Wise Words

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Sade



The moment I at least made an attempt to kill myself to get out this situation nothing happened. I mean yea I did pass out, but when I opened my eyes my setting, my world was still the same, same dark room, same everything.

Running my hands down my face I looked at my now swollen stomach. I looked at it and cocked my head to the side.

How is this shit possible?

I lightly poked my stomach and pinched my belly button. Within seconds I felt a print on the inside of my belly.

"How long was I out of it?" I mumbled to myself.

"You were out of it for about 8 and a half months now."

I jumped hearing the voice and turned to the corner I heard it come from.

"How you are feeling?" She asked.

"Fine I guess," I mumbled looking down, not having the courage to look at the mother of somebody that loved me death son.

"You know, I tried that situation once."

I glanced up at her and sighed. She just saying that to make me feel better. I felt horrible for what I've tried to do to myself.

"And I'm not just saying that because I feel sorry for you I'm saying this because I really have tried," She announced sitting up in the chair she was in.

There was a slight silence in the room before I finally had the guts to speak to his mother.

"What made you try to do the same?" I asked just above a whisper. I looked at her in shocked as she started to reply to my question. I thought she wouldn't be able to hear me.

"I was in the same situation with the kid's father, I was so tired of him telling me what I could and couldn't do. I was tired of him treating me the way he did, so I decided to try and take my life after I had Krystal," She took a pause playing with her thumbs. She slowly licked her lips and looked at me.

"I don't know why I didn't try this earlier in life before I had Chris, but even if I tried it still wouldn't work. Killing, well trying to kill myself only backfired on me. I woke up 6 months later in the same situation, back to square one. Some people are unfortunate you know Sade. They kill themselves and can't get their lives back, but you and I killed ourselves and what happened? We right back in the same place and situation. What I'm trying to say is that killing yourself isn't the best way out any situation or problem that your facing, you have to be the bigger person and fight through this. Come on now Sade, your pregnant with Chris's child and you decided that taking your life was the best option? That was selfish of you, I'm not taking sides with Chris because what he has been doing to you, I don't approve of. I'm calling you selfish because you took your life and that beautiful babies life. That baby had nothing to do with the situation and didn't have a reason to lose its life. Now Sade I love you like you're my own and I mean it, just don't do something like killing yourself to get out problems, think of the precious life that you and Chris had created. That's the only thing that matters at the moment," Her voice spoke with power with a hint of understatement, and I loved that. She spoke the truth, she was right, and I was completely in the wrong. I wasn't thinking about the baby that was growing inside of me. I Was thinking more of myself and I hated that part of it.

Sighing deeply Chris's mom walked to me and rubbed my back lightly.

"You want to know the sex of the baby?"

I looked up at her and nodded my head slowly.

"Yes ma'am."

"It's a girl," She smiled.

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