's doing to me?

"So there's another party this weekend. It's in the girl's dorm this time. Do you want to go? Jamie has been bothering me about it all week." I ask, running my fingers through Kellin's soft hair.

"I don't know..." kellin says with a frown.

"Come on it'll be fun! And this time we limit the vodka to three shots." I say with a laugh. Last time we got so drunk neither of us could tell up from down. Kellin sighs giving in quickly.

"Ok but only if you promise to hold my hand." Kellin says with a goofy grin. I wanted nothing more than to lean down and kiss him. This relationship was getting harder and harder. I decided Kellin should probably get off my lap before I did something I would regret.

"I should probably get ready for class." I sigh, shifting Kellin a safe distance away from me as I try to get a handle on my emotions.

"Fine if you must." Kellin pouts.

"So I'll see you tonight?" I ask gathering my stuff quickly. Kellin's pouting face was doing things to me and I had to get away.

"Uh yeah I'll see you then." Kellin says watching me oddly. I nod and hurry away. Don't get me wrong, I love spending time with Kellin, talking and snuggling and all that good stuff. But I am a teenage guy. Kellin was attractive and I liked him a lot so it's hard and a little frustrating to control myself. I wanted Kellin so much, but for whatever reason he didn't feel the same.

That day I had music and I let out my frustration through the song I began writing a couple days ago.

"I don't care if your contagious I would kiss you even if you were dead." I sing quietly, strumming a couple of cords on my acoustic guitar. My feeling for Kellin were a little intense for me and it sucked that I couldn't fully express them to him.

"That sounds so sad." My teacher, Mr. Martin, comments, striding over to me. I shrug wordlessly. My songs always turned out sad.

"Despite the sadness, it's pretty good. Keep working on it." He says with an encouraging grin.

"Thanks." I mumble, kind of distracted by my project. When I get started on my music, it became hard for me to concentrate on anything else.

I spend the rest of class working on the song. When it comes to music I'm a perfectionist and nothing but the best would be acceptable.

Later that night I get ready for the party with Jamie.

"So how's it going with you and Kellin?" Jamie ask as we change. I sigh, pulling a shirt over my head.

"That's the thing. It's not. Kellin is great, he's more than great. He's perfect. And I like him so much it's scary. All I want to do is kiss his stupid face, but he's not interested!" I say in frustration. Every time I thought about it I got upset.

"Do you think he's just-I don't know, like attracted to girls?" I ask running my hand through my hair. I was starting to get desperate for any kind of clue that Kellin even liked me as a boyfriend and not as just a pillow.