Cranberry Clairvoyant (Azealia Banks Story)

Reminisce and Regret

I felt a bit handicapped, both physically and mentally. My entire body hurt; I wasn’t the only one, though. Others on the ship complained of body-aches, only for Dr.  Humming to brush it off as just a normal effect of the crash we endured. People were also staring at me and pouting in pity, as if my mother had died or I was diagnosed with cancer or something.

“I’m fine,” I informed them, but they continued to stare at me throughout the day. It was more than annoying. The only reason I hadn’t managed to punch someone in the face by the time the ship slowed to a stop in front of a pretty beach was because I had Milan and Destiny to keep me cheery, and try to help me remember some things.

Everyone, including me, became even bubblier and forgot all about me when the captain of the ship gave us the ok to get off, and plant our feet in the warm sand and absorb the sun.  At least, that’s what I was doing.

“Let’s go! We don’t need to wait for them.” Destiny said as she interlocked her arm with mine and urged us to walk away.

“You’ll say that until we get in trouble.” Milan offered.

“I already asked Zee’s parents, Smart Alec.” Destiny sharply replied. With that assurance, Milan and I followed Destiny toward the fair that was taking place ahead of us.

The fair was just like an actual amusement park, with a Ferris wheel and some of the other rides that a normal amusement park would have. It even had food stands and a huge roller coaster. The roller coaster, unfortunately, was made of wood. I was terribly afraid of those; if every passenger on the ship went on that roller coaster, the Terror, I wouldn’t feel the least bit left-out.

“Well I’m still going on with Destiny,” Milan said when I told her this.

“Suit yourselves,” I replied.  The first ride we went on, traditionally, was the Ferris wheel. All three of us loved Ferris wheels with a passion. We squeezed into one car and just talked.

Another reason I felt handicapped that day was because there was something bothering me, in the back of my mind, but I didn’t bring it up because I didn’t want to ruin my time with my friends. It was actually two things—one, I kept getting messages about my friends. Once I constantly ignore the messages I receive from people, the messages just stop coming from them period. But today I found myself constantly having to dodge messages. The second thing was that I was 90% sure that there was something I was supposed to do today…but I couldn’t remember.

“I always wanted to have amnesia,” Milan said dreamily as we slowly descended toward ground, toward the end of our ride.

“It’s no walk in the park, Milan.” I told her. She shrugged; I knew she wouldn’t care.

When we were finally on ground-level, Milan and Destiny’s eyes grew with excitement. I followed their gaze to see that the passengers of the ship clustered around a little building within the fair, which was clearly a haunted house. The two of them used to absolutely love haunted houses, just for the fun of it, and because I was always terribly scared of them.

“You’re not afraid of these anymore, are you Zee?” Milan asked when we unbuckled our seatbelts and got off of the Ferris wheel.

“I don’t know, but I don’t want to find out.” I replied passionately.

“Azealia, are you okay? You’ve been acting really distant lately.” Destiny asked me suddenly. I shrugged, but proceeded to reply.

“I don’t know. I guess it’s because I’ve completely recovered from amnesia, but there’s this one thing that I can’t remember. It’s really annoying me.”

“What one thing?” Milan asked.

“Just forget it, alright?” I snapped. I sighed, realizing that my outburst was a little unnecessary. By now, we were standing on the line to the haunted house. Everyone was here, but I didn’t want to be. “Go in the haunted house. I’m just going to take a walk.”

I left them, looking back every now and then to see how the line had progressed. It was moving unbelievably fast, yet Destiny and Milan still weren’t inside.

Where could I go? With the whole ship struggling to get into the haunted house, the fair appeared to be pretty empty. None of the other rides would be fun all by myself, and with maybe one other person that I didn’t know. There was no sense in taking a walk either, because I might as well go on a ride. I was stuck.

And then I saw my opportunity.

The Terror stood tall and high against the pale blue sky, its characteristics living up to the name of the roller coaster. The ride took swoops and drops in every other place, the cars rumbling through the wood. I stood right outside of the gate that separated the rest of the fair from the line for the ride. The line was empty, though.

Those people on that ride sure are brave, I thought. This was likely why the fair seemed empty without the ship’s passengers—because everyone else at the fair was on Terror.

I longed to ask someone a few questions about the safety and structure of the ride, but no fair staff was around. That puzzled me; shouldn’t’ there be someone here monitoring the line, and the ride itself? What if—

Before I could complete the thought, it came alive.

Just as all the cars on the roller coaster prepared for another dip as it paused up in the air, the wooden structure of the Terror spontaneously crumbled, sending all the cars tumbling down. One of the cars, the one in the middle of the roller coaster, was sent reeling across the beach. Right before it smashed down somewhere in the sand to my left, one of the passengers leaped out of the car and fell far, far away. Then the car instantly caught on fire.

All I could do was watch in awe and pity. I looked back, mouth draped open and heart beating endlessly, to see people catching on to the scene and running over to help. No one was running toward to the direction of the car that broke loose, though.

I guess I should.

With great effort, my feet sprung into motion. I pelted through the sand, kicking up dust to tickle my nose. My feet were becoming hotter and hotter the faster I ran. The sand was on fire!

In what felt like no time, though, I was there. I stared at the car, still on fire. There was someone inside.

I had never seen anyone die before, and I had never been in the position to help. So this was kind of awkward for me. But I couldn’t just stand there and look! I had to do something. So I cautiously walked closer to the car, as if a monster could jump out and scare me, and peeked inside. The heat from the fire was enough to make me jump back, much less what—or rather who—I was inside.

It was Ezekiel.

My knees gave way and I fell onto the grass. I held my head in my hands and cried, cried, cried, my shoulders shaking with misery. It was my fault! I don’t know how, but I could feel it. It was my fault because I hated him, maybe. What did Ezekiel ever do to me? He merely annoyed me daily and tried to hit on me every once in a while. Those are the natural characteristics of a teenage boy. He didn’t deserve my hatred. He didn’t deserve this death.

Oh, poor Darrius! Surely he was the passenger in the car with Ezekiel, the one who flew yards and yards away. He died, too. And the worst part was that his body may have gone too far; what if no one could find him?

I raised my head and looked at my classmate through the fire. I would always remember this summer, the summer when my parents rented a cruise ship for my whole school to see the world. I would always remember Darrius and Ezekiel.

Remember, remember…

And then I remembered—my message had told me. I knew they were going to die. If it weren’t for the accident on the ship, I could have saved them.

But I didn’t.